Help me with my anxiety about finger foods for baby

73trix

I am such a wuss I know. I am very nervous about choking. All I'm comfortable to give my 10 month old is bitesizes of Liga - as they dissolve in his mouth. I have tried toast twice but gave up due to getting a fright over choking when babs gagged. I prepared steamed bits of carrot but baulked at the last minute. He is well able to do the hand-eye thing so that's covered with the Liga. Do I really need to use other foods at this age? Does it get less scary when he's a bit older?

Even with the Liga, I decided to try and give him a half biscuit to suck on and he bit a large piece off and I nearly died as I tried to get it out of his mouth. Can a baby eat too big a piece of Liga even?:eek:

People have suggested those baby rice cakes. I know they are smallbut can baby manage a whole one or do I break them into tiny pieces aswell? Tahnks.

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I was the exact same! It took me well over a year to start giving lumpier food. I weaned using purée food but just gave lots of variety. I couldn't bare giving a Liga biscuit either because I was terrified of choking and because I find them quite sweet anyway. Just go with your own gut for the time being, you will eventually feel more comfortable giving lumpier food. My daughter has a fantastic appetite now, she would eat the hand off you and would eat anything so to me it shouldn't affect their diet in any way.

Elliottsmum79

I was this mommy! Did some early finger foods with a nurse friends at a cafe as I was so nevous! Best thing to do is buy a good book on Baby Led weaning (even if you are not doing full BLW see )and have some faith! Nearly all babies cough and splutter their way around normal food as they learn to eat. Repeat- this is normal! You need to be able to take a big breath when this happens or when they take a ginormous bit of something!

They have a gag reflex they need to figure out and will somtimes bit off more than they can chew. But mostly they manage just fine and surprise us. Follow normal baby feeding safety steps ( never leaving them alone for example) Also do an infant First Aid course. Then tell yourself it is your job to manage your anxiety around the eating process and not pass a big anxiety on to your infant (a good daily walk or yoga, mindulness all help!) See this book on mixed feeding. Very informative. My 11 month old was eating chicken drumsticks without a care in the world thanks to my BLW ( and me getting over my fear!) Best of luck. http://www.amazon.co.uk/Weaning-Made-Easy-feeding-baby-led/dp/1905410697/ref=pd_sim_14_7?ie=UTF8&refRID=12WP1R5ES2SNFXYJPR7P

Elliottsmum79

ps, your 10 month old will manage liga fine, can bite a biscuit ok....trust them and dont help unless they look like they need it! They are exploring food and need to get confident about it!

RentDayBlues

I baby led weaned both of mine from 6 months, by 10 months they both could eat anything, I mean anything, there was nothing I restricted at all.

Although you're nervous, think about the experiences your child is missing, they need texture and to actually learn to eat, not just swallow. Food is fun before one, you're making it more difficult than needed. If you're really anxious try steaming veg until soft, then it will break apart in baby's mouth. Rice cakes, like liga, offer very little in the way of nutrition. Why not try raspberries, again they break up really easy, bananas are great too.

At 10 months you shouldn't have to cut up any snacks or foods you offer, they baby will either suck or chew it until it dissolves.

Your anxiety will disappear when you see your little one tucking into a bowl of fruit. The rule with blw is to sit on your hands and count to 10 if they are gagging. Until you let your child experience finger food fully they will gag each time as they don't know how to eat it.

I have never had to intervene with either of my two when it came to gagging, yes it was sometimes very hard to watching but I knew that they would be able to eventually move it and if not I would be able to step in, I've down first aid.

Moonbeam

Their gag reflex is excellent.
All mine weaned themselves and Honey was the only food I don't allow until they are 2.
Doing a paediatric 1st aid course might be a good idea to help with your fears.

Karmella

I've been similarly nervous with mine (and he's my second so I don't know why! I must have completely blocked out the first time round, although it was 4 years ago)

I'd been giving him little fingers of toast with no crust, and bread, and he would always do ok with those. He would gag yes and it's hard to watch. And quite often he would vomit too! I found he would vomit with rice cakes (I would break a small one in half) but since last week he seems to be able to take them now. He is eating pasta (fusilli), cheese, and steamed carrots, and today he had a stick of melon which I think he loved as he has a tooth breaking through.

