Scared I got HIV

LegacyUser

I had sex with another man over 2 weeks ago. We met online. We used a condom. I performed oral on him with condom on, and he topped me with condom on. No one came. After the experience, I began to freak out (it was my first experience with another man) so I went to A & E. I told them I was worried about HIV and they eventually gave me PEP drugs which I have to take for a month. I since contacted the guy and he said he's clean, but he's never taken a HIV test. When I asked him if he would to put me out of my worry, he said no.

I'm out of my mind the past 2 weeks, stressed and worried. I know I'm probably low risk but there's still a small chance I could get HIV from him. My personal life is suffering from the anxiety. I have to wait 3 months after I finish the PEP drugs to get the all clear which is 3 and a half months away. I won't last that long. I don't know why I'm even writing this. I can;t tell anyone. Has anyone else ever thought they had HIV?

ROAAAR

You were completely safe so it's minimal risk, don't worry.
Also HIV isn't what it used to be, plenty of people live normal live with HIV today. Although never let that let you think it's okay to have unprotected sex with a stranger. Always be safe.
Try not to worry.

J_E

You both practiced safe sex and neither of you came. Even with pre-cum, the odds of that leading to anything are minimal. Did you go to get tested? It sounds like you are panicking for the unknown, I don't want to say it's an overreaction but given you insisted on taking PEP for what amounted to minimal body fluid transfer, it just seems odd, why the focus on HIV here? Did you rush into this encounter or something?

ComfortKid

Didn't you post this exact same thing 2 weeks ago!

Annasopra

ComfortKid wrote: »

Didn't you post this exact same thing 2 weeks ago!

We often get questions about hiv here. Speculation about identity isn't necessary.

ComfortKid

Joeytheparrot wrote:

We often get questions about hiv here. Speculation about identity isn't necessary.

Not speculating identity at all. He got plenty of answers on his last thread. What does he expect to gain by opening another thread wirh the exact same story.

ROAAAR

ComfortKid wrote: »

Not speculating identity at all. He got plenty of answers on his last thread. What does he expect to gain by opening another thread wirh the exact same story.

The op is an anonymous poster.

Pretty fast

worriedabouthiv wrote: »

I had sex with another man over 2 weeks ago. We met online. We used a condom. I performed oral on him with condom on, and he topped me with condom on. No one came. After the experience, I began to freak out (it was my first experience with another man) so I went to A & E. I told them I was worried about HIV and they eventually gave me PEP drugs which I have to take for a month. I since contacted the guy and he said he's clean, but he's never taken a HIV test. When I asked him if he would to put me out of my worry, he said no.

I'm out of my mind the past 2 weeks, stressed and worried. I know I'm probably low risk but there's still a small chance I could get HIV from him. My personal life is suffering from the anxiety. I have to wait 3 months after I finish the PEP drugs to get the all clear which is 3 and a half months away. I won't last that long. I don't know why I'm even writing this. I can;t tell anyone. Has anyone else ever thought they had HIV?

Calm down fellow you're going to be fine. If you were protected you should be fine.

What is "topped" btw?

Greenmachine

Imagine you are going to be fine. The other fella, I am guessing always practices safe sex, so feels he has nothing to worry about. There is always some risk when you have sex with especially with a stranger. You seem to have taken all the necessary precaution. I wonder if the OP is suffering Catholic guilt, or if the worries would be the same with a female partner. Nothing wrong with what, you have done OP. Try to remain calm, and remember to always practice safe sex. Even shared a kiss with someone has it's risks.

J_E

Pretty fast wrote: »

Calm down fellow you're going to be fine. If you were protected you should be fine.

What is "topped" btw?

Topped means receiving anal sex from the top.

endacl

Pretty fast wrote: »

Whistle whistle. Thank you. I will not be asking any more stupid questions. I'm straight you see. We just call it" bating it into her", "breaking her back", "mangolising her", "busting her hoop", "animalisation", those kind of things. Thanks for letting me know all the same.

