Anxiety and intrusive thoughts

Ciara M26

Hi guys I'm a 25 year old female and I have recently the past two years been suffering with anxiety and slight depression it seems to come in waves but recently my anxiety has been out of control it is starting to really effect my life . It is only recently I have been having intrusive thoughts which is bothering me the most ones about what if I turn gay or what if I am gay even though I know I have been straight all my life, I work with children and also have had thoughts of what if I loose control and hurt them or a member of my family ect I am constantly checking for reassurance to prove to myself none of these things will happen but the relief seems to only be temporary. I am having constant mood swings and panic and can't seem to sleep properly it seems worse two weeks before my period I am also very emotional and weeping. I feel likee I am going crazy and that my life will never return to normal, I am looking for natural remedies for anxiety as I do not want to be on medication. any help would be greatly appreciated as I feel I am going crazy and like I am abnormal to experience this. thank you

Ciara M26

Ciara M26 wrote: »

Hi guys I'm a 25 year old female and I have recently the past two years been suffering with anxiety and slight depression it seems to come in waves but recently my anxiety has been out of control it is starting to really effect my life . It is only recently I have been having intrusive thoughts which is bothering me the most ones about what if I turn gay or what if I am gay even though I know I have been straight all my life, I work with children and also have had thoughts of what if I loose control and hurt them or a member of my family ect I am constantly checking for reassurance to prove to myself none of these things will happen but the relief seems to only be temporary. I am having constant mood swings and panic and can't seem to sleep properly it seems worse two weeks before my period I am also very emotional and weeping. I feel likee I am going crazy and that my life will never return to normal, I am looking for natural remedies for anxiety as I do not want to be on medication. any help would be greatly appreciated as I feel I am going crazy and like I am abnormal to experience this. thank you

Have you been to a counselor? Regarding the thoughts of being gay, I think most people won't admit it, but I'd say almost everyone has had these thoughts at some point in their lives.

Foggy.nelson

Don't have much advice, but get to a go, try be clear when talking to go, write out what you want to say to him

Marlay

Hi, clearly it is not normal to feel like this, but you are most certainly not alone. Anxiety disorders are increasingly common and affect many, many people.

As has been said you should make an appointment to see a GP. Explain the thoughts you are having and any and all symptoms. There are physical conditions that can contribute to anxiety, so its worth getting checked out first.

Once that's done they should be able to refer you to a counsellor who can help you understand the underlying causes of the anxiety you are suffering.

Please don't dismiss medication entirely, it really can help. The medication is not a cure, but it would help you get the space and time you need to start to deal with the causes of the anxiety. But this is something to discuss with the GP.

As for natural remedies, there are some basic things you can do. Go for some walks. Exercise if you feel up to it. Maybe look into some mindfulness practices.

And also talk! If you don't feel you can talk to family or friends there are organisations like Aware and the Samaritans who can help. They both have helplines. Aware also run courses that could be helpful. There is a thread on Boards that you might find useful also:

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057232424

Best of luck!

Ciara M26

Thank you I just feel Like its an endless cycle some days I'm fine then this lasts about a week or so and It's like I remember all these thoughts and they come flooding back or something triggers them I feel absolutely exhausted feeling like I need to sleep constantly I also cannot relax it seems worse when I am alone I cannot sit down and relax and have time alone it makes me anxious at the very thought it comes and goes In waves and my good weeks are very good but the bad is bad I feel weepy anxious and like there is no escape

Ciara M26

I also feel as if this anxiety and thoughts will ruin everything good in my life for example I have just bought a car my anxiety has start playing tricks on me again thinking what if I get into the car and loose control one day and step on the accelerator all the way down and kill myself and whoever is with me or what if I drive off a cliff or something I know this sounds ridiculous and I know I would never do it but the thoughts pop into my head and give me knots in my stomach to the point I feel sick for thinking why am I thinking that way making me think I'm going insane or something 😞

LegacyUser

Hi Ciara,

I too have had huge struggles with both anxiety and intrusive thoughts in the past. The things that helped me the most are,
1. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Good book on this is 'Feeling Good' by David Burns.
2. Meditation.
3. Control breathing, I find that when I,m anxious I breathe faster and faster. If I concentrate on slowing it down I feel better.
4. Diet and exercise. Caffeine and alcohol are terrible for anxiety. Also its is important to keep your blood sugar levels normal.

The intrusive thoughts although disturbing aren,t you, its just the fight or flight response being overloaded by anxiety and looking for any dangers and magnifying them.

I am proof it can get better, so I wish you well

Another good book is 'The Chimp Paradox' by Steve Peters, it helps you understand how your brain works

Ciara M26

I feel like I am going crazy and if I go to a doctor they will tell me I am crazy and have something seriously wrong with me I wish I could just go back to normal it all started one day three years ago I was out walking and thought what if I harm my little sister then one thought led to another what if I smothered her in her sleep by accident ect I'm so ashamed to of ever even has these thoughts

sam34

roquentin, please do not suggest a diagnosis here. Simply put, you are not qualified to do so and it is not safe for the OP to have randomers online offering medical advice. This is not permitted anywhere on boards.
Posts deleted.

Op, I'd advise seeing your doctor. This is nothing they won't have heard of before.