He is nearly 11 months and I think it's really only in the last week or two that he's eating finger food. All I can say is bite the bullet and just do it, he will get the hang of it.

ShaShaBear

It is hard to shake the anxiety. Sometimes I have to roar at my mother for throwing full-scale panic attacks when she sees me break a banana into three chunks for my wee one to eat. She is just one and can eat toast fingers, chips, slices of ham or cheese rolled up, slices of raw carrot or pepper and most fruits.
I have on occasion watched her put an entire slice of ham or chunk of banana into her mouth in one go and she subsequently gagged and coughed. Remember, if baby is coughing, they are getting air up so they are not genuinely choking! Most, if not all babies will manage to get it back up themselves, and this is how they learn to figure out what can be swallowed, what dissolves, and what required chewing

sm213

My 5 month old is eating baby rusks and blueberries no problem.
They're better able than you think.
I have problems with my 3 year old eating due to not moving to finger foods quick enough. My baby hates purée or anything mashed so I gave in. Gags on baby rice although that's probably the taste too.
This is not every day and she doesn't get full meals or anything as she will refuse bottles of she gets it.
If she's still a bit hungry after a bottle I'll give her a bit of rusk or blueberries or put some soft fruit in the net feeder.

contrary_mary

I found it better in the early days to give larger bits of food rather than bite-sized pieces as he would just shove the bite-sized pieces in his mouth without chewing. So I'd give him a full-sized rice cake rather than a baby one for example and he'd gnaw on the edges. Finger foods are so much fun for them so definitely start experimenting. I weaned on purees/mashed but always gave finger food too so now he'll eat off a spoon sometimes (soup, cereal, yogurt) or feed himself (anything else!).

73trix

Thanks folks. When some of you say give larger pieces, eg a banana cut in threes or a full size rice cake, what if he bites off a mouth full? Do you leave him to it and he will spit it out or manage it?

ShaShaBear

73trix wrote: »

Thanks folks. When some of you say give larger pieces, eg a banana cut in threes or a full size rice cake, what if he bites off a mouth full? Do you leave him to it and he will spit it out or manage it?

Leave him to it he'll most likely mush it in his mouth and swallow or he will spit it out. The piece will be too big to go down the wrong way so if you hear him coughing just stay close but he will manage to dislodge it himself

livinsane

contrary_mary wrote: »

I found it better in the early days to give larger bits of food rather than bite-sized pieces as he would just shove the bite-sized pieces in his mouth without chewing. So I'd give him a full-sized rice cake rather than a baby one for example and he'd gnaw on the edges. Finger foods are so much fun for them so definitely start experimenting. I weaned on purees/mashed but always gave finger food too so now he'll eat off a spoon sometimes (soup, cereal, yogurt) or feed himself (anything else!).

Definitely agree that bigger pieces can sometimes be better. At 10 months, I was giving my son whole, unpeeled apples (snack sized apples with a thin skin). One day I saw my friend giving her son a quarter of an apple, peeled and cored. I thought maybe I should be doing it this way too, so I did the same and he shoved the whole thing in his mouth! With the full sized apple, he could only take small bites because of the shape of it.

A half slice of toast might be better than a finger too.

contrary_mary

73trix wrote: »

Thanks folks. When some of you say give larger pieces, eg a banana cut in threes or a full size rice cake, what if he bites off a mouth full? Do you leave him to it and he will spit it out or manage it?

That's what he's supposed to do - they're learning to eat just like us! If it's too big for him to manage he'll spit it out and go again. You'll have some gagging at first but it's all part of the learning process. I can't remember the last time my son gagged. He has very few teeth but he manages everything except meat - he'll chew on that with his gums but he can't break it up well so he tends to spit out back out.

mirrorwall14

I would also advise an infant first aid. You shouldn't put your fingers in a babies mouth as you are in danger of pushing it down their throat. They have an excellent gag reflex. My lad is 6 months and eats plenty finger food (eg toast, rice cakes, all kinds of fruit and veg pieces, mini quiches, chunks of meat). He only has purée at lunch because I had to wean early for reflux. He has gagged maybe 5-6 times and thrown up once. I had to pat him on the back once. He's doing great

Their gag reflex is very far forward in their mouth at this age precisely so that they can learn how to deal with food. The longer you wait the further back their throat it goes (as an adult ours is in our throat) and the harder it is for them to clear anything as they learn.

