When to start primary school

ver2

Sorry this question has probably been asked over and over but I am hoping for some advice. I have a child born on January 2nd and wonder if it is best to start them at 4 years and 8/9 months or wait till they are nearer 6.

She has gone to creche since the age of 2 and is starting preschool (in creche) this september (will be 4 in following january). She seems clever enough but not sure about maturity.

My first child so I don't really know what the norm should be.

Any advice greatly welcomed.

jopax

Hi op, am glad you asked this question as I am curious myself as to what is best.
From my own personal experience, my first child was going to be 5 in Feb when we sent her, so she was 4 1\2.
I so wish I had waited as she was no where near ready for school.
Academically no problems, the big problem I found was she was so innocent & a lot of the girls were older and could pick up on her innocence so to speak.
I think there was a couple of reasons for this, she was an only child at the time, we live in the countryside so she was not used to playing outside with her peers.
Like yours she had been in playschool at 2, so I didn't think it would be a big jump for her but it was.
She is now in 2nd class & is so clued in now, I have no worries in that regard thankfully, but the first couple of years she was that bit more vulnerable.
I have another daughter with a birthday in Feb also and am like you I'm not sure when to send her.
I think she would be ready at that age as her sister has her toughened up but I am still in two minds on it.

ver2

thanks jopax,

It is hard to know as you said I don't want to send her when she is vulnerable and ruin the experience initially for her. The reason why I am a little caught is that I went to school when I was nearly 6. My family moved back from England and even though i had attended school in the UK they decided to start me all over again. I really hated being the oldest in my class, particularly when it came to secondary school.

So there you go!!

Did the creche give you any feedback before sending your first daughter. Is the feedback different for your second daughter. I didn't think it was such a big deal but then I started really thinking about it. I would gladly keep her with me for as long as I could but didn't want her to be stuck with being one of the older ones but maybe she would be better off.

Thanks again, let me know if you figure it out. Although it sounds like your second daughter would be less vulnerable.

dooroy

I think that at 4yrs and 8 mths she would be fine for starting primary school - especially as she will have experience of creche etc
You also have to consider that if she will be spending 8 yrs in primary and if she is almost 6 when she starts she will be about thirteen and a half finishing primary and then if she does TY in secondary she will be nineteen and a half finishing secondary.
Once they reach the age of twelve to twelve and a half most primary school children feel it's time to be off to secondary.
There is no easy answer but I think children are very good at adapting to the school way of life - some of course are better than others , but being older may not be the answer ; a lot can depend on the other children in the class also.
And remember that children are not 'small adults '; this can cause parents worry as a child's description of an event can be very different to how an adult would describe it .

ver2

Thanks dooroy.

I guess I was originally just thinking about the age that she would hit secondary school at and also if she needed to repeat a year etc. Points that you have brought up dooroy.

But most primary schools seem to push for the child to be 5 which is great if your child is born in august etc. When I was talking to the creche about her starting preschool, it felt like they didn't entirely approve. I didn't know if there was an agenda and maybe they had too many number or what but most of the kids in the class are in same age bracket (bar a few months). She can count, do the alphabet, is potty trained etc but she certainly can't read or write.

I was told that at primary school these days that they quickly learn to read and write in a matter of a few months of starting. Is this the case?

Thanks again for getting back to me. Didn't want to think about it before as feel very lonely when I think of her heading off to school but I do need to do what is best for her and not me. I do work part time so need to consider our options.

Thanks again

jopax

Hi ver2, no I never got any negative feedback from the playschool, having said that I was unaware of how important the last year was to prepare them for school. It was a very small playschool & all ages were mixed in together.


I won't be sending my next there, she will get better preparation in a preschool which is literally geared to get them ready for school.

I know what you mean about being the eldest, I don't know if I'd want that for mine either.

Will there be children that are in her preschool that will be going to the same primary.? I would consider that as a bonus if she knew someone.

byhookorbycrook

Repeating a class in primary, unless the child has a very strong learning difficulty is no longer as easy as it was, the DES do not consider immaturity as a good reason. There is no guarantee transition year will even be running when she gets that far so don't count on that either.

