Humiliated by my cooking skills

diusmr8a504cvk

So last Friday I was cooking in school and my cookery skills have always been bad. I've always been in the lower tier and I even failed my cooking pre for my Junior Cert which is one of the most heartbreaking things to ever happen to me after putting in so much effort in practice only for it all to mess up, but I digress.

I'm in 5th year and last Friday was our 2nd week of cooking, the first week had gone mediocre but I was still the worst by far. The second week everything was going fine until we had to make white sauce. After following the instructions to the best of my skills, I called the teacher to ask her for her opinion as I wasn't very sure. She gave me a big stare with her gob open wide and asked me what I was doing, I replied that I followed the recipe and she then told me to throw the sauce away and start over. She really made me feel like a complete idiot by the way that she stared and talked to me as well as the fact that the other dozen students were all watching me. Rather than showing me how to do it she got a female student to do it for me. All of a sudden I felt really upset and alone and had to bite my lip to stop myself from bawling as I just felt so stupid as well as the fact that everyone was nearly done with their cooking while I sat their like a spare prick watching someone do what I couldn't do perfectly.

I'm generally a fairly thick skinned Rhino but this really got to me, I can't explain why really. I'm in 5th year and really like home Ec despite my poor cookery skills. This just really upset me and upon thinking about it a week later at 2AM I began bawling. This is more of a statement than a question and I'm usually not this emotional. All comments are appreciated.

iusedtoknow

I'm 30 and LOVE cooking (and am male), and I seriously cannot tell you how many dishes I've thrown away because of mistakes...some examples

1. Roast Chicken, but I had left a knife in the roasting tin that melted the plastic
2. confused garlic powder as being the same as minced garlic ("ah sure it'll be grand"...it wasn't)
3. Messed up a curry...badly on more than one occasion
4. Miscued timing on lamb shanks, got a take out instead

Everyone makes mistakes when cooking, it's a part of life that you actually have to laugh at (later, after the annoyance/embarrassment has worn off)

You have a couple of options with your teacher. One - go and talk to her after class what you could have done better or two - the next recipe you are cooking, practice at home or have a look at youtube videos for the techniques that you'll be using.

In our school we had a food prep (i think it was called food craft or something) course in Transition year, i loved it and it really gave me an appreciation for cooking. Whatever you do, don't give up and if you enjoy it - learn yourself. It's something that you'll need for the rest of your life.

Neyite

I think your teacher was very unprofessional the way she handled it. She's supposed to teach, for gods sake! You are already very aware that this is an area that you find difficult which is why her reaction got to you so much and why you are still upset now. And it is humiliating to get pulled up in front of people, its an embarassment that you feel for a while. So your reaction is fairly normal I'd say.

White sauce is initially tricky to get, but one of those things that after a few goes it will be a doddle. My guess is that your heat was too high. I always start off with a lower heat because all cookers can vary. I'm a pretty keen cook but there have been some disasters along the way, and at your age I literally couldn't boil an egg. My home Ec teacher hated me I reckon. Even this week I attempted bread rolls that could crack a windscreen. They got binned If you enjoy it, dabble with it at home, start helping whoever makes the dinner, its amazing what you pick up that way. Then, you can do a simple dish or two with them assisting and supervising. There is a cooking club here on boards, that have some tried and tested amazing dishes, and posters are really good about answering questions about substitute ingredients or clarifying something.

One tip for classes is to measure out everything first, then you can concentrate solely on the cooking process without something burning while you are trying to measure the next ingredient. The second one is to pay attention to your heat settings. The third is to acknowledge that there will be disasters along the way and don't beat yourself up when they happen.

hardCopy

I also love cooking and like to think I'm pretty good at it. But I was a LOT older than you before I got beyond frying sausages.

I've never made a white sauce but judging by how often the contestants on masterchef end up splitting their sauce I'd say it's not all that easy.

Your teacher is a tool, taking over someone's work and failing to explain what happened is one of the worst things a teacher/tutor can do. Unhelpful and unprofessional.

This thread might cheer you up, full of cooking fails from experienced cooks.

http://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057040705/1

At least you didn't have any flames to deal with.