Well. We don't all call it that. Some of us are grown ups.

BattleCorp

worriedabouthiv wrote: »

I performed oral on him with condom on, and he topped me with condom on. No one came.

Must have been crap sex so. :pac:

nozipcode

You're completely over-reacting. Relax.

By the sounds of it you play safer than most do. Highly unlikely you have HIV if what you say is true. Surprised you were given PEP if you were as safe as you describe in the OP.

LegacyUser

OP here.

For whoever said it was crap, yeah it was crap sex!! I know I am over reacting, I have calmed down slightly in the past few days. Also, with regards being given the PEP, I told them at the hospital that I wasn't sure if the condom came off or not. I know I shouldn't have said that but they gave me the PEP regardless because I was in such a state. I was frantic.

J_E

nozipcode wrote: »

You're completely over-reacting. Relax.

By the sounds of it you play safer than most do. Highly unlikely you have HIV if what you say is true. Surprised you were given PEP if you were as safe as you describe in the OP.

I'm really surprised to be honest. I don't want to make light of the need for it to be available, but this certainly didn't appear to be a case where it was needed or should have been administered. I thought it would have taken a case where someone was compromised - didn't appear to be the case here at all.

jimdublin15

I would agree with everyone's thinking so far that the situation posted by the OP. I.e safe sex is very small risk.

Added EMI link below to back up the theory it's the HSE guidelines for pep and risk calculations including PEP flow based on exposure situation. http://www.hpsc.ie/A-Z/EMIToolkit/appendices/app7.pdf

However we of course don't know what was said to the A&E or ID doctor or if anything other happen not mentioned on the OP first post.

So to the OP you have a started PEP course and will simply have to wait and be tested in the few months following to confirm your HIV negative status. I am sure when getting the PEP the doctors would have highlighted the risks to you based on what you told them.

Worrying about the results in the meantime is understandable and I think reading all the reply's we all understand from your post that you are a bit scared.
I suspect most people are a bit worried and scared when getting tested for HIV, however worrying about this now is about as useful as worrying about the weather.

From what you posted it sounds to me you practiced safe sex, great. Also even if you did have HIV the treatments are highly good nowadays and as you would have discovered it early you would be able to live a normal long life with treatments.

wakka12

I think almost every man has these horrible suspicions after their first same sex contact with another man...usually the suspicions are completely unfounded. And its mostly just good ol catholic guilt. Seriously the chances of you having HIV are like 0.01% so please stop worrying for you own sake, I was in the exact same position 6 months and was wracked with guilt and anxiety. Worst time of my life, affected my emotional and physical health and what do ya know..came up clean . HIV is a hard virus to catch, seriously. Please calm down.

wakka12

First of all he needs to be HIV positive, chances are he wasnt even. Because only a small minority of people have HIV. Most people who have HIV also take anti virals which means his viral load is most likely low, meaning transmission is unlikely even with unprotected anal sex.
You also used a condom, which means chances of transmission, which already a re low, are even lower. Neither of you came, even lower chances again...

And you know even if you let a guy who you knew was HIV positive and had a high viral load come inside you, even that doesn't mean you'll get HIV. Theres just a decent chance that transmission may have occurred.

So really..youd have to be the unluckiest man ever to have HIV right now

ComfortKid

This could be a stupid question, but do more gays really have HIV more than straight people, and if so, why?

wakka12

ComfortKid wrote: »

This could be a stupid question, but do more gays really have HIV more than straight people, and if so, why?

They do. Almost 50% of all new cases of HIV infections in ireland this year were gay/bisexual men. Its because the easiest way for HIV infection to transmit is through the lining of the anus, and gay men have anal sex much more often than straight people.
Also gay men are many times more likely to have casual sex with strangers, of whom they knew nothing of their sexual history, than heterosexual people are.

frankoreagan

Protected sex is a very,very minimal risk, and even more so since you started PEP within 48 hours. The 4th gen duo tests they use in James and the Mater that test for HIV antibodies and the P24 antigen can give a very good indicator of infection at the 4 week post exposure mark. Doc in the Mater told me she'd never seen a 4 week negative turn positive, and that the recommendation for testing at 3 months to be conclusive is outdated, but one they have to follow. I wouldn't worry if I were you OP.