For many children the "academic" side is the easy part of starting school, it's social and emotional sides you need to consider too.That said I've encountered children that parents feel are way ahead of junior infants because they can count to 20, where they are actually just repeating words that don't mean anything to them. I've also come across children who think lmnop is one letter of the alphabet and take a lot of convincing otherwise!

Can she share in a group?Does she take turns?Does she persist with tasks? How are her motor skills? Does she listen to and follow instructions easily? Can she work without an adult right beside her every single second? Does she manage bathroom, putting her coat etc. on alone?Could she hold her own in a group of 30 with just one adult, parents often get a land when a child goes from such a small group per adult in pre-school to 30 (and sometimes more) to on teacher?

The above is not exhaustive, more a few questions get you thinking.Each child is different and I have never met parents who regretted sending a child older, but plenty who regretted sending a younger child to primary.

afkasurfjunkie

jopax wrote: »

Hi ver2, no I never got any negative feedback from the playschool, having said that I was unaware of how important the last year was to prepare them for school. It was a very small playschool & all ages were mixed in together.


I won't be sending my next there, she will get better preparation in a preschool which is literally geared to get them ready for school.

I know what you mean about being the eldest, I don't know if I'd want that for mine either.

Will there be children that are in her preschool that will be going to the same primary.? I would consider that as a bonus if she knew someone.

How do you mean a preschool which is literally geared to getting them ready for school?
Preschool should concentrate on learning through play, helping them to learn to put on their own coats and play and share with other children. There's no need for them to do formal reading and writing.

blackbird 49

It really depends on the child, I think it is better to be near the 5 than the 4, my own child was 4 in the February and I sent him he had no problems, you might find that if you decide not to send her till nearer 6 it means another year at play school and she might find it boring, she still has another year and a bit and you would be surprised how much a child changes and be ready for school, I've seen it for myself with my niece the difference a year made to her, she is for school this year,

jopax

afkasurfjunkie wrote: »

How do you mean a preschool which is literally geared to getting them ready for school?
Preschool should concentrate on learning through play, helping them to learn to put on their own coats and play and share with other children. There's no need for them to do formal reading and writing.

What I meant is learning all the things you've mentioned & they will teach them ABC' s and numbers.
They also teach them how to hold a pencil properly, and take a roll call.
I know they don't teach anything more, I'm just comparing it to where my first daughter went, they did none of that with her.
I didn't realise at the time how important all the little things are.

byhookorbycrook

ABCs/ Numbers are the work of Junior Infants, a play school is MEANT to be play, does the school do Aistear?

ver2

Actually the creche my daughter attends implements Aistear. She adores the place. Her speech and concentration have improved since she started and we are really happy with the place. If I felt the environment wasn't stimulating, if she wasn't painting, learning songs, playing games that had an educational base then I would probably change where she was as well.

Thanks for all the views and opinions, they do really help. She will be doing preschool so I guess I will see how she preforms with her peers. I live in the countryside so luckily the class sizes won't be that big but having said that I will take advice from the creche and won't let her enter the school system unless she is ready.

I do appreciate that parents sometimes regret putting their kids into school too early. I, however was a very bored nearly 6 year old starting and personally speaking I do sometimes think you can start some children too late. I really should have been moved into a higher class. It seems that while the system is slow to allow your child repeat, it also slow to move them up a level if it is needed. But all kids are different and as said some develop faster than others.

Thanks again and I do appreciate everyone taking the time to give me your views and opinions. You have all really helped.

jopax

I'm sure you will make the right decision for your daughter, the very fact that your considering the pros and con's is very positive.

Its something that I didn't do, it never even entered my head whether she was fully ready for school, you live and learn I suppose anyway.

You mentioned that her speech had come on also which is a plus.

When my daughter started the teacher recommended a speech therapist for her as she felt she needed help with certain words too.

These were things I only discovered once she started school, had I known before I could have worked with her on it.

You are obviously very aware of her development, whilst I was oblivious to where she should have been.

Best of luck with it.

the goon

Sorry to hijack thread but could really do with some advice. My son turned 3 at the end of May. He has been going to a Montessori 3 afternoons a week since last September. Our plan all along was to send him to school in September 2017 , when he would be 5 yrs 3 months old.

