Weddings Abroad

shel22

Hi,
My fiancee and i are considering eloping to get married. we have just bought a house, have two children under two and are together a long time so we just want to get married in a stress free and more intimate way and we feel going abroad on our own might be the best option for us. We had planned on doing a traditional wedding here but from talking to others it seems very costly and stressful.
Has anyone any advice on getting married abroad? Location? Costs? Should we bring our children?
Thanks so much for your help!

lazygal

Before you commit to a wedding abroad I'd consider having a small civil ceremony here with two witnesses. Costs €200 and is completely stress free. If you're tight for money I think its the way to go. Is there a particular reason you want to get married abroad?

shel22

lazygal wrote: »

Before you commit to a wedding abroad I'd consider having a small civil ceremony here with two witnesses. Costs €200 and is completely stress free. If you're tight for money I think its the way to go. Is there a particular reason you want to get married abroad?

Thanks for the advice something to consider!
No particular reason only i thought it might be stress free but do u know can it be stressful and expensive going abroad?

lazygal

Well, it'll cost more than €200 and require more organisation for a start going abroad! Then you have the issue of family perhaps not being too impressed to be left out of the whole thing, of course that's up to you. I've done the big day and prior to that the small quick legal ceremony with only our parents present (our mums were our witnesses), after which we went for a meal. Job done and even though we chose to have a big day afterwards, it wasn't essential.

I've attended weddings abroad because the couple didn't want the hassle of the 'Irish wedding' but I think if the couples had simply done the civil ceremony only route here they've have saved themselves (and their guests) the hassle of trundling away foreign for something you can do here.

westernlass

wedding planners start at 1000 euro and you are looking at a normal budget to go with that for a comparable wedding here. There's not really that much to be saved going abroad, it's that you keep numbers down. You don't get any presents either as people are paying their flights so overall it can be more costly.

Milly33

I know a chap who got married in Spain and he said it was lovely and that but you still end up spending the money if you are talking having a few people there.

If not if it is just you and the hubbie to be and kids then it will probably cost the same as a small holiday...

If you are looking for the hassle free route then like other say have the ceremony in the registry office and then go for a nice meal or the pub even. You can make it all as hassle stress free as you like, you just need to have definite wants and not wants and stick to them

MistyCheese

shel22 wrote: »

we just want to get married in a stress free and more intimate way and we feel going abroad on our own might be the best option for us.

Sounds like you won't be throwing a party for 20 and are more into going on a holiday and returning married. It can be done but it can be awkward, red-tape wise, in Europe. Depending on the country you'll need Apostle stamps, you'll need all your documents translated, some countries require one of you to be resident for a number of days before you marry. Only the two of you can decide if it's worth the bit of hassle and money. You also have to consider if you're going to hire a photographer and if you're going to wear a traditional wedding dress, and if so, getting it there (and back) and if it'll wrinkle in transit.

In America there are some states where you can just show up with your passports and marry on the day (not just Navada either) or after three days. But America is probably a bit far on a budget.

jamesbondings

[SNIP]

Anyway I was only talking about this with my Dad yesterday.

The only reason at the moment i wont ask my partner to marry me is the costs associated with the wedding we want (normal irish wedding)

My Dad is married to a spanish lady and got married over there. He was saying if we booked a hotel (that specialize in weddings) we could save a fortune. He was saying that a night in a hotel the whole day in terms of food (and free bar) dj the whole job lot can be done for 50-90 per head depending on what you want exactly! He said you dont even have to get married in Ireland first like i thought you do, besides it also means you dont have to pay for those unlikely to attend a foreign wedding anyways.

We might have a wedding here, if that was the case there would have to be upwards of 200 guests which (for me) is far too expensive. However go to Spain those numbers could be knocked down to 40 or 50, out of those 40-50 that we would assume would go some obviously wouldnt be able to make the trip etc, taking our numbers (and costs) down further!