Annasopra

wakka12 wrote: »

Also gay men are many times more likely to have casual sex with strangers, of whom they knew nothing of their sexual history, than heterosexual people are.

Are they? Would be interested to see research or data on that

nozipcode

wakka12 wrote: »

They do. Almost 50% of all new cases of HIV infections in ireland this year were gay/bisexual men. Its because the easiest way for HIV infection to transmit is through the lining of the anus, and gay men have anal sex much more often than straight people.
Also gay men are many times more likely to have casual sex with strangers, of whom they knew nothing of their sexual history, than heterosexual people are.

I don't understand what you are saying, presuming your facts are correct.

You say more gay men (men who have sex with me) contract HIV than straight couples, but you then say 'almost 50% of new cases' are gay/bi men. Which would indicate than the greater majority of new cases are not gay/bi people. So which is it? In any case, it's not a huge majority on either side. I seen stats for it recently, I will try to pull them up and post.

wakka12

nozipcode wrote: »

I don't understand what you are saying, presuming your facts are correct.

You say more gay men (men who have sex with me) contract HIV than straight couples, but you then say 'almost 50% of new cases' are gay/bi men. Which would indicate than the greater majority of new cases are not gay/bi people. So which is it? In any case, it's not a huge majority on either side. I seen stats for it recently, I will try to pull them up and post.

Yes, most people who get HIV are straight. But HIV disproportionately affects lgbt men, seeing as they make up about 5% of the population, it means theyre about 10 times more likely to get it than a straight man. While they don't make up the majority of cases do you not find it shocking that such a small minority of the population makes up almost half of all new HIV infections?

So basically more straight people contract HIV than gay people but a gay man is many times more likely to contract HIV during his lifetime than a straight person. Does that answer your question?

Ten of Swords

nozipcode wrote: »

I don't understand what you are saying, presuming your facts are correct.

You say more gay men (men who have sex with me) contract HIV than straight couples, but you then say 'almost 50% of new cases' are gay/bi men. Which would indicate than the greater majority of new cases are not gay/bi people. So which is it? In any case, it's not a huge majority on either side. I seen stats for it recently, I will try to pull them up and post.

Stats for 2014, and a link to the HSE report. The MSM category is clearly the leader with 49% - a considerable margin over Heterosexuals who come in second at 33% of cases.

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057447154

J_E

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

Are they? Would be interested to see research or data on that

Whatever about generalising, given the wider availability of hookup apps and less social awkwardness between genders, I would bank on it.

nozipcode

wakka12 wrote: »

Yes, most people who get HIV are straight. But HIV disproportionately affects lgbt men, seeing as they make up about 5% of the population, it means theyre about 10 times more likely to get it than a straight man. While they don't make up the majority of cases do you not find it shocking that such a small minority of the population makes up almost half of all new HIV infections?

So basically more straight people contract HIV than gay people but a gay man is many times more likely to contract HIV during his lifetime than a straight person. Does that answer your question?

I now understand the point you were trying to make a little more, yes. Thank you.

Not so sure on your statistic of LGBT males only being 5% of the population. I could believe that for men who only have sex with other men (what people would typically call gay males), but I would be nearly certain that the percentage of MSM (gay males not excluding active bisexual and transgender males) is even larger than 5%.

wakka12

nozipcode wrote: »

I now understand the point you were trying to make a little more, yes. Thank you.

Not so sure on your statistic of LGBT males only being 5% of the population. I could believe that for men who only have sex with other men (what people would typically call gay males), but I would be nearly certain that the percentage of MSM (gay males not excluding active bisexual and transgender males) is even larger than 5%.

