childminder going too far???

mollytev32

Came home from work the other day and was collecting my 7 mth old from childminders (sis in law) as I was leaving I said god I must cut babys nails tonight as I knew dey were long...as I said this I felt his nails and realised they had been cut....childminder pipes up and says ahh I did dem today...am I being too sensitive?? I kinda feel that is my job as his mother ..just like bathing him bringin him to doctor etc....I keep telling myself to cop on and get over it yet it won't stop popping into my head....Please b honest am I being stupid...

professore

Sounds like a caring childminder to me.

professore

professore wrote: »

Sounds like a caring childminder to me.

There's very little to add other than this.

I can't really comprehend why you think cutting the baby's nails is "going too far"

If you don't want her to do it then just ask her politely not to do so again but it does seem like a very odd thing to be upset by.

thickhead

mollytev32 wrote:

Came home from work the other day and was collecting my 7 mth old from childminders (sis in law) as I was leaving I said god I must cut babys nails tonight as I knew dey were long...as I said this I felt his nails and realised they had been cut....childminder pipes up and says ahh I did dem today...am I being too sensitive?? I kinda feel that is my job as his mother ..just like bathing him bringin him to doctor etc....I keep telling myself to cop on and get over it yet it won't stop popping into my head....Please b honest am I being stupid...

When my little girl was 5 months old my sister my perfectly sane sister bit the little ones nails off. If I didn't kill her you should be fine.

Marz66

I understand. This was asked on here before so you're not the only one who feels that way. She probably didn't see it as an intimate thing connected with bathtime. If you do just tell her you'd like to do that job anymore.

cyning

I understand too: fingernails wouldn't bother me but I really hate other small things. For me it's because I'm not there to do them. I cried when I got home the day she sewed my little girls favourite teddy bear that I hadn't fixed for over a week: I just take a deep breath inside because it's not her fault I feel that way (and thanked her!)... Once my girls are happy, I wanted them to have a home from home, and sometimes that means they will do homey stuff. If it really bothers you say it I'm sure she wouldn't want to upset you. For me it was just that I wasn't there and she was.

mollytev32

Knew I was being stupid.....Thank u all for confirming such...she's a brilliant childminder and I should b delighted it's just cos I'm not with my child as much as I'd like to be...I'm wishing I was the one home with him...😂anyway thank u all for ur honest comments

blackbird 49

professore wrote: »

Sounds like a caring childminder to me.

Agree, when I minded my sisters kids, I would cut their nails if long, sometimes I would ask her will I do it and sometimes not, she was glad when I did as she would keep forgetting to do it herself.

Cunning Stunt

I don't see it as an issue either. Perhaps she was concerned he might scratch himself or one of the other kids (by accident) - perhaps he already had.

PippaChic

OP, at first I couldn't understand why you were upset over this, but I was brought back to when my son was a toddler and being minded by my mother-in-law. I collected him to find his beautiful wavy hair all cut off (he was 18 months old then)! My sister-in-law visited and between them decided he needed a haircut to look like a "real boy"! I didn't say a thing, but my "evil" look when they mentioned how lovely his hair was spoke volumes!

Like yourself I hated having to work and wished I could stay at home with him too!

ncmc

Pippa, I would have tore the head of them for cutting his hair!!! That is totally over stepping the mark. Cutting nails is a safety thing but there is no justification for cutting hair without your permission.

OP, when I read the title and the start of your post, I thought you were so ungrateful, but I see now that it's just you feel like you're missing the little things. I'm back at work three months and my MIL minds my baby, she loves being up in her grandads arms and while the rational part of me loves that she's so happy and settled, the crazy mum in me hates that she's happy anywhere but with me! Your prob not long back at work, it does get (a little) easier.

January

PippaChic wrote: »

OP, at first I couldn't understand why you were upset over this, but I was brought back to when my son was a toddler and being minded by my mother-in-law. I collected him to find his beautiful wavy hair all cut off (he was 18 months old then)! My sister-in-law visited and between them decided he needed a haircut to look like a "real boy"! I didn't say a thing, but my "evil" look when they mentioned how lovely his hair was spoke volumes!

Like yourself I hated having to work and wished I could stay at home with him too!

Thats a step too far and I would have been like a raving lunatic if anybody touched my child's hair without my consultation but finger nails would be fine .

Boober Fraggle

I felt like that the first time my childminder cut my dd's nails. They badly needed cutting and I had meant to so it the few nights before she did, but I hadn't gotten around to it. I felt a bit like she was criticising my parenting by cutting them. Then I realised that she saw that they needed to be cut, cut them, and probably thought no more about it!!