Keep at the cooking and don't let other people offload their ****ty moods onto you.

Big Bag of Chips

Would you feel confident enough to approach the teacher? I think you are perfectly within your rights to ask her can you have a word, and explain to her that you are trying your best and genuinely want to learn but you are upset by the way she handled it and would appreciate a little more guidance.

She should have no objection to that, it is her job to instruct after all!

By the way, at your age I was a woeful cook! 20 years later I'm not a whole lot better . I enjoy baking though.. Maybe because I love eating cakes and desserts!!

bp

That isn't how teachers should be! I love to cook and bake and amnt half bad - but no joke cannot fry an egg! Bread, complicated cakes etc all fine - frying or boiling an egg just cannot do!!

Keep practing and ask to help at home. Oh advice I NEVER take from my self - always read the entire recipe before you begin. I have messed up many a time by not doing that!

angeldaisy

Is there anyone at home you could ask for help? I know that I'd be more than willing to help out anyone who was struggling. but they'd have to ask first. I wouldn't want to think I was imposing or anything.

My neice is in your position, and believe me I've eaten some woeful excuses for food from her. However she kept practicing and she's getting much better.

Don't be disheartened, if you're interested in cooking get some basic books, stick on YouTube and practice!

VandC

Firstly don't be embarrassed by your cooking skills. I can't cook and everybody knows it, in fact I can screw up a bowl of corn flakes. Talk to your teacher and explain how you feel and that you really are trying and genuinely want to learn. Nobody is great or even good at everything and deals with it differently. My friends slag me for my cooking,which I just laugh at, but they would like to be as good at other things that I do well. I can't offer you cooking tips, but if you do keep trying you will get better. It's important to learn how to deal with your feelings and the frustrations of it. We all make mistakes and you just need to learn from them, laugh at them and move on. Don't be worried about what other people think, it's only important what you think and feel. Try talking to your teacher, she acted very unprofessionally and maybe if she understood where you are coming from she might be willing to help you a little bit more. Failing that maybe take a cooking class or ask someone you know who is good at cooking to help you. Good luck :-)

kylith

I think that your love of cooking is an admirable thing, and believe me a white sauce, from scratch, is something I still feck up on a regular basis. I was in my 20s before I could cook anything more than koka noodles.

Is there someone at home, a friend, or someone in your class who could help you out by giving you pointers and being a guinea pig for you? Youtube is also a great cooking resource; you can find a video on how to make literally anything, and you can pause and go back as much as you want, and you can see what it's supposed to look like. You could also approach the teacher and ask for some out-of-hours tuition, though tbh I'd be more inclined to talk to your year head about how the matter was handled.

PS. You don't say what the problem with your sauce was. If it was lumpy I'd say you added the milk too quickly. Make your roux then add literally a dribble of milk at a time (I take it off the heat for this) and mix like your life depended on it. Keep dribbling in liquid until the sauce goes liquid and the lumps are gone.

diusmr8a504cvk

kylith wrote: »

PS. You don't say what the problem with your sauce was. If it was lumpy I'd say you added the milk too quickly. Make your roux then add literally a dribble of milk at a time (I take it off the heat for this) and mix like your life depended on it. Keep dribbling in liquid until the sauce goes liquid and the lumps are gone.

It ended up looking like porridge, that for the reply!

Stavro Mueller

Ugh. I remember my own home economics teacher sneering at the way I cut an onion when I was your age. Not in the unpleasant way yours behaved - she was way out of line. If someone treated a colleague like that in a workplace on an ongoing basis, they'd find themselves in hot water for bullying. If this wasn't a one off and she continues to pick on in this nasty fashion, it might not be a bad idea to have one of your parents meet with her. Bullies aren't so brave when they're pulled up on their bad behaviour. She's not the one who's going to be marking your leaving cert paper so she can't harm you.

The suggestions from the other posters about getting in some practice in the company of someone who's better at cooking are good ones. With practice you will get better. You also learn from your mistakes. I've no doubt your Home Ec teacher has produced burned, lumpy, inedible food in her time too.

rsl1976

The teacher comes across as very unprofessional. If you enjoy cooking keep at it. Have you tried at home, maybe it's the feeling of been under pressure in school that's making you slip up.

