toddler tantrums!! help

celligraphy

hi guys my 20 month old daughter has started being really naughty lately and just having tantrums over everything walking , if i don't hold her , if i sit too close or far etc..., she recently decided "No" is also her favorite word lately! I have been trying to teach her how to say thanks and please etc.. but it's no use , she is getting really naughty to the point of I don't know what to do .

It's starting to get really embarrassing any advice?

thanks

How Strange

It's not naughtiness but normal toddler behaviour. I've found distraction to be the best thing so if I see her starting I try to turn her attention to something else. Id even steer her out of a situation under the pretence of 'hey let's do this..'
I also ask her to help me with something as a distraction and she loves helping.
I also ask her to use her words if she whinges for things do I make her ask for things.
If things get really bad I remove her from the situation until she has calmed down a bit.

I try not to say she's bold etc but while distracting her I say 'wow, that's great', thanks for helping me etc etc.

Shemale

celligraphy wrote: »

hi guys my 20 month old daughter has started being really naughty lately and just having tantrums over everything walking , if i don't hold her , if i sit too close or far etc..., she recently decided "No" is also her favorite word lately! I have been trying to teach her how to say thanks and please etc.. but it's no use , she is getting really naughty to the point of I don't know what to do .

It's starting to get really embarrassing any advice?

thanks

Ignore her when she is having tantrums, dont even look over, they will soon peter out.

My son has just gone 2 and used to go ape and storn off, now he might take a few steps and come back to us.

He keeps saying shoo da da go away, dont take it personally. When he does now I start saying are you being mean to dada he starts laughing.

Shemale

I agree with distraction too, my lad used to storm off into an alcove in the kitchen so I would start saying where is Matthew and walk around the kitchen looking everywhere exceptwhere he was as I moved past he would let out a laugh and when I turned my back still asking the wife where he was he would run over to me laughing andI would give him a hug

bp

Yep ignore or distract depending on the situation. It is hard and you will lose your cool the odd time (if I feel myself getting stressed I leave the room and count to 10). They cannot articulate their frustration yet.

Reward good behaviour so read a story together while they are calm and play toys together. All they want is you and don't understand that you will be free in five minutes or that dinner needs to be cooked.

I have been there believe me!!

pwurple

Distract where you can.

Also, keep an eye on the food and the naps. Toddlers get mega hangry (hungry-angry), and the tantrum you get when hangry combines with over-tired is like the apocalypse. If it's been hours since food, offer a snack and a drink. Same for sleep.

Mink

pwurple wrote: »

Also, keep an eye on the food and the naps. Toddlers get mega hangry (hungry-angry), and the tantrum you get when hangry combines with over-tired is like the apocalypse. If it's been hours since food, offer a snack and a drink. Same for sleep.

The above x1000.


Sometimes we can distract with a new activity and snap him out of it but there is a point where there's just no coming back and you have to ride it out. It does seem at the time that they are being really evil & naughty but I dunno it's just all their pent up frustration and lack of understanding.

My guy is about to turn 3 and sometimes I have no idea what the meltdown is over, his speech is a bit behind so if I don't get what he's saying after the third try, there is no going back haha!

More often than not I have to remove him from the situation -to a quiet spot if in a play centre or back to the car if at the playground. Then I just tell him we're not going back til he stops screaming & crying. I don't do this if he's upset over something/hurt etc, it's only in case of tantrums where he just needs to calm the f*&k down so we can get on with things.

It takes anywhere from 2-20 mins usually and then once he's calmed down a bit I ask him if he wants to go back in, I ask him to say sorry, we have a hug and head back to wherever we were and he's completely fine and don't get anymore of that whingey/tantrummy stuff again... til the next day haha.

Tantrums are a bit scary

How Strange

My daughter can have meltdowns if she's hungry. My son was never like that so it took me a while to figure out the connection. She has a much bigger and better appetite than her brother so I guess she gets hungry more often

Chemical Byrne

My brother & his missus used to distract their as a toddler and reward good behaviours when tantrums kicked off. For those occasions when all else failed he had utilised what I referred to as the "cool box" which aimed to ensure that tantruming and any attention seeking behaviours were not rewarded or enabled. A spare room off the kitchen had a few cuddly toys in it and a couple of big bean bags and play mats - whenever she got out of control she was put in there to vent it out in a safe environment. In their opinion, trying to reason with a shít fitting toddler was a futile waste of their energy.