Would you expect your parents to help you out financially when buying a house?

MLH1

Would you expect your parents to help you out financially when buying a house?

Bio Mech

Expect? No.

Grueller

MLH1 wrote: »

Would you expect your parents to help you out financially when buying a house?

They didn't and no I wouldn't. They housed me for circa twenty years and thats enough along with helping to fund my education as well which in turn enabled me to maximise my earnings and provide my own home for myself and my family.

delahuntv

Depends on many variables.

How old they are.

Their financial situation.

Your situation.

How many siblings.


If they are retired and reasonably well off and can afford to give you a contribution then, yes. I'd ask/discuss it.

If there are other siblings, they would need to be agreeable or at least have no objection.


If however they didn't have decent pension and were "young" (under 70) then dodgy ground as they would need a good fund for any health issues and costs attributable such as making changes to house, accessible car etc etc

"expect"!

FortySeven

No. Not for a moment would I expect anything.

eviltwin

No and if my kids ever asked me I would tell them to bugger off.

wakka12

If it was my first house, and I was under about 25. If I was financially stable(within reason) and moved out of home then why the hell should it be their problem!

NachoBusiness

Yes, absolutely and as soon as Western Union is available in the after life, I'm demanding they do.

Grueller

eviltwin wrote: »

No and if my kids ever asked me I would tell them to bugger off.

I would hope to not raise such self entitled little brats that they would ask. However I woild hope to be in a position to help them come that time should they need it. I also believe having to struggle financially for a while in anyones life sets them up for life with an appreciation of the value of money. I would help them out a little later when they have a family or that and maybe in a way that would protect them in the event of a relationship breakdown or the like.

KERSPLAT!

Absolutely not.

FortySeven

eviltwin wrote: »

No and if my kids ever asked me I would tell them to bugger off.

Me too, it is a parents job to bring up responsible adults. Not teach children to expect something for nothing.

zl1whqvjs75cdy

God no. Mostly cause they would say yes even if it meant they had to go without. Couldn't do that to them as they get older.

Dirty Dingus McGee

No.

Complete opposite for me.I'm probably going to have to buy the house off them in order for them to avoid being out on the street.

Toots

My parents did help me out financially, but I never expected it, nor did I ask for it. They offered and I was really really grateful.

Cee-Jay-Cee

I didn't expect it or ask but they did.

OneOfThem

No, and I'd probably refuse if they offered.

Rachiee

No never I couldn't even imagine it my parents bought be a dining table for 120 when I bought my house and I accepted that as an extremely generous gift of which I was very grateful.

helimachoptor

No, I dont need it, however if i did i still wouldnt take it, I'm a grown up :pac:

I'm the same as toots and ceejaycee. I never expected or asked for their help but they wanted to contribute towards my first home.

Lia_lia

Dirty Dingus McGee wrote: »

No.

Complete opposite for me.I'm probably going to have to buy the house off them in order for them to avoid being out on the street.

Yes, same here. Once I turned 18 everything was paid for by myself. They don't have much money!

jimgoose

Absolutely not. And if any of my own little sh1ts weren't capable of providing for themselves properly I'd kill them and make newer, better ones.

fermanagh_man

No,
I just expect them to give me their house

myshirt

I actually think it is absolutely shameful to have your parents help you out. It's more of this post war baby boom bullish!t masquerading as personal achievement, and it's feeding into disadvantage for the next generation. Our parents mostly lived through a time of improper economic advantage lumped on the credit card bill of the youth now, and to distort the housing market further by helping their kids out is just frankly disgusting to be honest. I strongly, strongly believe we should tax the bollox out of such persons.

Mr. Incognito

If you grow up "expecting" a free house then they have failed in their parenting duties and should house you because you are an idiot and obviously incapable of looking after yourself.

I wouldn't expect it or ask for it. My parents don't owe me anything, I owe them everything.

However...if I had kids who were buying a house and I was in a financial position to help them - and they weren't entitled brats who expected it - then I probably would help them out. I think being a spoilt brat isn't about what you receive, it's about how you receive it. If you pressure or guilt your parents into helping, it says bad things about you.

biko

No

katydid

Rachiee wrote: »

a dining table for 120 .

Wow, you must have some dinner parties!

jimgoose

myshirt wrote: »

...I strongly, strongly believe we should tax the bollox out of such persons.

Mmm. Y'see, this is the kind of thing I'm talking about.

The Cool

I have some help coming to me when the time comes AFAIK, my folks are not well off but my dad did some sensible buying when I was born meaning he had his own house paid off after 5 years of a mortgage and some land invested in and now, a bit put away for the 4 of us when we want it. It's not much but just meaning that I'm not starting from scratch trying to put a deposit together means a lot. I'd never expect it though. I paid my way through college as much as they did, I would make a point of saying thank you if they paid for my dinner tbh. I'm not their responsibility any more.

That said, they're not as sensible with money any more so that could fall flat on its face. When myself and the OH moved in together, they said, go out and pick yourself a big widescreen TV, get it and we'll give you the cash when we see you, it's our present to the 2 of ye. Well, I'm still waiting for that €450, three and a half years later! Gas craic, thanks folks! :pac:

J Mysterio

jimgoose wrote: »

Absolutely not. And if any of my own little sh1ts weren't capable of providing for themselves properly I'd kill them and make newer, better ones.