I wouldn't be the best cook either,but if I'm left alone I can usually get it together. I once burned a pot of boiling eggs if that makes you feel any better. I'm female nearly 40 and if it wasn't for my husband I would live on frozen food.

Tearin It Up

I made soup before and I burnt it and it evaporated away, there was no soup left. We're all useless at something at first. I'm better at it now.

LegacyUser

OP, I've been cooking for years now and still get things wrong on many occasions.

Couple of things I don't like:
1. Cooking under pressure with people watching

2. Cooking a white sauce.
I avoid cooking white sauce if at all possible. For example i generally cook everything from scratch but when making lasagne I always buy the bechemel sauce for the top.

Your teacher did not behave appropriately it seems.

Do you know in advance what you will be cooking at the next class? If so, look at some recipes, watch examples on YouTube and maybe try it at home.

Either way don't worry. It will come to you

Teyla Emmagan

Your teacher shouldn't have reacted like that and I'm sorry the memory is causing you grief. It's very hard to feel like you've failed at something you particularly like. It makes us all feel bad about ourselves. It is a perfectly natural reaction.

On the cooking side, it is all practice, practice, practice. The more you do it the more you realise when X is wrong and Y looks right. If you want to get good you will have to practice at home as much as possible during the week. In your free time, instead of TV of whatever, try cooking! Take on the job of Sunday dinner by yourself for example. It might take a few goes but you will soon be able to do the whole thing from scratch. And even the best cooks get it wrong at times. So just learn from your mistakes and don't best yourself up over them. If you are worried about class you can even practice what is coming up in advance to give yourself some confidence. You will be on masterchef in no time!!

kylith

Amalia Orange Mask wrote: »

It ended up looking like porridge, that for the reply!

Well, if she couldn't tell you how to fix it or where you went wrong she's not much of a teacher, imo.

Keep practising as much as you can and try not to let her get to you. It's possible that she has the outdated view that men shouldn't cook, which is complete balderdash. In time you'll nail that sauce, and everything else, and you'll have the last laugh when you're dishing up lush food to your friends and family.

Teach30

I second what everyone else here is saying - keep practicing! You didn't mention did the dish turn out well in the end? We're you happy with it? at least then you will have a positive to focus on.

White sauce isn't difficult to make from scratch it just takes patience. I can see how in a classroom situation it could go wrong as you are rushing for time and you prob just added to much milk at once before the starch had time to absorb it hence the lumpy texture.

I'm a home ec teacher and I suppose there are times when we get frustrated when students don't concentrate and make mistakes. We genuinely want you to make a dish you can take home and eat so perhaps your teacher was surprised that you should know what your doing and then when it didn't work out got frustrated for you. You must remember making you start again from scratch wasnt ideal for anyone but at least you got it right the second time.
I find it strange you are cooking so late in 5th yr have you all the assignments researched? If you have at least you can practice the upcoming dishes at home beforehand. This would help your confidence.

Btw you say you failed your junior cert pre - this isn't unusual! I hope you got on well in the real thing and remember it's important to move on from these things and focus on where you did well!

dee_mc

This teacher behaved very unprofessionally. Her job is to teach you Home Ec, including cookery skills! I've worked at the same job, and whenever students politely came to me with their concerns, I did my best to help them out. The same can be said for the vast majority of teachers.
I'd advise asking her when you can have a chat with her, one to one, and explaining to her that you need a bit more support in class in terms of helping you develop your cookery skills. Explain that you put in the prep work and followed the theory in terms of doing what it said in the recipe, but that you'll occasionally need her input to help you do things right.
Tell her you lost confidence in your cooking skills as a result of making mistakes in your junior cert practical pre. and that with her help you'd love to improve.
Try not to get too upset over this, hopefully it will be sorted easily enough

LegacyUser

OP, I left school a long time ago but I got A'A's in home ec for the junior and leaving cert. I was really good at the practical stuff and I still am but I do get stuff wrong.