Well nobody knows for certain, I just said 5% for the sake of argument..most polls and surveys place the percentage of the male population who are not straight at about 3-8%...I very much doubt its any higher than 15% at the very most

Pride Before Ignorance

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

Are they? Would be interested to see research or data on that

Well I'm much more of a sl*t than my straight friends lol

Annasopra

Pride Before Ignorance wrote: »

Well I'm much more of a sl*t than my straight friends lol

yeah - so what :rolleyes:

Pride Before Ignorance

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

yeah - so what :rolleyes:

I'm just saying. My gay friends and I seem a bit more adventurous than my straight friends. I think it has to do with the fact that women are a bit more picky as they are hardwired to look for the best possible mate for their children. Just my theory, I accept that not everyone will subscribe to it.

I know this is not a scientific study, but can you show me a study that gay people are the same as or less promiscuous than straight people?

Pride Before Ignorance

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

yeah - so what :rolleyes:

I'm just saying. My gay friends and I seem a bit more adventurous than my straight friends. I think it has to do with the fact that women are a bit more picky as they are hardwired to look for the best possible mate to enable them to have the best possible offspring. Just my theory, I accept that not everyone will subscribe to it.

I know this is not a scientific study, but can you show me a study that gay people are the same as or less promiscuous than straight people?

jimdublin15

Pride Before Ignorance wrote: »

I'm just saying. My gay friends and I seem a bit more adventurous than my straight friends. I think it has to do with the fact that women are a bit more picky as they are hardwired to look for the best possible mate to enable them to have the best possible offspring. Just my theory, I accept that not everyone will subscribe to it.

Had to comment ill be honest personally I've always had more luck with women then men, Ive slept with more that's for sure i think they might just talk about it less. Would also depend on your friends I suppose. In my friend groups I would say it's about the same level of adventurousness, but that's a presumption at best.

Pride Before Ignorance wrote: »

I know this is not a scientific study, but can you show me a study that gay people are the same as or less promiscuous than straight people?

I think the linking of promiscuity as an increased risk in regards to HIV in the Gay/Bi sexual men it's perhaps a logical idea/conclusion then again there have been interesting studies that show other risk factors to consider:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/06/150610101114.htm
An international team of researchers from Europe and the US looked at HIV-related service use, need and behaviors among 175,000 gay or bisexual men living in 38 European countries with differing levels of national homophobia.
They found that men in homophobic countries had fewer sexual partners and were less likely to be diagnosed with HIV. However, they also found those men knew less about HIV, were less likely to use condoms and are at greater potential risk of getting HIV when they do have sex.

On the promiscuous not sure if there is a true scientific study with a large enough sample size, then again this survey in 2010 was under 4 million users but was a bit biased as it was a dating site. http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2010/oct/19/gay-men-promiscuous-myth

4 million members in order to help them find dates. The statistics are startling.
There is only a one percentage point difference between heterosexuals and homosexuals in their promiscuity: 98% of gay people have had 20 or fewer sexual partners; 99% of straight people have had the same number. Tellingly, OkCupid found that it is just 2% of gay people that are having 23% of the total reported gay sex.

wakka12

jimdublin15 wrote: »

Had to comment ill be honest personally I've always had more luck with women then men, Ive slept with more that's for sure i think they might just talk about it less. Would also depend on your friends I suppose. In my friend groups I would say it's about the same level of adventurousness, but that's a presumption at best.



I think the linking of promiscuity as an increased risk in regards to HIV in the Gay/Bi sexual men it's perhaps a logical idea/conclusion then again there have been interesting studies that show other risk factors to consider:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/06/150610101114.htm
An international team of researchers from Europe and the US looked at HIV-related service use, need and behaviors among 175,000 gay or bisexual men living in 38 European countries with differing levels of national homophobia.
They found that men in homophobic countries had fewer sexual partners and were less likely to be diagnosed with HIV. However, they also found those men knew less about HIV, were less likely to use condoms and are at greater potential risk of getting HIV when they do have sex.

