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upcoming child's birthday

  • 15-07-2015 1:09pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Im a lone parent and my child's birthday is coming up next week. Should I contact my ex to let them know the birthday is coming up or leave it up to them to get in contact?

    Typically they always forget but now our child is getting a little older(7) and its playing on the child's mind
    we have seen the ex a total of 10 mins this year.

    the little one will be upset with no visit, card or present but at the same time whats the point when they just vanish after 10 mins of doing their duty for the next few months or longer or so with no contact?


Comments

  • #2
    Lux23
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    I would contact them for your child's sake, your kid will eventually work out that the parent that isn't around is a no hoper.


  • #3
    orthsquel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 563 ✭✭✭orthsquel


    I don't see the sense in contacting them really tbh. If they have only seen them for 10 minutes this year, then they don't really have anything to do with your child, and probably wouldn't even have a clue what age they are going to be.

    If your ex hasn't remembered their birthday by now, they probably are never going to. Do you walk down the road of sending an annual text for every birthday as a reminder, giving them a chance and opportunity to get somewhat involved or show some interest in your child's life, but until when?

    I'd be more worried if in the unlikely event a card shows up, that it confuses the child or fills them with hope and expectation. The only benefit to reminding the ex is really giving them an opportunity to get involved/remember the child, so that at least you yourself can say you have tried, for your child's sake, to protect them from the hurt and disappointment, even to feel less guilty yourself if you feel like they deserve better and deserve a card from their other parent and wish it could just magically happen, but sadly I think you might just have to face up to it all and have a chat with your child.


  • #4
    mfceiling
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,969 ✭✭✭✭mfceiling


    Don't bother. OH is a waste of space if they've spent 10 mins with "your" child this year.

    Make the birthday really special and make sure the little one has a great day. The other dead beat isn't going to be of any help or use so concentrate on the little one instead.


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