Just think, you don't put a helmet and safety suit on them when they are learning to roll/crawl/walk-you let them at it and just watch carefully and help if needed. It's exactly the same with food. Let them at it and watch closely, help only if properly needed.

Go for it mum, you can do it. Read up on the difference between choking and gagging. And baby led weaning.

Edit to say, it's normal to be worried but it's better to let him develop. I've had to help my husband over his fear of finger food too-he was terrified when he first had it so we both did infant first aid and one or both of us watch baby closely in the highchair. We also keep the straps a little loose in case we need to pat him on the back and practised getting him out in a hurry if needed

Jerrica

mirrorwall14 wrote: »

I would also advise an infant first aid. You shouldn't put your fingers in a babies mouth as you are in danger of pushing it down their throat. They have an excellent gag reflex. My lad is 6 months and eats plenty finger food (eg toast, rice cakes, all kinds of fruit and veg pieces, mini quiches, chunks of meat). He only has purée at lunch because I had to wean early for reflux. He has gagged maybe 5-6 times and thrown up once. I had to pat him on the back once. He's doing great

Their gag reflex is very far forward in their mouth at this age precisely so that they can learn how to deal with food. The longer you wait the further back their throat it goes (as an adult ours is in our throat) and the harder it is for them to clear anything as they learn.

Just think, you don't put a helmet and safety suit on them when they are learning to roll/crawl/walk-you let them at it and just watch carefully and help if needed. It's exactly the same with food. Let them at it and watch closely, help only if properly needed.

Go for it mum, you can do it. Read up on the difference between choking and gagging. And baby led weaning.

Edit to say, it's normal to be worried but it's better to let him develop. I've had to help my husband over his fear of finger food too-he was terrified when he first had it so we both did infant first aid and one or both of us watch baby closely in the highchair. We also keep the straps a little loose in case we need to pat him on the back and practised getting him out in a hurry if needed

All of this!!

My husband and I both did a paediatric first aid course, some girls on my birth group organised it, and it's been invaluable. If nothing else it teaches you that gagging is not just normal, it's necessary, it's how babies figure out how much can fit in their mouths, and you become so adept at sitting on your hands and just leaving them too it.

There may be some scary situations of course, but I know the right position to put my baby in if she's having trouble and have had to do it once or twice. She's just gone a year, been on solids since she was six months and there's nothing we won't put in front of her. Whether she enjoys the taste of it is a different story :pac:

LegacyUser

OP - don't put your finger in to get the food out, you'll do more harm than good.

I didn't do BLW, but I did let my little one have finger foods from early on - a lot of finger foods I was nervous of gagging, but here was my approach, because I felt it just had to happen.

Firstly, think about it this way - they have to learn to gag. If you give them food and then try whipping it out every time they eat, they won't learn what size food is ok to put in, and how it needs to be chewed up before it can be swallowed. The gagging - though hard to watch - is a learning process. Try not to panic when they do it, because the calmer you are, the calmer they will be.

Secondly, when I was doing finger foods initially I kept it small. So I gave her stuff that she could learn to chew on, but that if it DID go down the wrong way, it would either dissolve quickly, or it would be too small to cause a major problem. I gave her half pieces of of buttered toast quite early on (about 7 months), because they're gooey and wet and she used to mush up. I peeled grapes and chopped them into quite small chunks. Strawberries - ditto (they're great because they're so mushy - don't peel them though!!). Ella's Kitchen do bags of Puffits - they're brilliant because they're small and solid enough for the child to chase around the tray and pick up with their pincer grip, but they dissolve really quickly in their mouth. There were a lot of those at the start! Rice cakes are good because they dissolve fairly quickly too. Peeled peach cut into small chunks, melon cut into small chunks. Our little one isn't that keen on carrot sticks, but if you slice a carrot and cook it, she loves eating the circular slices (go figure!!). Grated apple and little chunks of cheese are all good too, as are bits of broccoli - you can cook, them cut off little bits of the florets and let him go!!