On the promiscuous not sure if there is a true scientific study with a large enough sample size, then again this survey in 2010 was under 4 million users but was a bit biased as it was a dating site. http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2010/oct/19/gay-men-promiscuous-myth

4 million members in order to help them find dates. The statistics are startling.
There is only a one percentage point difference between heterosexuals and homosexuals in their promiscuity: 98% of gay people have had 20 or fewer sexual partners; 99% of straight people have had the same number. Tellingly, OkCupid found that it is just 2% of gay people that are having 23% of the total reported gay sex.

That 2% must make up a huge number of Grindr users then..Because Ive talked to a plenty of guys on there who are only 21-25 and have had as many as 50 or even more sexual partners in their short times on this earth

wakka12

jimdublin15 wrote: »

Had to comment ill be honest personally I've always had more luck with women then men, Ive slept with more that's for sure i think they might just talk about it less. Would also depend on your friends I suppose. In my friend groups I would say it's about the same level of adventurousness, but that's a presumption at best.



I think the linking of promiscuity as an increased risk in regards to HIV in the Gay/Bi sexual men it's perhaps a logical idea/conclusion then again there have been interesting studies that show other risk factors to consider:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/06/150610101114.htm
An international team of researchers from Europe and the US looked at HIV-related service use, need and behaviors among 175,000 gay or bisexual men living in 38 European countries with differing levels of national homophobia.
They found that men in homophobic countries had fewer sexual partners and were less likely to be diagnosed with HIV. However, they also found those men knew less about HIV, were less likely to use condoms and are at greater potential risk of getting HIV when they do have sex.

On the promiscuous not sure if there is a true scientific study with a large enough sample size, then again this survey in 2010 was under 4 million users but was a bit biased as it was a dating site. http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2010/oct/19/gay-men-promiscuous-myth

4 million members in order to help them find dates. The statistics are startling.
There is only a one percentage point difference between heterosexuals and homosexuals in their promiscuity: 98% of gay people have had 20 or fewer sexual partners; 99% of straight people have had the same number. Tellingly, OkCupid found that it is just 2% of gay people that are having 23% of the total reported gay sex.

Also , what counts as a sexual partner in this study? Are sexual encounters that didnt go beyond oral or other acts not counted ?

UnitedWeStand

worriedabouthiv wrote: »

I had sex with another man over 2 weeks ago. We met online. We used a condom. I performed oral on him with condom on, and he topped me with condom on. No one came. After the experience, I began to freak out (it was my first experience with another man) so I went to A & E. I told them I was worried about HIV and they eventually gave me PEP drugs which I have to take for a month. I since contacted the guy and he said he's clean, but he's never taken a HIV test. When I asked him if he would to put me out of my worry, he said no.

I'm out of my mind the past 2 weeks, stressed and worried. I know I'm probably low risk but there's still a small chance I could get HIV from him. My personal life is suffering from the anxiety. I have to wait 3 months after I finish the PEP drugs to get the all clear which is 3 and a half months away. I won't last that long. I don't know why I'm even writing this. I can;t tell anyone. Has anyone else ever thought they had HIV?

Here's a few things for you to know. I'll relay them to you from doing bio at uni a while ago, and taking a personal interest in STI's (I read a lot of journals, theres so much free information available on the web and through google scholar).

1) HIV is incredibly hard to catch. If you have unprotected vaginal sex with a female who is HIV positive, how easy do you think it is to catch? Simply placing the penis inside the vagina? 30 seconds of intercourse? Actually, the exposure rate, used in studies of couples with HIV positive partners dating negative partners, found the incidence is around one infection per 1,200 sessions of intercourse. You could have sex with a HIV positive female over 500 times and have a less than 50% chance of infection! And yet this is in the category of 'high risk'.

