Homesick in Oz :(

OpalReturns

Hi guys....

Just feeling a bit down today. I've been living in Sydney with my boyf for 2 years now and I love it here. It's so beautiful and we have a great lifestyle.

But I miss my family so much

My aunt died a couple of months ago. I'll never forget my mother ringing me at 2am to tell me. You know something bad has happened when your mam rings you in the middle of the night...so went home for funeral. I've never felt so guilty getting on the flight to come back to Oz. Leaving my grieving family behind me, I left them when they needed me most. Anyways since that happened, I just really want to be at home with my family.

I talked to my boyf about this and we agreed we'd give it another year in Oz. I'm happy with this as it means we can save some money for home, and do a bit more travelling before settling down in Ireland

Problem is, I think he's just saying that to keep me happy. I know he does really want to go home, but realistically I can't see it happening. He works in construction and has no qualifications. He won't be able to get a job at home I'm an accountant so I think I'd be able to find a job ok

I know 1000's of Irish people face this dilemma.....stay in Australia and only see your family every couple of years but have a great lifestyle...or go home and have your partner be on the dole & struggle financially

I'm not looking for answers....as I know the answer is to just suck it up and go home when things pick up. But what if they never pick up and my boyf can never get a job at home he is such a hard worker....going home and being on the dole would not be an option for him

Anyways just wanted to rant. Thanks for listening guys

beks101

Hi OP,

If you have at least another year before heading back, can't your boyfriend spend that year working towards securing something for when he gets to Ireland?

Whether it's applying for a course that will give him better qualifications and a better chance of employment at home, and saving to afford that in the mean time, or just throwing out job applications left right and centre to suss out his options?

I know employment opportunities aren't going to be as plentiful in Ireland as they would be Down Under, but it certainly isn't the quagmire that people paint it to be - I'm constantly hearing of friends and acquaintances starting new jobs etc - and he won't know what's out there for him until he casts a close eye.

Overall, my advice would be, if you feel in your gut that you'd like to be closer to your family - do not no matter what, ignore that. It's one of those things you WILL live to regret down the line. You only get one family and they are irreplaceable, as you are keenly aware.

silverfeather

Have a chat with the BF. I know nothing about the construction industry etc. Talk in depth and realistically about it. Homesickness waxes and wanes. But Beks is correct I have seen others be away from family etc while they are ill or aging it's complicated.

I have thought I would like to live away for a while. More in the EU though. But it makes you think.

stickyfinger

It would be worth looking into getting citizenship in Oz before leaving if you can, at least then you have the choice to go back if you do decide to leave. Many emigrants find that they miss home, and their family and friends are often telling them that they should come home, but then when they arrive back things aren't the same, obviously, but it comes as a shock to many as they expect to fit back into their old life and that does not happen. Friends and family are living their own lives, they've moved on and are doing their own thing.

Just saying, you should live where you want to live and where you are enjoying life, the grass is always greener, and if you really like Oz you should try make sure you can still go back. People equally regret not coming back but also regret moving back, you can come back anytime, it's harder to leave again.

iusedtoknow

If you take a browse around the australia forum, there are a lot of people who made the move back, and are regretting it and looking to move back to Australia again.

I've been away from Ireland for 8 years, and still get pangs of homesickness every now and then - sounds stupid but I miss the rain and the smell of the countryside. However, I have spent varying degrees of time back (from a weekend to 4 weeks during a death in the family) and while the shorter visits have been great in catching up with people over dinner or in a pub, I realized that life had to go on. My friends bills were going up, salaries stagnating and the treat of dinner was just that - eventually I realized that everyone had day to day life that my being back wasn't going to change that.

Perhaps as mentioned above, you should look into waiting for citizenship to come your way - you can then make a choice to go back for a few years, and also be able to pick up in australia if you feel like it