wedding procrastination

LegacyUser

I'm getting married in 4 weeks and I can't wait to be a Mrs, but my problem is I can't get motivated to do all the things that needs to be done my procrastination levels have increased tenfold. I'm with my fiance 10 years and he's getting worried about me but I can't tell him what's up with me because 1. I don't know and 2. He will think I don't want to get married.
People keep telling me this is the most exciting time and I'm not getting that vibe at all! What's wrong with me?

Rachiee

You could be stressed by the volume of tasks needed to do before the day. Sometimes if I'm stressed or have so much to do that I don't know where to start I just shut down and I don't do anything. Have you tried writing down your to do list rather than just doing it all mentally. Writing it all down can make your thoughts feel more ordered and therefore manageable, that way you can just start ticking things off one at a time. There's a lot to do in the run up to a wedding so being a little stressed would be natural and this can manifest as fatigue.
If you feel you can't get excited about it try visualising yourself on the day and remember why you're doing it.

fits

It sounds like you are overwhelmed with all that needs doing. Write a list and start with something easy. Remember to plan in some nice things too. You'll get there.

freshpopcorn

Yes, I'd agree write everything down.
Also, is their anybody you can ask for help. Generally people love helping out in these situations.

whiskeyman

Mrs _ procrastination86 wrote: »

People keep telling me this is the most exciting time and I'm not getting that vibe at all! What's wrong with me?

People say that, but it's not!!!
It can be very stressful!
Whats worse is, you think you should be happy and floating on air, then all teh stress and worry hits from all to do, and you may even have fights with your fiance(e) over small things!

As others have said, write a list of the important stuff, and tackle them.
You need to filter out stuff that's nice to have and keep on track.

Do ask for help from family / friends (the bridal party perhaps?) if you need it, or just to vent!

Best of luck!

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies! I have my list I'm kinda going meh! As for getting help I've more than enough offers but it's all stuff I've got to do!
I spent the day in bed yesterday only getting up when OH came in from work I know that's not normal, but I'm felling much better today.

woodchuck

Mrs _ procrastination86 wrote: »

Thanks for the replies! I have my list I'm kinda going meh! As for getting help I've more than enough offers but it's all stuff I've got to do!
I spent the day in bed yesterday only getting up when OH came in from work I know that's not normal, but I'm felling much better today.

Have you considered speaking to a GP? I don't want to get into medical advice territory, but there are a few red flags in your posts that sound like depression. I think you should talk to a professional to see if there is anything medically wrong first, as the lack of motivation to plan the wedding could be symptomatic of something bigger.

Calhoun

I'd be careful of diagnosing depression off the bat based on one post.

When we got married I never realised how stressed I was until after the wedding, it was like a cloud lifted when we were on the honeymoon.


Editing the post as I wanted to add making a list on its own can be counter productive, the reason why is if it's overwhelming you will be demotivated and feel how will I ever get it all done. What I would do is pick one item at a time and focus solely on that rather than the end goal.

Good advice I have heard for motivation is look after the present and the future will look after itself.

Merkin

woodchuck wrote: »

Have you considered speaking to a GP? I don't want to get into medical advice territory, but there are a few red flags in your posts that sound like depression.

This is medical advice which is forbidden in the charter, please don't speculate on a diagnosis when not medically trained. Thanks.

LegacyUser

There must be some jobs from your list that others can do, delegation is the name of the gamr, delegate some jobs out to your other half and to the other people that have asked. Also be sure to get all the jobs that you can do now done so it won't be hectic in the last week and you an enjoy the lead in to the wedding!

MagicMarker

What responsibilities does your husband to be have?

LynnGrace

Mrs _ procrastination86 wrote: »

Thanks for the replies! I have my list I'm kinda going meh! As for getting help I've more than enough offers but it's all stuff I've got to do!
I spent the day in bed yesterday only getting up when OH came in from work I know that's not normal, but I'm felling much better today.

Taking a day off from it probably did you all the good in the world. Maybe it would help to set out days that are not going to be about the wedding? Decide on certain days that you are going to switch off from it, make your lists for what has to be done on the other days, and enjoy the 'free' days.

All the best, and I bet everything will work out just fine.

adub

I'm 7 weeks away from the big day and I'm feeling the exact same way. I just want the day to be here so we can get back to normal to be honest. Everyone always says "oh it's such a lovely time in your life" well I'm not feeling lovely! In feeling moody, bitchy and downright fed up! I'm a control freak so wanted to do everything myself but I've started delegating and hopefully that'll help. We've our menu tasting coming up along with an overnight stay in the hotel so I'm really looking forward to that and on th

adub

Sorry last post sent too early! But anyway...going to set a rule (mostly for myself!) that there'll be no wedding talk until we meet with the wedding co ordinator the following morning so just a regular date night and I cannot wait!! Is there anything like that you could do to relieve stress or maybe get a massage or something

LegacyUser

Took your advice and wrote to do list and started on it! I think it was the stresses of the guest list (I know 4 weeks before hand ) that was killing me but I'm past it now. Thanks for all the advice it worked while I'm not starry eyed I'm much more relaxed and positive, alot of it was down to talking to OH he knew something was up and he jumped in and took over! Thanks again posters