When I was at school, there were people who consistently got stuff wrong while cooking. A lack of basic understanding and sometimes listening were the issue. If you understand what is happening while you cook, you will understand why you need to do stuff a certain way. Equally, it is important to listen to, watch the examples and read the recipe! Cooking is easy if you know how to follow the instructions.

For now, look up white sauce, understand what a roux is and practice at home.

ABajaninCork

Oh gosh!! The so-called teacher is an idiot. I bet even Marco Pierre White and Gordon Ramsey have had a few mishaps. You should've have told her that. I did Home Economics at school and can't say I was very good at it. Barely scraped a pass in my CSE...

Years later - I can cook. Long and painful process with plenty of mistakes along the way. But no-one has ever got sick and died from my cooking. I've even been told I'm a good cook! Can't bloody bake for toffee though.

Practice, preparation and timing; that's the key. It won't happen overnight. But stick at it - it'll come.

Redser87

I didn't do Home Ec in school so I may be totally wrong on this (love cooking though and love baking even more). I remember my sister coming up with her own menu for one of the state exams, I'm pretty sure it was the Leaving. Do you have to cook the exact same thing as everyone else in your class? If not, you could come up with dishes that don't involve things like white sauce, custard etc. I am good at them now after a) lots of practice and b) getting a gas oven rather than electric rings. When I was living in apartments with electric rings where the heat settings were hard to adjust, no way I was able to do precision jobs like custard or roux. you could make something that you are genuinely interested in... a pie maybe... once you know how to make a basic pie, you can change the fillings around and have a different one each time!

bee06

I don't think there is a practical in the leaving cert. There wasn't went I did it anyway and we didn't do any cooking either because we were too busy trying to get through the huge curriculum.

OP I'd just echo what a lot of other posters have said, your teacher was out of line. If you made a mistake it's her job to explain what happened and how it should be done.

Katgurl

I'm disgusted with your teacher to be honest. I teach maths and I would never ever criticise someone who tried but hasn't mastered something - becuase it's my job to teach them!

please don't let this dent your confidence, keep trying and take the cooking suggestions on board.

diusmr8a504cvk

Katgurl wrote: »

I'm disgusted with your teacher to be honest. I teach maths and I would never ever criticise someone who tried but hasn't mastered something - becuase it's my job to teach them!

please don't let this dent your confidence, keep trying and take the cooking suggestions on board.

You're not the first one to say it about the teacher and when it did happen, in my own mind I was thinking: "Hold on, I think I'm being hard done by here".

diusmr8a504cvk

Teach30 wrote: »

but at least you got it right the second time.

I didn't get a chance to make it a second time as she got a female student to make it for me, thanks for your reply,all kind words are appreciated.

diusmr8a504cvk

Homecoooking wrote: »

Do you know in advance what you will be cooking at the next class? If so, look at some recipes, watch examples on YouTube and maybe try it at home

Yeah I know a week before, I'll start doing more research in advance, thanks for the reply.

diusmr8a504cvk

Thanks for all your messages and if you have anymore than feel free to comment. I would cook with someone but as a whole I feel really out of place in this Home Ec class. I'm a fairly outgoing guy that's usually never short for words but when it comes to Home Ec class I just shut up and say nothing because I'm one of two males in the class so I leave it to the women to talk.

The first week of cooking I noticed that she got kind of thick with me during the cooking, just bad attitude responses to questions as I had asked her about the white sauce again. She's a good theory teacher but I think that she expects everyone to be up to par in terms of cooking which they are other than myself.