2) You used a condom. You are completely safe. No really, you are completely safe, its not a 99.5% thing, you are genuinely 100% safe. There is no need to worry at all based on the fact you had safe sex. In a lot of sexual health clinics they will tell you a test is pointless if you used a condom that was applied correctly and didn't come off during sex. However...

3)...However, clinics will often give people tests and provide PEP pills to help the patient feel 'relieved' (it actually makes them more nervous as it makes the situation more serious), but also because its a means to an end to get rid of the patient. I honestly do not have a clue why you are on PEP. For your situation there is no risk. Its not low risk, it is no risk. But perhaps it is protocol in the Irish medical system from the past where homosexuality was strongly linked with HIV due to the spread of the disease in the community during the 80's.

4) Even if you had no condom, oral sex is generally safe sex in regards to HIV transmission. Its only in freak situations that the disease is passed on here. This would include having bleeding gums, and then biting into the other persons genitals. Male to male oral is safe sex, male to female is more risky due to the fact females have menstrual bleeding. This is said to be risky if the other partner then has cuts on their gums to lips for potential blood to blood contact (even at this, it would be incredibly hard to pass on the virus).

Overall, really, you should not be worrying. The reason you are is because its HIV. It has the biggest social stigma of any disease. It hasn't got the 'glamour' of cancer which is a disease that you feel would garner pity. HIV feels like a disease that is a not only a death sentence but would cause social distress too. If it helps, I haven't met a friend who at some point hasn't freaked out post sex about not just contracting an STI, but HIV. Who honestly hasn't been there? The fact you're taking PEP pills is simply going to compound your anxiety too. You do not need PEP pills. If you had unprotected anal, I would recommend them as a precaution. You do not need them however.

UnitedWeStand

wakka12 wrote: »

I think almost every man has these horrible suspicions after their first same sex contact with another man...usually the suspicions are completely unfounded. And its mostly just good ol catholic guilt. Seriously the chances of you having HIV are like 0.01% so please stop worrying for you own sake, I was in the exact same position 6 months and was wracked with guilt and anxiety. Worst time of my life, affected my emotional and physical health and what do ya know..came up clean . HIV is a hard virus to catch, seriously. Please calm down.

To be fair, factoring in transmission rates of even male to male unprotected sex (which isn't even what the OP did)and the prevalence of HIV in homosexual men in Ireland, the percentage you would be looking at would be closer to 0.0001 - 0.00001%.

If you don't believe this to be true OP I can provide figures for you from the CDC and various sources if it makes you feel better! Good luck buddy in fighting your anxiety over this, it'll fade with time as does the emotional appeal of all thoughts. You're likely over the worst of your fears so far.

the_syco

wakka12 wrote: »

Also gay men are many times more likely to have casual sex with strangers, of whom they knew nothing of their sexual history, than heterosexual people are.

I'd wonder if it's more like "gay men are more likely to remember casual sex with strangers"? I know a fair few straight lads who are surprised that the woman they screwed the previous night was different in weight/hair colour/nationality, etc.

Could also be that men like sex, and there is not really a social stigma of a man having multiple partners. A woman liking sex has a stigma placed on her, and she'll be called a slut or "the town bike" by other women.

jimdublin15 wrote: »

They found that men in homophobic countries had fewer sexual partners and were less likely to be diagnosed with HIV. However, they also found those men knew less about HIV, were less likely to use condoms and are at greater potential risk of getting HIV when they do have sex.

Ignorance may be bliss, but it screws up the stats.

=-=

Other interesting general info here.

jimdublin15

the_syco wrote: »

Ignorance may be bliss, but it screws up the stats.

Until you have HIV that is.

jimdublin15

UnitedWeStand wrote: »

To be fair, factoring in transmission rates of even male to male unprotected sex (which isn't even what the OP did)and the prevalence of HIV in homosexual men in Ireland, the percentage you would be looking at would be closer to 0.0001 - 0.00001%.

