Cost going to a wedding as a +1??

ab4248

A friend of mine has asked me to accompany her to a wedding later this month as her husband cant make it. I have met to bride twice and had really great fun with her. I was not expecting an invite nor was I disappointed not to be asked. Any how, I think I'll go with my friend. She has ok'd it with the bride and it will be a really great wedding I'd say. My question is do I go halves with accommodation and the wedding present? I have been to weddings as +1 with men and they always foot the bill for presents and accommodation and it never cost me a second thought. Id always buy a fair share of drinks and maybe lunch the following day. I have brought boyfriends to weddings and never expected them to pay anything either. I dont know why but I kinda feel I should chip in this time even though she asked me to go with her as she didnt want to go alone? Hope ye understand where Im coming from. Should I offer to go halves??

shadowcat

Personally I would go halves on both the accommodation and the present as it could make things awkward between you and your friend if not. I invited a friend before to my brothers wedding as I didn't have a +1 at the time and she didn't give a card to say thanks, and it didn't go down too well with my family, but that could just be my family! At the very least I would offer to go halves, your friend might well say she's it already sorted, but at least you are making the effort.

Good luck!

etymon

I would defo feel I had to split it... e.g. if a guy takes you on a date and pays that's cool but if you met your friend for dinner you'd split it right? I know she's invited you, but I guess it's in thinking you two could have a good laugh together... I wouldn't chip in for the wedding present though. I would expect your friend and hubby to provide that.

shadowcat

Personally I would go halves on both the accommodation and the present as it could make things awkward between you and your friend if not. I invited a friend before to my brothers wedding as I didn't have a +1 at the time and when she didn't give a card to say thanks - it wouldn't have mattered if it was empty whatsoever, it was more seen that it was very ungrateful - it didn't go down too well with my family, but that could just be my family! At the very least I would offer to go halves, your friend might well say she's it already sorted, but at least you are making the effort.

Good luck!

ab4248

Thanks shadowcat. I do think its different bringing a friend as opposed to someone you may be romantically involved with

sweetie

At the very least go halves on the room. And perhaps offer to pay something towards the gift.

eviltwin

I wouldn't pay anything towards the gift. Its their gift, her and her husbands. Just because he is not there doesn't change that. I wouldn't think you would be expected to give something to someone you don't know just because you are doing a favour for your friend. I would put something towards the room though but remember she hasn't asked you out of the goodness of her heart, she's asked you because her husband can't go.

Wabbit Ears

Absolutely no to the present. You're a standin for the husband and it's his and her present.

I'd pay for the room as you won't be staying in the room with the wife (well, that's the official story).

Addle

I wouldn't expect contributions towards a gift or accommodation from anyone I invited as my plus one to a wedding. If offered, I'd refuse them.
And I if I was the plus one, I wouldn't give a present or expect to pay for accommodation.

ShazGV

Personally I'd offer to pay my part of the room, but as others have said the gift is from your friend & her husband so I wouldn't think you'd need to pay anything towards that.

A card to the bride & groom would be a nice gesture though. I wouldn't think you'd need to put anything in it except a nice message.

Gatica

Personally, I'd go halves for the room, it's not a date and you'd be using the room to the same extent as your friend.
I'd chip in for the present, or maybe even throw it into a separate card myself. Especially, since it's not afters but the full wedding. Certainly wouldn't go halves on it, as they're the main guest and closer friend, so will gift as they please.

SusanC10

Personally I would offer to go halves on the hotel room. I would get a separate card from me to the Bride and Groom and maybe a token gift. But I would let your friend give their own gift from herself and her husband.

But if I were in your friends position I would not let you contribute to the room but would appreciate that you had offered.

Rose35

I asked a friend to accompany me as my +1 to a wedding a few years back, I did not expect her to pay towards present or the room and she didn't offer either.