biggest thing you've learned going away

arctan

so what is it?

I've had some good, some bad

Good:
-I'm not as retarded as I think I am, and I'm quite proud of the self sufficiency and resiliance I've built up

-getting away from distractions in Ireland I've achieved more in 1 year than I have in nearly 4 back home

-I'm in a work environment where my skills and talents and nurtured and actually appreciated, I really think I've be hard pushed to find something like this in Ireland

Bad:
-socialising is different, I don't care what anyone says

-life goes on back home, you do start to become forgotten about

-some people won't come and visit, no matter how many times they say they will

-finding friends in your late 20's is tough

-the English are not as friendly as they make out to be

kravmaga

arctan wrote: »

so what is it?

I've had some good, some bad

Good:
-I'm not as retarded as I think I am, and I'm quite proud of the self sufficiency and resiliance I've built up

-getting away from distractions in Ireland I've achieved more in 1 year than I have in nearly 4 back home

-I'm in a work environment where my skills and talents and nurtured and actually appreciated, I really think I've be hard pushed to find something like this in Ireland

Bad:
-socialising is different, I don't care what anyone says

-life goes on back home, you do start to become forgotten about

-some people won't come and visit, no matter how many times they say they will

-finding friends in your late 20's is tough

-the English are not as friendly as they make out to be

I did 6 yrs in London, the main difference I found is that the English just exist whereas the Irish actually live life and fully embrace it.

the dark phantom

If the Dutch ran Ireland they would feed the world, If the Irish ran the Netherlands they would drown..

Seriously if we had Holland it would be a disaster of a place, Daily floods and transport gridlock..

Dr Turk Turkelton

... there's lads that would cut ya for the coat on your back, or the watch that ya got from your mother...

Tom Dunne

- Don't be quick to judge people
- stereotypes are dangerous
- people are the same in every corner of the world

Very important for me moving to a Muslim country.

silja

- Even if you have visited many times, living in a country is different
- It's the little things you miss, not the big ones (digestives....)
- Some of your best friends from back home, you'll never hear from again. Others who were little more than aquaintances stay in touch and become good friends.
- You'll get a ton of people saying they will visit. Few ever will.

Tom Dunne

silja wrote: »

- You'll get a ton of people saying they will visit. Few ever will.

That's an interesting one. We have literally had a stream of visitors over the past number of years. I think it was as a result of two things - 1: it is relatively cheap to get here (and staying with us there are no accommodation costs) and 2: generally speaking most people would never visit the Middle East on their own, but when they know somebody living there, it's totally different.

Plus, door to door, it is 12 hours, not the most onerous of trip.

baker59

Tom Dunne wrote: »

Very important for me moving to a Muslim country.

Me too :P (France)

-finding friends in your late 20's is tough

You have to put yourself out there a bit more than normal.
Try joining a sports team or some activity.

munchkin_utd

silja wrote: »

<snip>
- You'll get a ton of people saying they will visit. Few ever will.

Arkansas is not a handy or cheap place to get to I wouldnt think

On the other hand europe or the middle east is handier to get to and in the case of europe can be a very cheap spin.

Tuesday_Girl

Tom Dunne wrote: »

That's an interesting one. We have literally had a stream of visitors over the past number of years. I think it was as a result of two things - 1: it is relatively cheap to get here (and staying with us there are no accommodation costs) and 2: generally speaking most people would never visit the Middle East on their own, but when they know somebody living there, it's totally different.

Plus, door to door, it is 12 hours, not the most onerous of trip.

Same here - I lived in Amsterdam and everyone who said they would come did, more than once!! Not sure it was me they were coming to see though :pac:

Wompa1

4 years over here. None of my friends have come over to visit. I don't think they ever will.

I'm sure they'd love to come hang out but I'm living in a place that doesn't have a lot of play with Irish tourists. It's not Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Sydney, San Diego, New York, Vancouver, Toronto etc. The mere fact a lot of Irish people are moving to those places make others curious.

I live in the South West of the US...I met one other legit Irish person living here in all my time and I met her at the airport while waiting for my bags after flying back from Ireland.

I also met some Irish who were here temporarily because their husbands were on work training but I don't count them since they were here for a cup of coffee. Ironically enough, my uncle came out here 20 years ago training for the same company!