LegacyUser

sorry to hear about the attitude off the teacher OP, when I stumbled across this thread it brought back some unpleasant memories and I couldn't believe the similarity betexperience in home ec and my own when I was in school. my teacher too was a bitch at times, totally intolerant of mistakes and errors, if anything burned or you made a mess you were gonna hear about it. it was like hells kitchen with Gordon ramsay at times, without the swearing. in theory she was fine, but the practicals brought out the worst in both her and me. It all came to a head when I failed my mock which i didn't prepare for and thought I could wing it but managed a decent JC. afterwards I dropped home ec and never looked back. the kitchen environment just wasn't for me, I got flustered and nervous and made many mistakes due to time pressures and anxiety causing me to lose concentration. it was the one class I would always dread, and made conscious efforts to avoid if I could. the teacher just wasn't approachable, she was ok sometimes but I wouldn't be going out of my way to chat with her and ask for help. oh, and she used to ask other students to help me as well, once or twice openly criticising me in front of the class. I was always well behaved but they she couldn't handle my many mistakes, like spilling stuff and working too slow. it came as a shock as no other teacher spoke to me like that. I always took it to heart.

you sound like a nice lad with good intentions, who will surely improve in time, with plenty of practice of course. try your best to put this incident behind you, and focus on improving for next time and showing her you can do better. if you're gonna have a word with her about it I would do it tactfully, not coming across as cheeky or blaming her for her attitude, but respectfully stating your issue with the white sauce incident. or maybe not at all, as she might turn it round on you and point out how you were wrong. that open mouthed 'what are you doing' crap is the same sh1t my teacher used to pull, and the other posters are right in saying she was unprofessional to walk off without explaining your mistake. maybe she was under time pressure herself, was she busy and hadn't time to? its bad form anyway. you can try and see the frustration from her point of view as a teacher, but I would never speak to anyone like that unless they genuinely were taking the piss.

try not to let it swallow you up any further, I know how these things can sit and dwell in your head all day and even drive you to tears, but it can often be character forming and make you a stronger person, thickening that skin a bit more. I complete empathise with you on every level. now go and nail that white sauce soldier.

LadyAthame

Learn perhaps to enjoy correction and see it as advancement. Show your enthusiasm for her corrections. It shows diligence in a student.

The fact that you acknowledge you messed up and want to do better shows devotion to the class. Some teachers are stricter than others it can be a good thing.

But after her correcting you and that was all over and done she perhaps should have picked you up a little so you did not feel such an emotional drop.

Diziet

Hi there OP. I don't know if it has been mentioned before, but how about making dinner a couple of times a week? Pick a simple recipe on a weekend to start with, then broaden the scope. Nothing like practice, and you will get stacks of brownie points at home, too.

LadyAthame

OP can you switch to another home ec class with a different teacher in your school? There is usually more than one class in each subject for each year.

Grandeeod

Im going to reiterate the point about not worrying about your cooking skills at this or any other point in your life. But I'm going to really reiterate the point that your teacher, IMO, was out of line. It looks like your teacher seriously underminded your confidence and that is not what a teacher should do.

diusmr8a504cvk

LadyAthame wrote: »

Learn perhaps to enjoy correction and see it as advancement. Show your enthusiasm for her corrections. It shows diligence in a student.

The fact that you acknowledge you messed up and want to do better shows devotion to the class. Some teachers are stricter than others it can be a good thing.

But after her correcting you and that was all over and done she perhaps should have picked you up a little so you did not feel such an emotional drop.

Correction would infer that she showed me where I went wrong, what she did was tell me that I was wrong and walk away. I'm good at taking correction and I realise that you're only trying to help but there were no positives to take from my mistakes at the time, thanks for the reply.

diusmr8a504cvk

LadyAthame wrote: »

OP can you switch to another home ec class with a different teacher in your school? There is usually more than one class in each subject for each year.

Unfortunately the other two choice subjects I do only have one class so I can't, thanks for the reply.

diusmr8a504cvk

Well lads! I return with an update. I'm making Chicken Burgers next week for Home Ec and it involves White Sauce again. Today, after my mother did a quick demonstration I successfully made White Sauce for the day's dinner. I hope I'll be able to make it next week with no hitches.

ABajaninCork

Well done! You'll fly through the lesson with no problems!!

bee06

Well done! On another note, as well as being a bad teacher your HE teacher has really weird taste. Chicken burgers with white sauce… yuck!

ABajaninCork

I have to say I REALLY hate white sauce!! I mean - what is the point of it? It tastes of nothing and looks awful. I don't like chicken burgers either, but hey! Each to their own...:D

themissymoo

Amalia Orange Mask wrote: »

She gave me a big stare with her gob open wide and asked me what I was doing.