Now im sold on the idea......just have to sell her on the idea lol.

sillysocks

It probably depends a lot of the actual venue but be careful assuming you'll save a fortune. We got married in Spain with 80 guests and it still cost us a small fortune. Things like dresses, bridesmaids dresses, rings, suits etc are all set price regardless of if its here or abroad. We found the nicer hotels where we were looking were actually more expensive than set menus here - although they probably included more in the set price like wine, better food, free bar for a while etc. So we felt like we got better quality but not any cheaper really.
You can only get legally married over there if you do a catholic church ceremony, you can't legally marry in a civil ceremony (think you have to be living there a few months first or something to do it that way).
Hope that helps. Pm if you like!

jamesbondings wrote: »

[SNIP]
Anyway I was only talking about this with my Dad yesterday.

The only reason at the moment i wont ask my partner to marry me is the costs associated with the wedding we want (normal irish wedding)

My Dad is married to a spanish lady and got married over there. He was saying if we booked a hotel (that specialize in weddings) we could save a fortune. He was saying that a night in a hotel the whole day in terms of food (and free bar) dj the whole job lot can be done for 50-90 per head depending on what you want exactly! He said you dont even have to get married in Ireland first like i thought you do, besides it also means you dont have to pay for those unlikely to attend a foreign wedding anyways.

We might have a wedding here, if that was the case there would have to be upwards of 200 guests which (for me) is far too expensive. However go to Spain those numbers could be knocked down to 40 or 50, out of those 40-50 that we would assume would go some obviously wouldnt be able to make the trip etc, taking our numbers (and costs) down further!

Now im sold on the idea......just have to sell her on the idea lol.

stickybookmark

shel22 wrote: »

Hi,
My fiancee and i are considering eloping to get married. we have just bought a house, have two children under two and are together a long time so we just want to get married in a stress free and more intimate way and we feel going abroad on our own might be the best option for us. We had planned on doing a traditional wedding here but from talking to others it seems very costly and stressful.
Has anyone any advice on getting married abroad? Location? Costs? Should we bring our children?
Thanks so much for your help!

I think it's a great idea! Do it !! Might be easier to let the kids here for a long weekend with grandparents and say ye're just getting a little holiday to yourselves. Head over to Spain or Italy and get the job done - nice little ornate church, no-one there only yourselves & the priest. Sort whatever paperwork needs to be sorted to make it happen - however much 'hassle' it is to do that, it couldn't compare with the hassle of a full blown wedding!!!!

ABajaninCork

Milly33 wrote: »

You can make it all as hassle stress free as you like, you just need to have definite wants and not wants and stick to them

This is the only thing you should keep in mind, OP!

Good luck!!

Peregrinus

There's no inherent connection between (a) a wedding abroad, and (b) a small, quiet, inexpensive, stress-free wedding. You can have a small, quiet, etc wedding in Ireland, or a massive binge abroad.

Where the two intersect is where a couple decide to go abroad in order to reduce the numbers attending. They reckon that fewer people will accept any invitation offered, or that people will be less upset at not being invited if the wedding is abroad than if it is at home.

Ask yourself, OP, whether your wider family and friends will be upset if you have a low-key wedding in Ireland, and they are not invited? If the answer is "no", then marry in Ireland. If the answer is "yes", then ask yourself the further question of whether they would be less upset if they are not invited to a low-key wedding abroad. If the answer to that question is "yes" then, and only then, should you consider a wedding abroad.

etymon

Hi OP
Me and other half doing same thing. We booked 12 days in a 5 star all inclusive luxury resort in Jamaica - very easy to get married on the beach for a small fee in the Caribbean and seems like there are plenty of excursions etc away from the resort, relaxing and beach etc. We are going to do registry office before we leave for the family (200 quid). The holiday cost about 1000 euro less simply by booking it on Thomson UK instead of via an Irish travel agent and they charge 250USD to marry you when you get there.

Funny everyone we have said to who is married has breathed a large sigh and said 'believe me you're doing it right'. ;-)

jennyhayes123

We got married in Gibraltar. Highly recommend it. It was easy organise, had a lovely day, just me my husband and kids. I would have left them but family didn't agree so wouldn't mind them for us. It didn't cost much more than our usual family holiday. People get to caught up in there wedding days where I was more into the rest of our lives!!!
My only regret is had we known it was so easy to do and not expensive we could have done it years ago like we wanted to. Gibraltar is a very easy no bull**** way to get married with the same results