What I have learned:


-The Generous welfare system of Ireland isn't so bad
-The air in Ireland is the best in the world
-Irish grass is really soft and nice
-People are basically the same all over the world
-Fear and Money are the two greatest motivators
-A place may seem cheaper as a place to live on paper but you need to live there to see the real cost
-City living is fine for a while but I don't want to settle in a city for life
-Most people given an opportunity, will take it over resorting to crime or living off the system
-People acting like hard b@stards in Ireland are ridiculous. If they believe they were raised in a tough neighborhood they haven't seen an actual tough neighborhood
-We, the Irish people are very privileged!
-You need to remove yourself from hanging out with groups of Irish people to really get an idea of the nuances of different cultures
-I will now gladly (with less moaning than before) pay higher taxes if the taxes are used to help even some of those in real need

zeffabelli

The language may be the same, but the subtexts are very very different...if moving around within the anglosphere.

Social codes are nuanced and take time to learn.

Childhood friends....you appreciate them because you can take short cuts with them....don't have to explain everything.

It can be fun to be other, with the glamour of difference, but it can get tiring.

You can go through the pain of transformation or you can live in exile.... tough choice.

Ruby slippers........ if only...

iusedtoknow

Been away for 10 years now, first Spain and now the US.

Things I've learned

1. Living in a place where you don't speak the language well is hard - you exist. I spoke pretty good "practical" spanish when I moved out, but it was nothing to keeping up with normal conversation. I actually found it easier to pick up Catalan "on the ground" and I still more comfortable speaking in that, though I use spanish more often with work colleagues and in-laws and my wife. I love being able to get back to spain or catalonia, pick up the newspapers and get a feel for what's going on in the city/country pretty quickly.

2. Things work differently, and that is OK. In ireland, we had assumptions of how things ran - moving to a bureaucracy heavy country was a shock but once you learned that you needed to bring 3 photocopies of everything as well as 2 passport photo's you were fine.

3. You have to embrace local ways, or sink. I saw a lot of people move to Barcelona and disappear into a sink hole of drink and drugs living in expat bubbles where their only friends were expats. Two people I know left spain addicted to drugs, having moved never trying them. I got into a dangerous situation with alcohol. Nearly lost my GF and the life I had. I got to being an "ex-drinker" and was still able to go out till 5AM partying with friends in the summer without it.

4. The US is a frustrating and fun place, and not shangrila. There are huge social issues, it's politically divided with both sides being 100% right. As a nation of immigrants, we've never once been made feel "foreign". People are generally friendly.

5. There is life beyond the pub door

6. Ireland is not perfect, but it's still a great place. It's my homeland. I love visiting, especially in summer and being up 4am for the sunrise (damned jet lag) and watching the sun rise over the sea near my parent's place in West Cork. I even miss the change in seasons (something we don't get in San Francisco) and the warmth of the people.

7. Friends come and go. I am only really in contact with around 4 people from "home". The rest of my friends have been made a long the way. I've made peace with that.

keithclancy

In Ireland the Tax System has a very weak loading on people with lower income and a high loading on people with higher income.

Compared to the Netherlands and Germany you have much more in your pocket at the end of the week.

denhaagenite

Even if you were born and spent your whole life in Ireland, Irish people will treat you as a foreigner the minute you leave. Worse, they'll treat you as some sort of traitor- regardless of whether you left before the recession or not.

It's a strange thing, because although I feel totally at home in the Netherlands I know I am not Dutch, but according to a lot of Irish people when I visit, I'm not allowed to call myself Irish either because, apparently, I don't know anything about the place :rolleyes:

nogoodnamesleft

Been "abroad" in the UK for the last 4 years. Prior to that worked internationally on short term projects in global locations in Europe, Middle East and Asia.

1. You do notice that life moves on without you back home. I visit every few months and am always surprised at how things change, marriages, deaths, even the mundane things like new shop opening or an established one closing due to lack of business.

2. How big houses are in Ireland and how cheap they are in comparison to UK. Generally the building practices in Ireland are superior/newer as most of the housing stock in the UK is of a lot older vintage.

3. How expensive the supermarkets are in Ireland!

4.. People are the same the world over. Regardless of colour, race, creed or religion there are people who will do their best to help you or will stab you in the back to gain an advantageous position for themselves.

5. Generally Irish people are incredibly laid back "ah sure it will be grand"! Which can be a good and a bad thing!

6. We have a decent sense of humor although our sarcasm is sometimes lost on people who aren't Irish!

7. How punitive the tax system in Ireland is. I recently investigated what the difference would be tax wise between the UK and Ireland. USC was the biggest difference...that's not including what the additional cost of health insurance would be.

8. Do not expect to keep your Irish mobile number especially if with Vodafone Ireland.

9. Surprisingly how forward thinking Ireland is in certain respects such as the banning of smoking in public places or the plastic bag tax. The plastic bag tax only came into affect in the Uk last week!

