A thread to say whatever you like about contraception

blue note

I was going to post this in the gentlemen's club, but decided that women might have things they like to say too.

So I dated a girl for a few years and the pill was the only form of contraception we used after a couple of years. And I got used to it.

Now, I'm dating a new girl and we're using the pill and condoms. And I'll be honest here, condoms are crap! They're also brilliant, but I just want to have a quick moan about them. Because I don't want to moan to my friends who know my girlfriend because I don't think she'd really appreciate that and I don't want to moan at her because it would feel like I'm pressuring her to go without. So boardsies reading this, you're the lucky ones who get to hear my frustrations.

Quite simply, they don't feel as good at all. In fact, they simply feel far less. And I've on quite a few occasions with this new girl not finished. Which wouldn't actually bother me, but it bothers her which makes me feel bad! As I say, I know they're brilliant I do appreciate that. But it's like eating organic free range eggs, then going back to eggs from the battery chickens being fed cardboard. I am grateful the eggs are unfertalised, but I'd still like the organic free range.

Talk about first world problems!

So anyone else want to say anything good or bad about contraception?

retro:electro

I don't think this is the forum for that. Try moving it somewhere else.

blue note

anna080 wrote: »

I don't think this is the forum for that. Try moving it somewhere else.

Surely contraception is a fairly major relationship issue? Where would be more appropriate?

ash23

Talk to her and discuss it with her.

If the fear is an STD then both head to the family planning clinic and get tested.
If pregnancy is the concern then go to the gp or clinic and discuss other options. (Preferably do both if the above)
Something like the coil is very effective. She might be willing or able to try something else if she knows your feelings on it. Or use natural family planning methods in addition to hormonal contraception.

Failing that you'll just have to suck it up.

LegacyUser

blue note wrote: »

Surely contraception is a fairly major relationship issue? Where would be more appropriate?

This forum is for personal relationship issues not general moans about relationships.

power pants

maybe you should discuss it with her

Neyite

Mod:
OP, this is an advice forum, and not for general discussion. If you want it moved to a general chat forum such as After Hours let me know.

Moved to TGC at Op's request and reopened.

Emme

Most people like to be in an exclusive committed relationship before having unprotected sex and by that I mean no barriers such as condoms. How long are you together? You say you were with your previous girlfriend a few years before you relied solely on the pill. The pill has a 1% failure rate so what would you do if you were using the pill only and she got pregnant? However the pill is more effective than most other methods of contraception (apart from celibacy )

Talk to her and visit a family planning clinic together to discuss your options.

ancapailldorcha

The failure rates of contraceptives are based on the occurrence of pregnancies within the first year of their use per 100 women, not for each time a woman has sex (1).

Emme

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

The failure rates of contraceptives are based on the occurrence of pregnancies within the first year of their use per 100 women, not for each time a woman has sex (1).

That's how failure rates of all contraceptives are estimated and not just the pill.

ancapailldorcha

Emme wrote: »

That's how failure rates of all contraceptives are estimated and not just the pill.

That's what I said.

jackofalltrades

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

The failure rates of contraceptives are based on the occurrence of pregnancies within the first year of their use per 100 women, not for each time a woman has sex (1).

This is a really important fact that needs to be taught to children in school, in proper sex education classes.
They also need to explain the difference between typical use and perfect use.
This would stop pro-celibacy groups spread nefarious statistics about condom failure rates.

ancapailldorcha

The Guardian's just posted a piece about male contraception:

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/jul/06/pill-male-contraception-prevent-pregnancy-condom-vasectomy-birth-control

Spencer Winterbotham

Personally I never use contraception. Cant stand bagging up.

Quite surprisingly the vast majority of women I have played hide the sausage with also felt the same way.

The last two relationship I have been in, covering a period of over 5 years, no contraception used, nothing, and no child was brought into this world.

How did I achieve this incredible feat??

Coitus interruptus, withdrawal or the pull out method.

With a bit of discipline this works. And you get to shoot your load all over the place like a porn star.

Diamond Doll

Spencer Winterbotham wrote: »

Personally I never use contraception. Cant stand bagging up.

Quite surprisingly the vast majority of women I have played hide the sausage with also felt the same way.

The last two relationship I have been in, covering a period of over 5 years, no contraception used, nothing, and no child was brought into this world.

How did I achieve this incredible feat??

Coitus interruptus, withdrawal or the pull out method.

With a bit of discipline this works. And you get to shoot your load all over the place like a porn star.

Hmmm and did the women you played "hide the sausage" with have the same attitude towards contraception with all of their other partners?

Might not be a bad idea to get checked for STIs.