That said, the Montessori is recommending he do the preschool year this year and go to primary school next year (at 4 yrs 3 months old). They say his attention etc is very good, and they think he will be ready. They also say if at the end of this year their assessment has changed, they will let us know.

Personally, I am conflicted. He has very good concentration etc, has been potty trained since before he turned two, but, when in comparison to his sister who is starting school this September at 4 yrs 9 months, he seems so immature.

My big fear is if he starts next year he won't be mature enough, but if we don't start him, we are holding him back and he will end up bored ( essentially having done 3 years of montesorri).

Any advice would be really appreciated.

Moonbeam

the goon wrote: »

Sorry to hijack thread but could really do with some advice. My son turned 3 at the end of May. He has been going to a Montessori 3 afternoons a week since last September. Our plan all along was to send him to school in September 2017 , when he would be 5 yrs 3 months old.

That said, the Montessori is recommending he do the preschool year this year and go to primary school next year (at 4 yrs 3 months old). They say his attention etc is very good, and they think he will be ready. They also say if at the end of this year their assessment has changed, they will let us know.

Personally, I am conflicted. He has very good concentration etc, has been potty trained since before he turned two, but, when in comparison to his sister who is starting school this September at 4 yrs 9 months, he seems so immature.

My big fear is if he starts next year he won't be mature enough, but if we don't start him, we are holding him back and he will end up bored ( essentially having done 3 years of montesorri).

Any advice would be really appreciated.

I would wait until he is 5,Mammy knows his best .
At 4 years and 3 months he will probably be the youngest in his class .

byhookorbycrook

In a proper Montessori, he should never be bored.

sm213

I was 4 years 2 months when I started and always the youngest in the class and hated it.
I didn't do ty but repeated 5th year and did my leaving at 17.
I'd have liked the extra year.
My daughters birthday is end of September so she will be very near to 5 starting, although if I feel she's not ready I might wait an extra year.
Legally you don't have to start them until age 6, and from what I've read teachers prefer them to be a bit independant as the class sizes tend to be so big an immature child could get left behind.
Its all very confusing trying to do the best for your child. I feel whatever I do will never be the right thing sometimes.

the goon

Thanks for all the replies. Ya, I think in my mind I was uncomfortable with him going into primary school at barely 4 years of age. I spoke with the principle of the school he will be attending and with some other teachers. As a result, we decided not to send him until he is 5. I am happy with our decision as I think he needs the year to develop the coping mechanisms and maturity for it.

Once again thanks for all the advice.Much appreciated

LordSutch

blackbird 49 wrote: »

It really depends on the child, I think it is better to be near the 5 than the 4, my own child was 4 in the February and I sent him he had no problems...

I agree, I also think its a very "individual based" decision.

grudgehugger

My son's birthday is right at the start of March and has started school at 4 (and a half) rather than waiting til 5 (and a half).

He'd had almost four years in creche as we both work and we reckoned he'd be bored with another year of that (and that he seemed ready - although we were nervous!)

Early days but he is settling in great to his class - making friends etc. - some of the older kids are giants compared to him though!

So our experience is initially positive with sending our child at 4.5 - massively individual decision though and I'd say if he was even a couple of months older we wouldn't have sent him.

firemansam4

IMO it really is all dependent on the child in question, I think if the child is meeting all the milestones and the parents are happy sending them when they are younger, then they should start at the younger age.

Our son was born in February and we started him aged 5, he is the oldest in his class and many kids didn't even turn 5 till well after he turned 6.
But the reasons we decided to hold him back another year was simply because we didn't think he was ready. He was a bit late hitting his milestones and he also had to attend speech therapy for a while when he was in playschool.
He is now in 2nd class and I think we are really happy we made the decision to start him aged 5, he seems to be doing very well at school now and has no issues with any of his subjects, he probably is one of the best at reading and writing in his class right now.

ted1

Id start them at 4, being 6 in junior infants is way too old.

They'll be too old for sports teams in secondary school and will be playing with the year above.

In my case (I started when 5) I finished college at 24 which is too old.
8 years primary + 6 years secondary + 5 years college ( engineering)

I wanted to do a masters but there was no way I was going to do be any older entering the workforce. My friends who started at 4 and did a Shorter course we're 3 years into their careers when I finished
I ended up doing a part time MSc