10.How utterly ****e were are in other respects like infrastructure. ICE train in main land Europe for example was some where in the region of 110 euro to go from Schipol to Germany. Dublin to Kerry is extortionate for 70euro.

One item i found particularly annoying is traffic lights. In the UK they turn amber to green. Ireland they turn just Green immediately, so time lost which could get more traffic through. Also no traffic sensors to detect traffic congestion which could optimise traffic flow.

11. Buoyant job market abroad with better money than at home, larger projects (more experience and more skill set development).

12. How good the Irish education system is.

13. Celtic tiger cubs...the sense of self entitlement of some of them literally has to be witnessed to be believed. No sense of grafting and think they know it all.

NoCrackHaving

Who your real friends are. Seriously, the amount of people who make not just little but no effort to stay in contact with you once you've left Ireland is incredible. I could probably count on 4 or 5 fingers the people who've made an effort to call or visit since I left. They couldn't even be bothered sending an email or text. As a result whenever I visit Ireland they're the only one's I meet. If someone can't be bothered to stay in contact with me why should I be expected to return the favour.

Wompa1

NoCrackHaving wrote: »

Who your real friends are. Seriously, the amount of people who make not just little but no effort to stay in contact with you once you've left Ireland is incredible. I could probably count on 4 or 5 fingers the people who've made an effort to call or visit since I left. They couldn't even be bothered sending an email or text. As a result whenever I visit Ireland they're the only one's I meet. If someone can't be bothered to stay in contact with me why should I be expected to return the favour.

Did you stay in contact yourself?

I have 0 friends that have stayed in regular contact. But I'll post something on Facebook or Twitter and they'll comment or post. I don't really care about having a phone call...I talk to my parents most weekends. Sometimes we miss a week, like this weekend due to them having visitors or if I go away for the weekend...

I think when you're moving away. Particularly if there's a massive time difference, it's not going.

I also have not been very good at reaching out. I think you're better off only meeting up with a few people when home anyways. I try to meet everybody, every time and it's a b1tch juggling around peoples schedules. You end up constantly waiting or trying to get into people. MEH!

wuffly

NoCrackHaving wrote: »

Who your real friends are. Seriously, the amount of people who make not just little but no effort to stay in contact with you once you've left Ireland is incredible. I could probably count on 4 or 5 fingers the people who've made an effort to call or visit since I left. They couldn't even be bothered sending an email or text. As a result whenever I visit Ireland they're the only one's I meet. If someone can't be bothered to stay in contact with me why should I be expected to return the favour.

Can't say I agree with this to honest. I'm the one that moved so I made an extra effort to stay in touch. In the last few years whatsapp has made it very handy to stay in touch with groups and have a bit of banter. My friends are from all over Ireland anyway. It does wreck my head trying organise a meetup and as we are in regular contact they don't always realise that i need to be organised when I go home and can't go with the flow... they mock the spreadsheet! lol And the gang that tell me to call when I'm passing like I'm flaming Santa Claus but still love them! We've had a good few visitors and some promisers and a few that have said honestly that the middle east isn't their cup of tea which is fair enough.

Biggest thing I have learned is what I am capable of, professionally especially, I had no idea what i could really do. On a personal and relationship level moving abroad is hard and can be hard on a relationship when its just the two of you and things are $hite, you really get to know each other warts and all. Overall having your horizons broadened by good and not so good experiences is generally a positive thing.

jank

Ireland is actually a great place to live but...
Some things about the place will make you resent the place

Ireland is small, very small. It is only when you leave you realise who parochial and closed minded society can be (true of many places tbf).

We are not a serious people
This means we are generally laid back and good fun to be around.
This also means we do a bad job doing the basics of running a country or even a county council

Enormous sense of entitlement throughout all of society.
Irish media is hugely left wing regarding fiscal matters
Tax for middle income and high earners is quite large

Irish people swing wildly from 'we are the greatest small country in the world' to 'I hate this dump/kip/3rd world country' almost in mid sentence.
On average you are hugely privileged to have been born in Ireland regardless of your background or social status once you see real African/Asian/S.American poverty.
We are not an aspirational people and have deep cynicism rooted in us.

The weather really sucks in Ireland

Formosa

Been referred to a few times above, but we have no idea what real hardship is.

The life of thousands of Asians in the Middle East is truly appalling.

Riverireland

denhaagenite wrote: »

Even if you were born and spent your whole life in Ireland, Irish people will treat you as a foreigner the minute you leave. Worse, they'll treat you as some sort of traitor- regardless of whether you left before the recession or not.