Haha. Post of The Day.

Azalea

Candie wrote: »

I wouldn't expect it or ask for it. My parents don't owe me anything, I owe them everything.

However...if I had kids who were buying a house and I was in a financial position to help them - and they weren't entitled brats who expected it - then I probably would help them out. I think being a spoilt brat isn't about what you receive, it's about how you receive it. If you pressure or guilt your parents into helping, it says bad things about you.

Yes, if someone's parents offer to help them because they have the means and it wouldn't cause them any struggle financially, I see nothing wrong with their child(ren) accepting this offer graciously (but not expecting or asking for it) and helping them out in various ways in return. I think it's bizarre to say there is something terrible about accepting such an offer in those circumstances, and I don't know if those who make this claim would actually reject such an offer if it arose. Perhaps some would, but I'd put money on it not all would.

Electric Sheep

Wouldn't expect, ask, or accept. Financial help from family almost always comes with strings. Paddle your own canoe and owe nothing but love and affection to family.

DEFTLEFTHAND

It would be a nice wedding gift to be given a house from the families property portfolio.

pwurple

No.

And I hope my own children never have to ask. My main hope is for them to develop into self sufficient independent humans.

Being still dependant on me for housing as grown adults, I would think that something had gone wrong. Either I messed up as a parent somewhere, or they were in some kind of disabling accident.

Lexendr

Nope

steddyeddy

To be honest I think those unless you're in a low paying job you shouldn't expect handouts in life. It's this simple. Whether that handout be from the taxpayer or an individual I think people should be adults in life and not expect a free ride. Ironically those who expect handouts from their parents are often the ones who call those in receipt of the dole spongers on here. There's at least three examples of the kings of cognitive dissonance that spring to mind.

Saying that there is nothing wrong with the dole or family handouts if you're financially struggling.

steddyeddy

pwurple wrote: »

No.

And I hope my own children never have to ask. My main hope is for them to develop into self sufficient independent humans.

Being still dependant on me for housing as grown adults, I would think that something had gone wrong. Either I messed up as a parent somewhere, or they were in some kind of disabling accident.

This. My colleague's brother is 31, never worked and relies on his wealthy (self made) parents to fund his lifestyle. He has no trouble telling all who hear "when his parent's die he'll be loaded".

Another poster on here describes how his parents still buy him clothes and he expects the parent's house. He also describes those on the dole as spongers..........

Something very child like about an expectation that someone else will look after you.

steddyeddy

myshirt wrote: »

I actually think it is absolutely shameful to have your parents help you out. It's more of this post war baby boom bullish!t masquerading as personal achievement, and it's feeding into disadvantage for the next generation. Our parents mostly lived through a time of improper economic advantage lumped on the credit card bill of the youth now, and to distort the housing market further by helping their kids out is just frankly disgusting to be honest. I strongly, strongly believe we should tax the bollox out of such persons.

I;m going to have to agree with this. A lot of people have delusions about what personal achievement is. My friend comes from a similar neighborhood to me, From the age of sixteen he saved every penny he had and got flying lessons. First earning his private license then his commercial license. He bought his own house and is a legend in my eyes.

Another character I know went to the top school in the country, got handed a job in his father's business and received a deposit from his parents.

Now there's nothing wrong with the scenario above but people like that often have some sense of achievement, an opinion about what others are doing wrong and in a false sense of self accomplishment.

DEFTLEFTHAND

steddyeddy wrote: »

This. My colleague's brother is 31, never worked and relies on his wealthy (self made) parents to fund his lifestyle. He has no trouble telling all who hear "when his parent's die he'll be loaded".

Another poster on here describes how his parents still buy him clothes and he expects the parent's house. He also describes those on the dole as spongers..........

Something very child like about an expectation that someone else will look after you.

He reminds of the old aristocratic types in England, after a period away at Eton and Oxford they'd return home to Mummy and Daddy at the family estate circa age 22 and take up a feckless existence of socialising in High Society. Then once the auld pair croked they'd inherit the motherload and title and pass it on down to the next generation of waster.

Azalea

I know people who have worked since their teens, paid their own way through college and worked very hard and achieved a lot professionally... and then received help from their parents (without their parents going into financial difficulty) with their first home. It doesn't have to be one or the other.

meeeeh

We got land and some bits and pieces for the house were bought by parents (his or mine). It wasn't expected but it was gratefully accepted. We we're not dependant on it but it meant certain things could be done to better spec. My brother and I were also gifted a house that mum inherited from her parents. She is way to sentimental to sell it, she wouldn't be happy with renting it out. At the moment my brother lives there and keeps it in good nick. I just pay taxes. I have no problem accepting that as I wouldn't have problem inheriting something.

Ruu

No, and I would decline any help (politeful of course, 'Yeah, you will alright!' *read Irish yes means no*):D

seenitall

Buying a house? What's that? Can anyone explain the concept, because I'm afraid it's completely foreign to me.

First world problems, OP!

Peregrine

We're not here to partake in your life surveys.

Peregrine wrote: »

What's your fascination with this topic?

This isn't the first time you've a started thread about how much other people make per week/annum, pay in mortgage, paid for their house etc.

Give it a rest.