Ciara M26

day one wrote: »

Hi Ciara,

I too have had huge struggles with both anxiety and intrusive thoughts in the past. The things that helped me the most are,
1. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Good book on this is 'Feeling Good' by David Burns.
2. Meditation.
3. Control breathing, I find that when I,m anxious I breathe faster and faster. If I concentrate on slowing it down I feel better.
4. Diet and exercise. Caffeine and alcohol are terrible for anxiety. Also its is important to keep your blood sugar levels normal.

The intrusive thoughts although disturbing aren,t you, its just the fight or flight response being overloaded by anxiety and looking for any dangers and magnifying them.

I am proof it can get better, so I wish you well

Another good book is 'The Chimp Paradox' by Steve Peters, it helps you understand how your brain works

Thank you reading others comments makes me feel like I am not the only one and maybe there is a light at the end of the tunnel it seems to go week on week off if I feel good and relax I laugh at these intrusive thoughts and how ridiculous they are then one day its like I remember the thoughts and something spiked me and i start to obsessed again.
Thank you

Roquentin

to the mod: No good deed goes unpunished

sam34

Roquentin wrote: »

to the mod: No good deed goes unpunished

You're around boards long enough to know the rules about replying to mod actions on-thread.

ckd

Hi, just wondering how you are getting on now. Did you go to your gp?? My story is way too long to type out here but I know what you are going through, you are not alone. I'm having a serious bout of anxiety at the moment, the first time I feel I need to see my gp about it. I hope you get some peace from it soon x

Ciara M26

Hi hope you are well I am feeling a little better it's just the intrusive thoughts that are bothering me the most but I am trying to use distraction as a method. I have not seen my gp as I don't feel I can talk to her she is a close family friend almost, also I do not want medication I am cutting out sugar and caffeine and using Bach rescue remedy and cherry plum and white chestnut flower essences along with valerian and hoping to see an improvement. Have u ever tried any natural remedies with success urself? X

Ciara M26

Hi guys I'm looking for help on intrusive thoughts and anxiety it's driving me crazy and I don't think I can cope anymore. I am a 25 year old female and as long as I can remember have been a worrier I remember as a child if I seen anything on the news that could possibly happen I wouldn't sleep at night for weeks worrying. But in the past three years it's gotten significantly worse I always had anxiety and have suffered from brief panic attacks too.

However three years ago I was simply out walking my dog when I was thinking about my little sister visiting for a sleepover which I thought would be a distraction for my anxiety having someone over.I suddenly had this awful awful thought about what if I kill her in her sleep? It didn't stop for days and days then eventually I stayed up the whole night worrying afraid I would smother her in my sleep. I am also a big animal lover but I seen a video on Facebook of a man punching a dog in the throat my stomach was sick replaying this over and over again I would leave my dog in the opposite room and not have her sit next to me In case I lost control and did that to her I also had thoughts of what if I stab myself I would have to take out knives home alone and tap them close to me to be sure I wouldn't act on it this too went on for weeks.

Aside from all this its the recent one that has been really really bothering me more then I can explain I read something about women turning gay that are married ect a work friend then jokingly made a comment messing saying I was gay I am now transfixed on the thoughts that maybe I am gay even though I have always been attracted to men and my dream is to marry a man these gay thoughts are making me physically sick and my anxiety has hit the roof I am very feminine and have very old fashioned views on gender roles I see certain jobs as men's jobs ect and take great pride in being feminine and a real ladys women being a typical girly girl who wants and needs a man.I have had awful luck with men and never had a long term relationship but that is all I desire in life for as long as I can remember as a child so these thoughts are very distressing but they seem to be lasting the longest I keep checking my attraction to men and women and testing myself but this is making it worse. I have read about ocd hocd and have thought this as a possibility as my father has ocd these thoughts are ruining my life please help 😔😔

sam34

Ciara, I've merged this thread with your previous one, no need to have two threads open. FWIW, I'd reiterate my previous advice to speak to a doctor about this as a starting point, and if you can't speak to your own doctor, find a different one.

flatey

Your doctor is your best bet. Make sure to mention your panic, they'll put you on a better path as it's a more urgent issue.

From personal experience, CBT works. It isn't a nice process but it works pretty quickly and it sticks (not confrontational, but forces you to look at yourself critically).
Mindfulness works too. There are loads of free websites, mp3s and apps around (I use the Headspace app).
Grab a few and see how you go.
One tip, the most important factor in choosing an app or mp3 is the speakers voice.
If they have an annoying accent or tone, it will put you right off.

As for the doctor telling you that you're crazy..
They won't, but so what if they did.

If you have problems with your teeth, you go to a dentist
Problems with your skin, dermatologist
Problems with your feet, chiropodist
Problems with your emotions, psychologist
Problems with your mind, psychiatrist

None of these are crazy. Mixing them up and seeing a dentist for something wrong with your feet, that'd be crazy.

As for thinking you're gay. I've often thought that my life would be so much easier if I was.
Attraction, weirdly, isn't solidly linked to sexuality.
Look at the millions of vehemently homophobic men who adore David Beckham
Have you ever met a woman who thinks penisis are attractive

I have a lot of gay friends (now that I think of it, probably why I don't have a girlfriend) and a lot who thought they were gay, but weren't.
Some of them were sure they were gay because they only found the same sex attractive, but when it came to 'the act' they instantly realised they weren't.

Comparing attraction to men or women won't really tell you anything.

You need to strip all the worry back and build a solid foundation before you move on.
Grab a mindfullness app or mp3 and go from there.

I was in a similar place to you a couple of years ago and now I'm as Zen as the Dali Lamas fridge.