She really made me feel like a complete idiot by the way that she stared and talked to me as well as the fact that the other dozen students were all watching me.

All of a sudden I felt really upset and alone and had to bite my lip to stop myself from bawling as I just felt so stupid.

I'm generally a fairly thick skinned Rhino but this really got to me, I can't explain why really. I'm in 5th year and really like home Ec despite my poor cookery skills. This just really upset me and upon thinking about it a week later at 2AM I began bawling.

Hi OP,

I had a similar situation in fifth year, where I ended up bawling for ten minutes after my teacher gave out to me in class. I was already having a rough day, and she lost it over a very poor test result (D when I usually got Bs/Cs). So trust me, I get it. It's mortifying being shouted at in front of your peers, and even worse when it hits you so hard that you get completely upset. If cooking isn't your strong point, you don't need your teacher (who is supposed to be supportive and helping you) to remind you of this.

I find the fact that a week later you're still upset worrying. Not because you shouldn't be, but because it has clearly affected you deeply. I recommend you go to the school counsellor and speak about it. This could develop into something much larger. It's been three years since that teacher gave out to me, but telling people about it still has me near-tears. It has left its mark (a big one at that), and it's something I'm attending counselling for as the problem developed and grew. It got to the point where I was near tears when my teacher talked to me (even asking how I was), in case I said something wrong and they were angry again.

I don't want this to happen to you. Sixth year will be tough enough. This could cause unnecessary stress. Please go to the school counsellor and mention that an incident in class still has you upset a week on. It's best to nip this in the bud, if it has the potential to grow.

Best of luck, OP. x

diusmr8a504cvk

Well lads, I cooked the burgers and the White sauce today without a bother.I can't believe I ever really struggled with it to be honest! By the way, the white sauce and the chicken were blended together before cooking. I thought that burgers served with white sauce may be weird.

Teyla Emmagan

Well done OP! The joys of going in prepared. Hope this boosts your confidence again. Good for you.

hardCopy

Great stuff, now on to the Cooking and Recipes Forum with you

syklops

Amalia Orange Mask wrote: »

So last Friday I was cooking in school and my cookery skills have always been bad. I've always been in the lower tier and I even failed my cooking pre for my Junior Cert which is one of the most heartbreaking things to ever happen to me after putting in so much effort in practice only for it all to mess up, but I digress.

I'm in 5th year and last Friday was our 2nd week of cooking, the first week had gone mediocre but I was still the worst by far. The second week everything was going fine until we had to make white sauce. After following the instructions to the best of my skills, I called the teacher to ask her for her opinion as I wasn't very sure. She gave me a big stare with her gob open wide and asked me what I was doing, I replied that I followed the recipe and she then told me to throw the sauce away and start over. She really made me feel like a complete idiot by the way that she stared and talked to me as well as the fact that the other dozen students were all watching me. Rather than showing me how to do it she got a female student to do it for me. All of a sudden I felt really upset and alone and had to bite my lip to stop myself from bawling as I just felt so stupid as well as the fact that everyone was nearly done with their cooking while I sat their like a spare prick watching someone do what I couldn't do perfectly.

I'm generally a fairly thick skinned Rhino but this really got to me, I can't explain why really. I'm in 5th year and really like home Ec despite my poor cookery skills. This just really upset me and upon thinking about it a week later at 2AM I began bawling. This is more of a statement than a question and I'm usually not this emotional. All comments are appreciated.

Im 31, love cooking, have been cooking since I was about 14, and I only recently got my white sauce right.

Your teacher sounds like a bitch. Dont take it to heart.

dellas1979

Amalia Orange Mask wrote: »

Well lads, I cooked the burgers and the White sauce today without a bother.I can't believe I ever really struggled with it to be honest! By the way, the white sauce and the chicken were blended together before cooking. I thought that burgers served with white sauce may be weird.

I think this is one of the cutest posts/threads ever (I do not condone how that teacher handled herself though).

Well done on cooking it all!