Ready to book, NO clue what to do first!

ShaShaBear

Okay, we're ready to book. Have an appointment with our preferred venue next Tuesday to go over package and whatnot.
We want a civil wedding, in this venue. Approval should be no issue, there's been three civil weddings there in the past few months.
There is only one registrar in my area.

The general impression I get from what I read is that I make an appointment with this registrar themselves, book them for a date in my venue, and also book the venue, then register intent to marry with the HSE office at least three months before the wedding date chosen.
But other things I read suggest I have to make an appointment with the HSE office to book the wedding with the registrar. The problem I'm having here is who the HELL do I book with first? My venue is the only one in the town I live, and so is extremely popular with the locals.

How do I make sure venue and registrar are on the same page and officially agreeing to the same date?

(Also, mixed info again, does anyone know if civil weddings can be performed in an approved venue other than the registry office on a Friday?)

traprunner

Yes you can get married at an approved venue from Monday to Friday. Make sure the date is available with the venue and the. Have your meeting with the registrar. Even a quick phone call with the registrar might be an idea to make sure they are available on the date you want. I wouldn't pay a deposit to the venue until you know both them and the registrar are available on the same date.

ShaShaBear

traprunner wrote: »

Yes you can get married at an approved venue from Monday to Friday. Make sure the date is available with the venue and the. Have your meeting with the registrar. Even a quick phone call with the registrar might be an idea to make sure they are available on the date you want. I wouldn't pay a deposit to the venue until you know both them and the registrar are available on the same date.

So provisionally pick a date with the venue and then ring the registrar themselves and ask them if they are free? The good news is we aren't fussy on a date. Simply a month and a preferred day of the week!

traprunner

ShaShaBear wrote: »

So provisionally pick a date with the venue and then ring the registrar themselves and ask them if they are free? The good news is we aren't fussy on a date. Simply a month and a preferred day of the week!

That's the way we did it and it worked out fine. I'm sure that the venue would change the date for you but it's probably better to get a list of available dates from them and compare it to a list of available dates from the registrar and then pick the day that suits you.

ShaShaBear

traprunner wrote: »

That's the way we did it and it worked out fine. I'm sure that the venue would change the date for you but it's probably better to get a list of available dates from them and compare it to a list of available dates from the registrar and then pick the day that suits you.

Thanks, I figured that would make most sense, but was afraid I'd up accidentally committing to something on one end and not realising it doesn't add up on the other
I swear to crust, I have the whole bloody thing organised, even down to dresses. Booking it is by far the most difficult!

traprunner

ShaShaBear wrote: »

Thanks, I figured that would make most sense, but was afraid I'd up accidentally committing to something on one end and not realising it doesn't add up on the other
I swear to crust, I have the whole bloody thing organised, even down to dresses. Booking it is by far the most difficult!

The date is probably the most stressful part. Everything just falls into place after that. I found the registrar in the HSE was great to deal with and very flexible and worked around our times. She was very professional too and put us at ease.

Good luck with your wedding

ShaShaBear

traprunner wrote: »

The date is probably the most stressful part. Everything just falls into place after that. I found the registrar in the HSE was great to deal with and very flexible and worked around our times. She was very professional too and put us at ease.

Good luck with your wedding

That's what I'm hoping for. Someone who would just take me by the hand and lead me through it like a 5 year old on a school trip :P

traprunner

Too many people get stressed about organising weddings. The venue do so much that the only things left to do are probably:
Band
Registrar
Cars
Dresses
Suits
Favours
Flowers
Invitations
Photographer
Table plan

I might have forgotten something but organising a wedding is not that difficult. Get as much sorted early and that's the main part of the battle. The seating plan can be a pain due to people pulling out at the last minute. I had to redo a couple of tables the day before due to sick relatives.

traprunner

Expect the main stress to come from family members. Stupid things like 'X doesn't eat this or that' when it comes to the menu. Remember it's your day, not theirs. Do t let them get to you.

ShaShaBear

traprunner wrote: »

Expect the main stress to come from family members. Stupid things like 'X doesn't eat this or that' when it comes to the menu. Remember it's your day, not theirs. Do t let them get to you.

Wedding is only 60 people, and 14 of them are immediate family. There is one medical coeliac and three veggies, after that tough skitz :P
We've got the meal picked, the venue picked, the photographer just wants our date so we can book, videographer the same, going to see the band at the end of this month and hoping they have whatever date we end up with, we're not getting cars (I will be getting ready in my mum's which is literally a 45 second walk to the venue, so OH's dad is driving me and my bridesmaids up in the Octavia :pac: ), I'm making my own crochet bouquets for something different, a very close friend that makes favours as a business is doing ours, I'm doing my own invitations (have printed two or three, just have to decide on final template) and I have gotten the bridesmaid dresses already.

All that's left is a table plan, my dress (I'm pregnant currently so won't even be looking for one until after I have baby in December, not planning to get married until the following September!) and the registrar!

Trilogy

Op, I know our hotel held the date for us for about a week, so if all had gone belly up it would have been OK.

All you might need is a day or two to confirm with the registrar so it shouldn't be an issue. If they verbally confirm that they'd hold a date and you're worried, just pop it in an email to the wedding Co - ordinator (something along the lines of "Many thanks for agreeing to provisionally hold our wedding date until I can confirm with the registrar. I am hopeful to have confirmation by x date. Shall we schedule to meet again on x date to sign contacts and place our deposit?" ) Shows you're organised and serious and sets up a paper trail.


Good luck!

ShaShaBear

Does an appointment with the registrar usually take very long? Should I be contacting the registrar themselves privately or through the registering intent to marry?
I could probably ring the HSE and ask them, but if their phone info is like their online info, I feel as though I'll be none the wiser!

alwaysadub

We're in the same boat! Went down yesterday to the hotel to book after making appointment weeks ago to be told she's out sick, no one informed us! Which isn't a great start.
Anyway what we were planning on doing was getting the hotel to hold a date( they'll hold one for 14 days without a deposit needed) and try get hold of the registrar within that two weeks to see if they've the same date free. Never thought of trying to get a few dates from hotel but its a good idea! Might do that myself

ShaShaBear

alwaysadub wrote: »

We're in the same boat! Went down yesterday to the hotel to book after making appointment weeks ago to be told she's out sick, no one informed us! Which isn't a great start.
Anyway what we were planning on doing was getting the hotel to hold a date( they'll hold one for 14 days without a deposit needed) and try get hold of the registrar within that two weeks to see if they've the same date free. Never thought of trying to get a few dates from hotel but its a good idea! Might do that myself

Well we've no significant dates in mind. We just know that we didn't want it in December or July, as that will mean an anniversary and a child's birthday. February and November are our birthdays, and we didn't want that either!
We want good enough weather, so August or September seemed like the best choices, and my chosen photographer is booked through August, so September it is :pac:

Gatica

Usually a venue will hold a date for you for about 2 weeks. Use that time to find out whether the registrar is available for your date. You'll find they're often booked out well in advance for more popular days like Fridays, so you're better off getting their availability ASAP.