Maybe no child was conceived previously because your exes may have had fertility issues. Maybe you're shooting blanks. Who knows?

The withdrawal method will reduce the chances of a pregnancy occurring, but it's nowhere near as effective as actual contraception. Plus it's messy, plus you never get to enjoy coming inside your ladyfriend.

Personally I'd only rely on it for contraception in a relationship where I didn't really mind getting pregnant, i.e. where an unplanned pregnancy wouldn't be a disaster. Otherwise - while I hate condoms - I'd have no peace of mind just using the withdrawal method.

Emme

Spencer Winterbotham - that's a great name for a porn star!

blue note

Spencer Winterbotham wrote: »

Personally I never use contraception. Cant stand bagging up.

Quite surprisingly the vast majority of women I have played hide the sausage with also felt the same way.

The last two relationship I have been in, covering a period of over 5 years, no contraception used, nothing, and no child was brought into this world.

How did I achieve this incredible feat??

Coitus interruptus, withdrawal or the pull out method.

With a bit of discipline this works. And you get to shoot your load all over the place like a porn star.

Each to their own, but I certainly wouldn't be happy taking that risk. Either from the pregnancy side or the STI side.

il gatto

I love using condoms. Means I'm having sex
Unless I'm using them as balloons of course.

squiggledash

Condoms are not full proof against STD's plus we all do other stuff like foreplay without condoms. (I'm not recommending that you people stop using condoms or anything silly like that just merely pointing out they are not full proof. So keep your hair on)

If your in a commited relationship(which is the only way to go imo)First of all both get tested and assuming all clear and stay faithfull to each other = Almost zero chance of getting STD's. If everybody did this we could wipe out most STD's within a year.

As for contraception that really is the ladies choice and whatever she is comfortable with, it's her body. But after the test if all she's concerned about is pregnancy I had a girlfriend who used the coil because she didn't like the pill and it worked great 2 years no problems.

Have to agree with you about the condoms. Whoever solves that problem will be a billionaire and should get a noble prize.

squiggledash

but only f you get tested first...and neither of you cheat

paulmclaughlin

squiggledash wrote: »

If everybody did this we could wipe out most STD's within a year.

As for contraception that really is the ladies choice and whatever she is comfortable with, it's her body. But after the test if all she's concerned about is pregnancy I had a girlfriend who used the coil because she didn't like the pill and it worked great 2 years no problems.

Viral STIs (half of the currently known STIs) are incurable at the moment.

And contraception is a choice for both persons. I dunno why you'd say otherwise, you'd hardly not wear a condom just because a woman chooses not to?

squiggledash

Don't be an idiot... I was reffering to female contraception. I had dealt with the condoms issue in the first part. He doesn't want to wear condoms and if she agrees and they are both in a committed relationship well then the choice of female contraception is hers, unless you as the big man are going to tell her what she should use. If she doesn't agree well then its tough **** for him and he has to wear condoms but most couples in long term relationships at some point move on to other forms of contraception and protection, just keeping it real. These two actually sound far more responsible than most couples.

By viral STI's you mean aids and herpes because everything else is treatable. Refer to my earlier answer if you both get tested and you both have no STI's and you both stay faithful....guess what?....you both get to live happily ever after with no itching and scratching...I stand by that advice.. you do what you want.

Hope the condom doesn't break.

Spencer Winterbotham

This little piggy wrote: »

Plus it's messy

Prude are we?

Thats the best part...

Wibbs

squiggledash wrote: »

Don't be an idiot...

Dial that crap right back. About the biggest rules on this website is attack the post not the poster. No more please.

Wibbs

Wibbs wrote: »

Dial that crap right back. About the biggest rules on this website is attack the post not the poster. No more please.

I thought the biggest rule was simply, "Don't be a dick" :pac:

As much as I'd hate to, I agree that condoms are pretty bad. But they're absolutely necessary, especially in the early stages of a relationship, because there's too many risks associated with it outside of a fully committed relationship.

What does annoy me, however, is the complete lack of variety when it comes to condoms. I, personally, find Durex to be absolute muck, yet this is what most shops and pharmacists stock, with some stocking their own brand, but I always find these terrible (the one and only Lidl-brand condom I've ever used broke). Durex are also a lot more expensive - I buy most of mine online.

Pawwed Rig

Deleted User wrote: »

As much as I'd hate to, I agree that condoms are pretty bad. But they're absolutely necessary, especially in the early stages of a relationship, because there's too many risks associated with it outside of a fully committed relationship.

Condoms are smelly, messy, make the whole process less fun and a complete pain in the arse but better than the alternative

Plus if you haven't used condoms in a long time, they can be exceedingly awkward and uncomfortable.