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Let friend down. No contact from them.

  • 07-05-2015 10:44am
    #1
    TLOA72
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 123 ✭✭


    Hi.
    Feel free to bash.
    I let a mate down recently as I told them I would do an activity with them but went and did it with someone else. I had hoped that I could do it with both but time constraints didn't allow me so I just was a selfish so and so and did it anyway.
    They told me that they are very annoyed with me and I regretted it even as I was doing it.
    The thing is I have apologised and said I was a sh1t for doing it and hope that they would forgive me but no response. I understand it's up to them now if they want to remain friends but it's really eating me up. Any advice?


Comments

  • #2
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,217 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    Better place for your post here TLOA72. Good luck.

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



  • #3
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Ask what you can do to make amends, so they know the apology means something. If they dont respond there is nothing you can do but keep the lines of communication open and hope that perhaps time heals.


  • #4
    Stavro Mueller
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,673 ✭✭✭Stavro Mueller


    I'm not going to bash you but if I was your friend I'd not necessarily want to stay friends either. You promised them you'd do this activity then you effectively stood them up. If they'd known in time they could've got someone else instead. Did your actions mean they had to cancel their plans or scrabble around trying to found someone else? Did it leave them in an awkward position?

    Hopefully in time your friend will overcome their anger and hurt but for now I'd afford them some space. What you did to them has probably led them to reevaluating the friendship. By going off with this other person you were effectively saying this person is more important to me than you.


  • #5
    Milly33
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,658 ✭✭✭Milly33


    Well at least you admitted to it, but I wouldn't go off if they forgive you and do it again...

    I would randomly turn up at their house with what beer or bunch of flowers and apologize again face to face and say looks sorry just crap got caught up with me and I made the wrong choice...

    It takes a lot to apologize do this and then let the ball in their court if they are that good a friend they will forgive you


  • #6
    TLOA72
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 123 ✭✭TLOA72


    Met yesterday and reconciled. Told them I was very sorry and won't ever do it again.
    Big weight off my shoulders.


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  • #7
    Stavro Mueller
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,673 ✭✭✭Stavro Mueller


    Good for you! Just be careful though - it may take a while for your friendship to recover from this. I know you weren't being malicious. It was poor judgement and perhaps a bit of trying to be all things to all men. It will have shaken your friend's faith in you though so don't buy at face value their forgiveness.


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