Weird, just found out about mormons

bellylint

So doing the daily ramblings around the internet and I started watching some videos on mormonism.

They believe aul jebus and his family are kinda like aliens and they hang around a sun called Kobol. They just seem to screw all their cosmic wives and have spiritual space babies that eventually get sent to the earth, so they can have a body. Apparently there are multitudes of life inhabiting planets, and each mormon is just hoping to ascend to get their own planet so they can start pumping out the space babies. Despite the inherent rascism within the religion (as much as they are trying to forget their roots on that one) I cant help but feel impressed by a weirdo getting people to believe this *ahem* religion in 1820.

I thought L Ron, was the only one to bring aliens into a *ahem* religion.
Any others out there I am missing?

OneOfThem

Some of them apparently also engage in a sexual act called 'soaking'. They believe sex before marriage is a sin, but it's not sex if there isn't an 'in and out motion' so they pop it in and just leave it in there, but there's no motion in the ocean.

They must have the will power of a professional being good at will power athlete... Surely it's almost automatic at that point?

The Backwards Man

Used to be scared witless of them as a kid, always hid behind the couch when they came on. What was the name of the one with the blondie hair again? And the wee girl with the rabbit's tail on her head? Very strange.

uch

Ah they're a great bunch of Lads

raah!

lol, der nt smrt lik u r

bellylint

OneOfThem wrote: »

Some of them apparently also engage in a sexual act called 'soaking'. They believe sex before marriage is a sin, but it's not sex if there isn't an 'in and out motion' so they pop it in and just leave it in there, but there's no motion in the ocean.

They must have the will power of a professional being good at will power athlete... Surely it's almost automatic at that point?

It gets weirder and weirder!

If you want to learn more about them, check out the book called Under the Banner of Heaven, which tells the story of Mormonism and centres around a man that commits a terrible, terrible murder.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Under_the_Banner_of_Heaven

I visited one of their temples in San Diego a few years back. Well, I say visited, but really I saw it from the inside, because you cannot enter the temple itself unless you're a card carrying Mormon. The building was beautiful - like the Disney castle!

While walking around it, I was approached by a half dozen, if not more, people who tried to convert me to their religion. I left there feeling very uneasy.

Fun tip: unless it's changed, when you visit their official site, you're given the option to send missionaries to someone's address. Might make a fun prank.

For the lazy, here is the Mormon Church in San Diego.

http://www.ldschurchtemples.com/sandiego/images/san-diego-mormon-temple.jpg

TheLastMohican

In case of sceptics, here it is:
http://www.utlm.org/onlineresources/gardenofeden.htm


Percy French was way out. Ballyjamesduff how do!

myshirt

Excuse me sir, have you moment to speak about Jesus Christ?

Wait, wrong guys. Wasn't the chap behind all this a known con man?

Meangadh

The musical "The Book of Mormon" is so bloody good. Completely rips the piss out of the Mormons- it's written by the South Park guys and to be honest is pretty much South Park but with different characters.

Funniest thing though is that the Mormons have ads in the programme for the show in case anyone feels like contacting them to join after seeing the show! They must have a decent sense of humour in fairness.

I know musicals aren't everyone's cup of tea but this isn't happy clappy stuff, just really funny un-PC satire kinda stuff.

The_Valeyard

bellylint wrote: »

So doing the daily ramblings around the internet and I started watching some videos on mormonism.

They believe aul jebus and his family are kinda like aliens and they hang around a sun called Kobol. They just seem to screw all their cosmic wives and have spiritual space babies that eventually get sent to the earth, so they can have a body. Apparently there are multitudes of life inhabiting planets, and each mormon is just hoping to ascend to get their own planet so they can start pumping out the space babies. Despite the inherent rascism within the religion (as much as they are trying to forget their roots on that one) I cant help but feel impressed by a weirdo getting people to believe this *ahem* religion in 1820.

I thought L Ron, was the only one to bring aliens into a *ahem* religion.
Any others out there I am missing?

Ah it's complete bull, everyone knows that Kobol was the first planet humans evolved on and then went on to create the 13 colonies which were wiped out during the second cylon war.