Moving abroad alone - a silly idea or a chance for a new life?

LegacyUser

So i'm in an awful depressive rut at home and thinking of going abroad on one of them working holiday visa things - either Canada or Australia. Leaning towards Oz due to my liking for hot weather. My issue is that most people I know of who do it, go with a big group of mates or even 2 or 3. i see the pics on facebook all the time - groups of 3 or 4 posting their pics at the airport "see ya's next year" I'd be going it completely alone. and that scares me.

I've traveled alone before 3 times but I tend to keep to myself. Being a shy introvert doesn't place me in the ideal situation for solo travel. I tend to interact with locals more and on my most recent trip in Asia I had a 6 week fling, which ultimately ended in pain for me but I guess it was an experience. I do have the odd connection with fellow travelers on solo trips but it tends to be for 2 or 3 days max.

I actually set off on my last trip with the intention of not returning until I got the working holiday from my system. But self-doubt and anxiety over being alone or losing all my money crept in, along with my judgement being clouded by complications from the aforementioned holiday romance and now i'm home. As soon as I touched down in Dublin I knew it was a mistake to come home. All i'm doing is moping about the failed holiday romance, the lack of enjoyment I get from being at home and the fact I spent nearly €700 of my savings to come home.

Would it be idiotic of me to head back out and give it a try once and for all? It has been in my mind for nearly 2 years. I guess the motivation for it is because I'm in a rut at home, and i'm thinking living in a different country might open my eyes, bring me out of my shell and also make it more clear to me where I want to go with my life. I know it won't be easy, but it might give me a better chance to grow than moping around at home wondering what might have been.

I know nobody here can decide my path in life. I just want to know if doing something like this alone would be wise? It could be a great opportunity but on the other hand I could go there, and blow my money and end up coming home because I can't find work. I'd have €5800 in the bank after flights and visa and i'm scared this is not enough to help support me. It's something I want to do, so I should I just...do it? Can these working holidays give people a chance to reinvent their lives?

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

R.D. aka MR.D

It sounds a little bit like you are jumping from one thing to the next.
Why did you decide to come home in the first place?

Honestly, I wouldn't be inclined to move abroad without a solid plan. On this 'working holiday', what would you ideally like to do?

Of course you should travel and see the world but don't leave yourself short. It's absolutely no problem doing it alone but you should have a decent idea of what it is you want. Are you travelling for a love of it? Are you trying to make friends? Self-improvement? To figure out which career you want?

What is your general direction?

I've lived in 4 different countries now and the most valuable lesson that i've learned is that you should have a reason whether it be money or learning the language or meeting a partner or simply meeting other like minded, well educated people to have a good time with. The worst thing is to be directionless.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the encouragement sashafierce, I think Australia would definitely suit me more by the sounds of it.

To R.D AKA MR.D....

I came home in the first place because my head was all over the place due to complications in the holiday romance I had. It clouded my judgement and I didn't know whether to come home or stay travelling. It was a costly mistake but oh well.

There is no single reason why I want to do the working holiday, there are a few different reasons. First is because I love to travel and have wanted to experience living in a different country for a long time. Secondly I think self-improvement is a big part of it for me. My life has been going nowhere at home for a while and I've been very unhappy. My friends are very few and all are in relationships so I'm lonely a lot of the time and to be honest it hurts quite bad to be so alone. I guess I saw the working holiday as a chance to meet loads of like minded people and come out of my shell more. There are also career reasons. I picked the wrong college course and would like to try different jobs. I've heard that the pay even for quite basic jobs can be good in Australia which is also a bonus.

I guess I just feel like my life needs a drastic change. fair enough I could try change at home but i'm just not that happy living in Ireland. The times I've been traveling have been the only times the gloom on my life has lifted over the last year or so.

Est28

OP,
I did a J1 years ago but it was with just 1 buddy, not a big group. And now I work in the States, came here alone. I also backpacked around Europe for a month alone a few years ago.

I would recommend it to EVERYONE. There's a few things you need to relaize though.

- It's a working holiday. So it's not 24/7 party. There's good and bad bits involved and a bit of sacrifice and hard work but really worth it if not much is happening elsewhere at home.

- Get off Facebook. And stop comparing to everyone. I've met plenty other Irish in my travels and it never fails to amaze me how you meet someone for real and they have the same stresses and problems as everyone else abroad yet you look on their Facebook and to anyone back home it looks like 24/7 party central. It's ridiculous. Nobody's life is like that. It's all for show.

- It's only for a set time. So stick it out. My first year working in the states was TOUGH but I committed to staying a year and I had the option to extend if I liked it. 3 months in I'd have run home only for that commitment, but after the year... well, I haven't gone back!

- I MUCH prefer travelling and going places alone. Personal preference but the reason is there is no group politics. I can come and go as I please. You'll meet locals that way because you HAVE to. People in groups stick together and never meet anyone else. Why would you go all the way to AUSTRALIA and spend the whole time in an Irish pub over there with the folks you see in the local every week at home? Its what everyone does but I don't understand it personally. You meet new people, learn new (non-irish) place to go and see all the cool things in the city when and wherever you want.

- I told all the above to a friend who was a homebody but decided to do the year in Oz a while back. When he came back he said I was right. He had to step outside his comfort zone a bit and meet people but that it was the best thing he ever did as he wouldn't even consider it at home.

- If you don't like it, in the end, you've got your home in Ireland.

LegacyUser

OP, Why limit yourself to English speaking countries? This is a trait of the UK and Irish emigrants who narrow their choices do much.
Take Bavaria, for example? Almost full employment and loads of jobs, and you'll have a new language to use when you're done?

And, do go on your own, it'll be great.

MrWalsh

Op you have a very recent thread here on this issue and lots of people advised you to resolve your mental health issues as a priority. I am still of the same opinion on this. Going away does not resolve your problems, they are not external, they are internal. A change of geography does not mean good mental health. I dont think starting new threads with a slightly different spin on things is all that healthy either - its as though you just want to pretend you never asked the original question because you didnt like the answers.

Please, look after your mental health first.