Sick with stress

umbrelladoll

I walked out of my job today. Didn't quit but had enough of my manger. He has been at me for years now. Little thing after little thing and been chipping away at me. Today it came to a head and I said I'm going home. I went to the doctor and explained the situation and was told I could have 6 months off if I wish. But I don't want that. I want to come back but to a new section. My boss blocked my transfer 3 times in the last 6 moths and said I'm going nowhere. So I'm just wondering what are my options? What can I do now. I've never been out sick before so I'm not even sure how long I'll be paid for. I feel like I need a week or two away from the place though. Any help? Thanks

Streetwalker

Nothing and I mean nothing is more important than your health, mental or physical. Ring the citizens advice people first thing in the morning and explore your options. Your boss sounds like a bully. I'd make an official complaint and then ring my solicitor.

Stheno

umbrelladoll wrote: »

I walked out of my job today. Didn't quit but had enough of my manger. He has been at me for years now. Little thing after little thing and been chipping away at me. Today it came to a head and I said I'm going home. I went to the doctor and explained the situation and was told I could have 6 months off if I wish. But I don't want that. I want to come back but to a new section. My boss blocked my transfer 3 times in the last 6 moths and said I'm going nowhere. So I'm just wondering what are my options? What can I do now. I've never been out sick before so I'm not even sure how long I'll be paid for. I feel like I need a week or two away from the place though. Any help? Thanks

If you've kept a record of what has happened you can go to HR and make a complaint that you feel you are being bullied?

punisher5112

Are you in a union op?


If you are go to them 1st and go through the grievances procedure.

Union will try and put you off put push.

HR or management also will try and sweet talk you if you put a complaint through but stand up to them and push for justice.

Hope you will be ok as I have being going through similar.

Tobyglen

Take some time off, if stress is affecting your mental health then you need to re access your job. Look at moving, get your CV ready and go somewhere where you'll be valued. Best of luck with it dude and don't beat yourself up!

umbrelladoll

Thanks guys. I'm actually upset but in a good way that there are people out there who will listened to me. I'm just worried about getting fired. I can't afford to lose my job. I'm not even sure how much sick leave I'm entitled to because I've never been out sick before but I need to look after my health. I'm going to stay off for 2 weeks away. I jog everyday and today I did nothing but feel like I've ran a marathon. Thank you again. I feel like I've done something wrong and I haven't at all. I guess I'm just too soft. It took a lot for me to leave today. But years of chipping away at me it came down to this.

LegacyUser

Hi umbrelladoll,

I know just how you feel. I was getting on fine in a job until I got a new boss. She made my life a misery. I was doing the work of 2 people but despite this she found fault in everything I did. I was working over time everyday. She give me a poor end of year report in the job which ment I got no pay increase or bonus.
I waited till the busy week of the month & I rang in sick with stress. Looking back i was both physically and mentally exhauseted.
I started to eat better and got plenty of sleep. I decided that i could not stay working for them and I started to look for another job. The day I handed in my notice was one of the happiest of my life.

In your case I would eat well and take multi vitamins. See if you can find the contact you signed when you started your job. It should have details of sick leave and what your entitled to when out sick. If your company do not pay you from memory social welfare can pay you for sick time. They don't allow the first 3 days of sickness. Contact your local welfare office. You need to get a doctors cert filled in each week & send this to your local welfare office once you a claim form filled in.

I would also start to look for a new job. If they ask you why you leaving your present job I would say that you looking to gain futher experience/learn new skills and after x period of time you decided it was time to change job. Don't say I am leaving due to a nasty boss.

Life is to short to be in a job that is effecting your physical or mental health.

toadfly

It's now 6 days and not 3 unpaid for sick leave.

December2012

To to a solicitor pronto.
You should not have to work in that environment at all.

Acara

December2012 wrote: »

To to a solicitor pronto.
You should not have to work in that environment at all.

Health comes first.

December2012

Acara wrote: »

Health comes first.

Absolutely. Legal advice should give you reassurance

Mrs OBumble

All good advice above.

In a week or two, after you've calmed down a bit, I'd look for a referral from your GP to some counselling as well. If it's taken years to get to this point, and you've just walked out rather than finding a way to get around your boss to organise a transfer, then I'd guess you've got some issues to work thru. We could make all sorts of guesses what they might be - but really they'd all be hot air: You need to discuss the situation in depth with a professional, and you may also need to learn some new skills for dealing with difficult people in your life.