If they DO take too big a bite off, leave him alone. He will figure out very quickly that he can't manage it and he'll learn what to do with it. Have faith in him, he's wired to survive Also, as much as possible, let him pick the stuff up himself to eat because that way they learn to connect the size of what they are putting in with what their mouth can manage - if you just pop the pieces in, they don't know what size of a piece to expect, and that can make them gag a bit.

He WILL gag a bit at the start, but sit on your hands as much as you can. At 10 months he's well able, and it's really really necessary for so many areas of development - finger grip, for ability to talk (chewing strengthens the face muscles) and for learning to eat well. It's funny to watch, you give them a new food, and they'll gag a bit for two days or so and then the next thing you know, they'll be eating entire strawberries the following week.

My little one is 13 months now, and I would have total confidence that she can eat almost anything (she'd mow you down to get at strawberries!!!) Before you know it, your little fellow will be eating anything that passes in front of him and it does make your life easier too!

Dublinhurler

Our 6 month is eating bread, rice cakes, toast, croissants fruit meat etc.... I prefer giving bigger pieces that they can hold and eat themselves.

He has gagged about 3 times and although it is frightening you just have to be there and it is there way of learning. There gag system is amazing and there learning.

There is basics that need to be followed like making sure baby is sitting up straight when eating. Always being with baby when there eating.

It can be messy at times but is great to see them exploring different types of food. Tonight we're trying drum sticks it's all about letting them explore and get used to different tastes and textures.

BeardySi

The first couple of times they gag it's terrifying, but remember gagging isn't choking. A baby's gag reflex is really powerful and is there to protect them. It's important to let them learn to eat for themselves, it's also really good for developing their fine motor skills.

Our wee one has been on solids since 6 months, basically we've been giving her whatever we've even having along with chunks of fruit and veg. We don't puree for her but if it's something mushy she gets it on a spoon. If she can manage it with her fingers she gets it in front of her and away she goes. Was quite fun watching her try to figure out how to eat spaghetti...

spottybananas

A tip from a paramedic I know - if giving sausages cut lengthways not in little circle bits, as when cut in small round pieces they are the perfect size to lodge in baby's throat. And as mentioned if they cough and gag they're getting air so aren't choking.

73trix

Tried bigger pieces of pear today. Very soft so safe. we were doing great. He would put a big piece in his mouth, gag at times but smiled at me so I thought - great.....til he vom'd the whole lot up!

Ah well. I'm feeling better about it and I can cope with vomiting. He obviously needs more practice.

Fish fingers, yes or no? ONly cos that's what hes having for lunch but normally mashed wtih beans. I still mash beans a little. Should he be eating them whole?

Maybe a paediatric course would be a good idea. If I can find one.

dori_dormer

I gave cut up fish fingers no bother. They kind of fall apart when they grab them so there shouldn't be a choking problem.

Beans would be grand whole. I always just cut grapes in half. Never bothered peeling anything here!

Soldiers of toast are great too, they can pick them up and control putting them in their mouth and chew away. Leave crusts on or you're setting yourself up for years of cutting them off and fussy eaters!

otwb1

73trix wrote:

Thanks folks. When some of you say give larger pieces, eg a banana cut in threes or a full size rice cake, what if he bites off a mouth full? Do you leave him to it and he will spit it out or manage it?

Leave them with it. if it's too big they'll gag and it will come out. just get to know that gagging is the baby's way of making sure food doesn't go too far back in their mouth...if they gag just count to 10 before doing anything.... my guy always coughed the food up before then. Choking is completely different.

Doing a paediatric first aid course might help with your nerves.

mirrorwall14

It does get easier to watch the more they do it. And the more they do it, the less they gag so it works out well. I went to early years first aid, she has a website/facebook page and she was just excellent