It's a strange thing, because although I feel totally at home in the Netherlands I know I am not Dutch, but according to a lot of Irish people when I visit, I'm not allowed to call myself Irish either because, apparently, I don't know anything about the place :rolleyes:

If you happen to be from cork they act the same if you move to dublin.

Stranger Danger

That most Irish people haven't a clue how lucky and affluent they are compared with the vast majority of people in the world.

The amount of whinging that goes on over a charge of a couple of euro a week for clean potable water on tap (hozza!) for example, which in some places would be an unimaginable luxury.

Startagain2010

Formosa wrote: »

Been referred to a few times above, but we have no idea what real hardship is.

The life of thousands of Asians in the Middle East is truly appalling.

Yes, it is. Mind you, they can be pretty hateful to each other also. The lack of human rights, particularly for people from 3rd world countries is shameful. As mentioned already, we are very lucky being born in the West.

I've learned that the Irish Education System is FAR superior to anything on offer in the ME, particularly the British Curriculum. Irish teachers are so bright and intelligent! We are very lucky in Ireland in this regard. In Ireland, education is considered very important and having very well qualified, bright people to deliver that education is a given at home.....not so for the BC

The ME gives the West the 2 fingers with regard to recycling, non existent here.

Sunshine is wonderful but pretty much 365 days a year and EXTREME heat for over half the year is hard going and has become SOOOO boring. Regardless of the rain, Ireland really is a beautiful country, so fresh and lush. Fresh air is a rare commodity here.

Seasons are not as overrated as I once though.

Irish people are so clever, witty and great fun!

No matter where you go, you will always meet wonderful people from every country, creed and colour.

jester77

One thing I've noticed is just how bad Irish politics is. They have a very poor handle on basic economics. You only have to look at the people who are holding ministerial positions. In other countries these people would have high qualifications, but this is generally not the case in Ireland. Yesterdays budget was a great example. The country has large debt and is borrowing a lot of money to keep it running. Instead of trying to combat the problems, the government were only worried about buying votes for an upcoming election. People give about high taxes, but really they are not high at all. The problem is where this tax money is being spent. The current political setup will never have me returning.

Tom Dunne

Stranger Danger wrote: »

That most Irish people haven't a clue how lucky and affluent they are compared with the vast majority of people in the world.

Yeah, I think I only realised the White Man Privilege when I moved abroad.

jester77 wrote: »

One thing I've noticed is just how bad Irish politics is. They have a very poor handle on basic economics. You only have to look at the people who are holding ministerial positions. In other countries these people would have high qualifications, but this is generally not the case in Ireland. Yesterdays budget was a great example. The country has large debt and is borrowing a lot of money to keep it running. Instead of trying to combat the problems, the government were only worried about buying votes for an upcoming election. People give about high taxes, but really they are not high at all. The problem is where this tax money is being spent. The current political setup will never have me returning.

Wasn't there something in one of the many reports into the banking crisis that there was only one person in the whole department of finance with a PhD in finance?

Random OT fact - the Iranian parliament has more PhDs from US universities than the US government.

Old Perry

Alot of good points. Totally agree about xirish politics, lazy and slap stick is how i'd discribe it.

Also the irish accent is a pain in the hole. And on that point also, irish-english may well be a language of its own. We have some funny mannerisms/expressions . 'a pain in the hole' being one, i got some funny looks when i used that, some concerned looks also

fits

Spent a lot of time in Finland the last few years. Things I have learned.
- Cycling to work is grand up to -25C after which your breath freezes on your face, inside your nose and your eyelashes freeze together
- Ireland may not have a 'cuisine' as such but we have an abundance of gorgeous high quality food for reasonable money.
- Parental leave which can be shared between both parents is a really positive thing to have for everyone.
- I can jump into a frozen lake and not die.
- Ireland's weather isn't that bad. I miss the unpredictability of it when I am away. Last November in Finland was tough (1 month of exactly the same cold, grey, dull days)

Wompa1

Stranger Danger wrote: »

That most Irish people haven't a clue how lucky and affluent they are compared with the vast majority of people in the world.

Absolutely! Even in America that struck me. When you're in Ireland you get all of the American tourists and young Americans in the Universities but that's not a true reflection. Those people are the wealthier ones.

I was in San Diego for work once and had a Somalian taxi driver who conversed with me about how the Irish are poor. He thought this because he would regularly have fares of large groups of Irish students over for the summer that were living 8 people to an apartment.... I told him they were not poor, they didn't come to America to work etc.

I had a young guy in a fast food place ask me 101 questions about what I do for a living and asked about if I travel for work and what is that like. I'm working with a guy in my current job that hasn't even left the state.

We're a privileged bunch