Grab All Association

umbrelladoll wrote: »

I walked out of my job today. Didn't quit but had enough of my manger. He has been at me for years now. Little thing after little thing and been chipping away at me. Today it came to a head and I said I'm going home. I went to the doctor and explained the situation and was told I could have 6 months off if I wish. But I don't want that. I want to come back but to a new section. My boss blocked my transfer 3 times in the last 6 moths and said I'm going nowhere. So I'm just wondering what are my options? What can I do now. I've never been out sick before so I'm not even sure how long I'll be paid for. I feel like I need a week or two away from the place though. Any help? Thanks

Any chance you or your doctor can contact your boss/hr department and tell them?

Most employers will take allegations like this very seriously. Last thing they want is to end up in court/EAT.

umbrelladoll

Well I went into the job today to meet with the company nurse and the union. In the end I told them I want to come back to work and I'm willing to having an informal meeting to try and sort this all out. I then found out as I was leaving that my boss has put me AWOL and I won't get paid if that's the case. Ive sent in my doctors sick cert but was told they can challenge that because I walked out the other day. Even though it was due to stress. I was also told my boss doesn't want an informal meeting and in the union guys words "hammer me" was leaving the other day.

Stheno

umbrelladoll wrote: »

Well I went into the job today to meet with the company nurse and the union. In the end I told them I want to come back to work and I'm willing to having an informal meeting to try and sort this all out. I then found out as I was leaving that my boss has put me AWOL and I won't get paid if that's the case. Ive sent in my doctors sick cert but was told they can challenge that because I walked out the other day. Even though it was due to stress. I was also told my boss doesn't want an informal meeting and in the union guys words "hammer me" was leaving the other day.

Well did you tell anyone you were going home and taking sick leave before you sent in the certs? I can see why you'd be put as AWOL if you didn't tell them you wouldn't be in?

What do you mean the union guy saying "hammer me"? Do you mean that your manager wants a formal meeting?

Tbh I'd say using the formal process with HR and the union is probably the better route to take.

Darkslide

Mrs OBumble wrote: »

All good advice above.

In a week or two, after you've calmed down a bit, I'd look for a referral from your GP to some counselling as well. If it's taken years to get to this point, and you've just walked out rather than finding a way to get around your boss to organise a transfer, then I'd guess you've got some issues to work thru. We could make all sorts of guesses what they might be - but really they'd all be hot air: You need to discuss the situation in depth with a professional, and you may also need to learn some new skills for dealing with difficult people in your life.

I think it's quite irresponsible of you to tell the OP they may have issues to work through. How do you know? Walking out on a job doesn't mean someone has issues with themselves.

The OP is under a lot of stress. Perhaps their way of dealing with this difficult person is a product of how they've been treated over a period of time. It seems you're blaming them for what happened.

OP, I hope you've kept a record of how your boss treated you. If not, can you recall a number of occasions? Regardless, speak to a solicitor and then speak with your HR department. Explain about your transfers being blocked etc and your concerns of over your treatment.

The problem isn't you.

bonyn

Darkslide wrote: »

I think it's quite irresponsible of you to tell the OP they may have issues to work through. How do you know? Walking out on a job doesn't mean someone has issues with themselves.

I disagree, I think Mrs OBumble is giving realistic advice. Everyone is saying "health comes first, go to a solicitor".

Has your doctor diagnosed you with anything? If so, give the doctor note to work & they'll thread carefully. I'd be very surprised if your doctor didn't discuss a course of medication or counselling/therapy.

By walking out or not calling in sick in line with company policy, it was actually an unauthorised absence. However, given you have a sick note they will probably pay you anyway.

There is no such thing as an informal meeting with HR. However, if you have a few specific examples of bullying (excluding hearsay and he-said-she-said) they might be willing to try you with a different manager.

I'd also suggest, use your annual leave for rest and relaxation. Extended sick leave is useful if you plan to look for another job but it should be a last resort.

Mrs OBumble

Darkslide wrote: »

I think it's quite irresponsible of you to tell the OP they may have issues to work through. How do you know? Walking out on a job doesn't mean someone has issues with themselves.

I disagree.

Healthy adults take action before a situation gets so bad that they just need to go AWOL. People with problems don't take action - they let the stress build up and one day explode. Walking out was actually the least harmful thing that the OP could have done, but it's still a potentially very serious workplace issue - we have no idea if this left any colleagues or clients in unsafe conditions, for example.

We also have no idea what the source of the problem is. Maybe the manager is a bullying psychopath. But maybe the employee has somehow got into a position that's well outside of their capabilities but is clueless about this. Most likely the truth is somewhere in the middle. The best placed person to help the OP work this out is a professional counsellor, not randoms in the internet who have 1/2 the story.