If you don't believe this to be true OP I can provide figures for you from the CDC and various sources if it makes you feel better! Good luck buddy in fighting your anxiety over this, it'll fade with time as does the emotional appeal of all thoughts. You're likely over the worst of your fears so far.

His risk is basically if what the OP posted is correct and the it's the full story would indeed be near 0.

http://www.hpsc.ie/A-Z/EMIToolkit/appendices/app7.pdf

Risk of HiV transmission - source HiV status unknown
Receptive oral sex MSM 0.1x0.02%=0.002% Rounded up for if the source was HIV+ 1/50,000 (1/5000)

Risk of HIV transmission following an exposure from a known HIV-positive individual Estimated median (range) risk of HiV transmission per exposure (%)

You mentioned heterosexual partners contact and the risks.
Receptive vaginal intercourse 0.1 (0.004-0.32%)
insensitive vaginal intercourse 0.082 (0.011-0.38%).

So for partners and couples of mixed HIV status and unprotected contact. Indeed very low risk with a few if's and buts including medication adherence by the HIV+ Partner and 2 years of low Viral load readings. However overall the motto still is medication + condoms is the best route to go down.

http://www.aidsmap.com/No-one-with-an-undetectable-viral-load-gay-or-heterosexual-transmits-HIV-in-first-two-years-of-PARTNER-study/page/2832748/

PARTNER study principal investigator Dr Jens Lundgren pointed out that this meant that there was a maximum 5% chance that over a ten-year period, one in ten HIV-negative partners in a gay couple who had unprotected anal sex might acquire HIV; equally, though, it was more likely that their chance of acquiring HIV from their partner was nearer to zero, and indeed could be zero.

UnitedWeStand

jimdublin15 wrote: »

.

Yes exactly. The fear is far in excess of the reality of catching HIV, and perhaps its a healthy thing to an extent as it can lead to more prevention, but I do wonder how many unnecessery panic attacks, periods of anxiety and potentially worse outcomes come out the intense fear people get after sex due to the disease.

I wonder if it poses a danger of devaluing other sexual diseases too as they do pale in comparison next to the 'incurable, kiler hiv!'.

jimdublin15

UnitedWeStand wrote: »

Yes exactly. The fear is far in excess of the reality of catching HIV, and perhaps its a healthy thing to an extent as it can lead to more prevention, but I do wonder how many unnecessery panic attacks, periods of anxiety and potentially worse outcomes come out the intense fear people get after sex due to the disease.

I wonder if it poses a danger of devaluing other sexual diseases too as they do pale in comparison next to the 'incurable, kiler hiv!'.

Yeah, I often speak to people who are waiting for test results and instead of testing or worrying about other STI's and the path that lead them to being scared of HIV in the first place they just focus on the HIV and once confirmed negative you see them going back to the same old behavior that caused the scare the first time round. :-(

Fear is normal in relation to danger, in the sense that rational fear keeps us safe from doing daft stuff, it's human nature. However fear can also be irrational or counter productive a point I've tried to highlight before with regards to HIV.

jimdublin15 wrote: »

Okay I answered but you made me think about this point.
So I think the scare and shock/fear campaigns cause denial and reduce testing, that what i think and I thought about it some more and starting reading up on the topic. I do still believe the same, it was useful back in the day but the scare and fear campaigns are no longer effective.

Still I do thank you for making me think about it, and I mean that.

