Too late to train?

retro:electro

Am posting this on behalf of my sister who recently had a baby. She has a four year old bichon maltese cross who is lovely. The thing is though he doesnt like kids. He is a very independent dog and likes to be left alone and doesn't like to be pulled at. Any time we walk him if a kid runs up to him we usually pick him up in case he would nip one of them. He actually bit my cousins child before when he was trying to play with him. They are only small nips and wouldn't draw blood or anything but that's not the point, a bite is a bite.

Sorry this posted before I was finished! Anyway she is concerned about the child getting older and worried about how she will be around the dog because toddlers love to pull at things! There is no chance in hell she would ever give the dog away, he is her baby too, but could there be some training put in place for him so he knows not to nip at the baby?

So far he is great around her. He is curious but very calm and when he goes for walks he runs straight in to see is she still there.
Any advice?

Vel

No advice on training the dog as I have never had to deal with this issue but I have had various dogs since my kids were born (that sounds bad - we didn't give any up, some just got old and passed on and were replaced with others!) My eldest child is 6 and my youngest is 2.5 and what I can't stress enough is that the kids need training too!

You speak about how toddlers like to pull things, and they do, but from as soon as our kids were interacting with our dogs they were taught there would be no pulling, grabbing, taking things off the dog, disturbing them when they are sleeping etc. They pretty much had to get permission from us before going near the dogs so we could supervise all interactions in the early days. Our dogs are part of the family, living in the house so it meant we needed to be vigilant and keep reinforcing the message. We would show the kids how to pet gently and got them involved in brushing the dogs, feeding them etc. so they developed a bit of a relationship with them that didn't involve hanging out of their ears and pulling their tail and seeing them as a big fluffly teddy bear plaything!

When you have a dog who has snapped in the past and isn't mad on kids, you really don't want them put in a position where they feel threatened enough that they will snap, or worse, so that's where training the kids comes in and is as important as training the dog! Try to make as life as easy as possible for the dog by not putting them in any situation where they feel like they have no choice but to snap.

Babygates are your friend when you have a wobbly toddler around! If I had to pop out of a room for a second or was busy making dinner etc. and couldn't give a situation my full attention, then dogs and kids were separated by baby gate.

We still chat with our kids even now about appropriate behaviour aorund the dogs to keep reminding them. I can hand on heart say that my kids have never grabbed, poked, or pulled at any of our dogs.

ShaShaBear

Exactly as Vel said, toddlers need training too. Perhaps even more so than the dog!
We have a VERY rambunctious border collie that is almost one. My daughter is 11 months old as well, and already knows not to poke or pull at the dog, and only to pat or stroke gently. Toddlers will only pull out of everything if you let them. You teach them not to pull at heavy things, not to put things in their mouths etc, but so many people don't think to teach them not to bully a large, carnivorous animal with sharp teeth because the dog "wouldn't hurt a fly".
Our collie and our baby are firm friends. My daughter will sneak him food, calls him over to her for a pet and always laughs right from her belly when he licks her. But I always, always supervise and remember that Opie already knows how to behave - a baby might not. Ergo the one that does not know is the one you should teach.

mymo

Keep the dog well exercised, give him time and space for himself, is he crate trained?
A crate can become his safe place to retreat to if the baby is bothering him.

And as said above train the baby, it can work, we were all bought up around dogs (and cats, rabbits, guinea pigs and more), all taught not to grab, play rough, not to approach dogs in the street, or put your hand in the dog bowl etc, we just accepted these rules.
We never had a crate but if the dog walked away from us, we didn't follow, he'd come back when he wanted rubs. It's good to start young, the people that grew up with love and respect for their pets are often the best people you meet.

retro:electro

Thanks for the advice. She has since been in touch with an obedience trainer who is going to come and asses the situation during the week. He said to her it could be one of two things, he's a very nervous dog and is unsure of kids as he's never been around them or else it's that he sees himself as the highest in the pecking order and king of the castle and thinks he can do what he likes. Personally I think its a mix of both. I also think we are partly to blame. From day one he had the run of the place and could do what he wanted. He slept in the bed and could be up on the couch looking out the window, the trainer hinted that all that may need to stop, which will be hard to do at this stage.

I've been witness to him nipping and it's not as if he's agressive or if he goes for the person intentionally, it's almost like a reflex, a knee jerk reaction to someone invading his space. She knows that she will have to train her child too along with this and warn her off pulling and grabbing. Hopefully the trainer will be able to put a system in place so they can have some peace of mind. I know that they will want the child to be able to have her own space to crawl and play without the worry that the dog will have to be separated. Hopefully it will work out.

Nody

anna080 wrote: »

Thanks for the advice. She has since been in touch with an obedience trainer who is going to come and asses the situation during the week. He said to her it could be one of two things, he's a very nervous dog and is unsure of kids as he's never been around them or else it's that he sees himself as the highest in the pecking order and king of the castle and thinks he can do what he likes. Personally I think its a mix of both. I also think we are partly to blame. From day one he had the run of the place and could do what he wanted. He slept in the bed and could be up on the couch looking out the window, the trainer hinted that all that may need to stop, which will be hard to do at this stage.

I'd start looking up a new behaviourist if I were you (because that talk is 20 years old and more outdated than dial up modems are to PCs today)...

retro:electro

Nody wrote: »

I'd start looking up a new behaviourist if I were you (because that talk is 20 years old and more outdated than dial up modems are to PCs today)...

Why do you say that?

Nody

anna080 wrote: »

Why do you say that?

Because pack theory/Alpha leader is outdated and using such words indicates person who's not properly trained who's likely to do more damage then help you (anyone can call themself dog trainer etc. without qualitifications).

Read through this excellent page on all the myths if you read nothing else and the moment you hear "Alpha leader", "pack theory", "dominate" etc. you should run a mile in the other direction as it shows a person who's not up to date in any shape or form no matter how many shiny papers or recommendations they show you.