Seems very little evidence either way for modern day effect of shock/fear campaigns except for some items that mention it in passing so I did want to highlight the below, call it food for thought.

http://www.aidsmap.com/More-on-programmes-using-threat/page/1768332/
There has been little research on whether threats work in HIV-prevention messages.
What studies have been done show that people are aroused emotionally by fearful images and remember the advertisements more, but the evidence on efficacy is contradictory. In some cases there is evidence that an awareness campaign using a frightening image was followed by an increase in risk behaviour. One such was an Australian campaign featuring AIDS as the Grim Reaper.

http://caps.ucsf.edu/archives/factsheets/stigma
HIV testing. Fear of negative social consequences of a positive HIV test result can deter some persons from getting tested. A study of men and women in seven cities in the US found that stigma was associated with a decreased likelihood of being tested for HIV. People who are HIV+ but haven’t tested and don’t know they are HIV+ are less likely to try to prevent transmitting HIV to others.
Safer behaviors. Some HIV+ persons may fear that disclosing their HIV status or using condoms may bring partner rejection, limit sexual opportunities or increase risk for physical and sexual violence. A study of rural men who have sex with men (MSM), found that men who thought health care providers in their community were intolerant of HIV+ persons, also reported more high-risk sexual behaviors.


http://www.aidsmap.com/BHIVA-Fear-of-stigma-and-discrimination-prevent-Africans-from-testing-for-HIV-in-the-UK/page/1423468/
BHIVA: Fear of stigma and discrimination prevent Africans from testing for HIV in the UK
Fear of stigma and discrimination are preventing Africans in the United Kingdom from testing for HIV, according to a qualitative study presented to the Twelfth Annual
Conference of the British HIV Association in Brighton on March 30st. Although investigators found that a high proportion of individuals participating in the
study were willing to undergo anonymous oral HIV testing, they also established that almost half of all individuals had never had an HIV test, and that a significant number of
individuals participating in the study had undiagnosed HIV infection.

http://www.cdc.gov/nchhstp/newsroom/docs/HIVFactSheets/Challenges-508.pdf
Some are concerned that other people will find out that they have tested positive (or that they sought testing at
all), although testing is completely confidential.
Some may avoid testing simply because they are afraid their test will be positive.

http://www.sigmaresearch.org.uk/files/MiC-briefing-1-Fear.pdf
“Inducing fear is not an effective way to promote previous HIV relevant learning or condom use either immediately following the intervention or later on.
However, HIV counselling and testing can provide an outlet for previous HIV-related anxiety and,subsequently, gains in both knowledge and behaviour
change immediately and longitudinally.” (Earl & Albarracin 2007

http://www.sigmaresearch.org.uk/files/MiC-briefing-1-Fear.pdf
Key 5 points: THE ROLE OF FEAR IN HIV PREVENTION:
Fear arousing imagery can be good at attracting
attention and is often memorable.
• Fear-based campaigns are more persuasive for
individuals who are already engaging in the desired,
health-protective, behaviour.
• Arousing fear in individuals can have many unintended
consequences, such as denial or othering.
• Most homosexually active men are already fearful
of HIV.
• Arousing fear is not an effective means of facilitating
sexual behaviour change.

http://www.aidsmap.com/Facilitators-and-barriers-to-testing/page/2821913/
The stigma associated with HIV infection is identified as a barrier to testing in all populations, but especially so in black African communities. People fear exclusion and social isolation as consequences of being diagnosed with HIV. Many people associate HIV with promiscuity or unfaithfulness, and see themselves as being at very low risk of infection
While many people test in order to eliminate the uncertainty of not knowing their HIV status, others may respond to uncertainty with denial – for example, through assessing their own behaviours in a way that minimises the possibility of an HIV-positive status. Individuals may fear that discovery of an HIV-positive status would mean facing difficult decisions and responsibilities, especially in relation to sexual partners.

Hmm just as a note, sorry to the OP for going somewhat off topic. I hope you doing okay and that some of the great points made on the thread have been helpful and/or somewhat reassuring, at the very least I hope it's been educational.

UnitedWeStand

jimdublin15 wrote: »

Fear is normal in relation to danger, in the sense that rational fear keeps us safe from doing daft stuff, it's human nature. However fear can also be irrational or counter productive a point I've tried to highlight before with regards to HIV.

Exactly. And the best thing is it can prevent you from making the same mistakes you did that lead up the incident that caused the fear.