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a voice from god

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  • 23-03-2015 9:45am
    #1
    crazygeryy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,065 ✭✭✭


    A priest in the news today told the woman he was having an affair with,that a voice from god told him not to see her anymore.

    Have any of you ah ers heard a voice from god?


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    #2
    whiskeyman
    Registered Users Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    The chick next door regularly gets late night phone calls from him as far as I can make out.

    I hear her phone buzzing and then she starts calling out his name, but the reception must be poor as she shouts his name louder and louder...


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    #3
    deandean
    Registered Users Posts: 2,229 ✭✭✭deandean


    crazygeryy wrote: »
    Have any of you ah ers heard a voice from god?

    The Voice from God in that case was God warning the priest that she is TROUBLE and he should run like hell.

    And judging by the splash in the papers today, God was right.


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    #4
    Zombienosh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,911 ✭✭✭Zombienosh


    Handiest break up excuse ever, "eh listen love, god told me to be on me way"


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    #5
    RobbingBandit
    Registered Users Posts: 18,107 ✭✭✭✭RobbingBandit


    My last talk with the credit union I told them God told me my loan was cleared, it didn't fly. :(


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    #6
    The_Valeyard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,452 ✭✭✭✭The_Valeyard


    This is the voice of God,

    Godfrey Jones.


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    #7
    fermanagh_man
    Registered Users Posts: 810 ✭✭✭fermanagh_man


    I always imagined God sounds like Morgan Freeman


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    #8
    kneemos
    Registered Users Posts: 20,419 ✭✭✭✭kneemos


    whiskeyman wrote: »
    The chick next door regularly gets late night phone calls from him as far as I can make out.

    I hear her phone buzzing and then she starts calling out his name, but the reception must be poor as she shouts his name louder and louder...

    Who do Muslims call out to?


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    #9
    shruikan2553
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,113 ✭✭✭shruikan2553


    I hear voices but they don't call themselves god. They just tell me to burn things.


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    #10
    Knex*
    Registered Users Posts: 22,477 ✭✭✭✭Knex*


    And if she's pregnant, its an immaculate conception.

    Nice save priest. Nice save.


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    #11
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,966 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    kneemos wrote: »
    Who do Muslims call out to?
    That would be an ecumenical matter.


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    #12
    fizzypish
    Registered Users Posts: 1,000 ✭✭✭fizzypish


    kneemos wrote: »
    Who do Muslims call out to?

    Do it for allah?


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    #13
    Hermy
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 11,339 Mod ✭✭✭✭Hermy


    crazygeryy wrote: »
    A priest in the news today told the woman he was having an affair with,that a voice from god told him not to see her anymore.

    Have any of you ah ers heard a voice from god?

    If it wasn't God with a capital G then he should just ignore it.

    Genealogy Forum Mod



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    #14
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 13,712 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I was so off my gee i thought i had a conversation with Saint Dominic. He's my favourite.

    Never been so balubas as to have heard the voice of God.

    I guess that's the new target.


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    #15
    _Kaiser_
    Registered Users Posts: 28,771 ✭✭✭✭_Kaiser_


    First thing I thought of when I read the thread title was this....

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKZSqd5Y8nA


    :D


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    #16
    Nodin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 46,938 ✭✭✭✭Nodin


    deandean wrote: »
    The Voice from God in that case was God warning the priest that she is TROUBLE and he should run like hell.

    And judging by the splash in the papers today, God was right.


    God could have told him to make sure he was wearin a rubber raincoat and saved him a lot of trouble. Then again hes catholic, so God probably wouldn't recommend contraception.


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    #17
    endacl
    Registered Users Posts: 22,261 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    fermanagh_man wrote: »
    I always imagined God sounds like Morgan Freeman

    Strangely, I imagine the dulcet tones of Joe Pasquale....


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    #18
    CiDeRmAn
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 34,554 CMod ✭✭✭✭CiDeRmAn


    I prefer my gods to either look like the Roman/Greek pantheon, at least their gods new how to have a good time, and appreciated the virtue of getting hammered and shagging lots of women, admittedly while they looked like a bull or a swan, but hey that's religion for you.


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    #19
    Depraved
    Registered Users Posts: 156 ✭✭Depraved


    He told me not to touch myself. When I told my parish priest about this, he offered me a helping hand.


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    #20
    Temptamperu
    Registered Users Posts: 5,303 ✭✭✭Temptamperu


    Yes, so now ive to take pills that make me constipated :(


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    #21
    Banjo String
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    I know (or knew of) the priest that features in this story, he was parish priest for a few years, back home in my local parish, he was a very likable fella too tbh.

    At the end of the day he's only human, but I find it odd that it was she who showered him with gifts etc, yet it is she who claims was groomed :confused: doesn't an abuser usually do the grooming?

    Also, kinda unfair that he is named and photographed over various newspapers and websites, yet she's unnamed and anonymous. Two middle aged, consenting adults?

    Pardon the pun, but hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.


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    #22
    Ghost Buster
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,172 ✭✭✭Ghost Buster


    kneemos wrote: »
    Who do Muslims call out to?

    If they're into the auld incest then it's probably "AYE SIS!!!!!!!!"


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    #23
    Ghost Buster
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,172 ✭✭✭Ghost Buster


    kneemos wrote: »
    Who do Muslims call out to?

    If they're into the auld incest then it's probably "AYE SIS!!!!!!!!"


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    #24
    BlimpyBoy
    Registered Users Posts: 159 ✭✭BlimpyBoy


    Zombienosh wrote: »
    Handiest break up excuse ever, "eh listen love, god told me to be on me way"

    "It's not you, it's God."


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    #25
    yeppydeppy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,163 ✭✭✭yeppydeppy


    anyone got a link to this?


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    #26
    endacl
    Registered Users Posts: 22,261 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    Ghost Buster wrote: »
    If they're into the auld incest then it's probably "AYE SIS!!!!!!!!"

    *groans*

    :D


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    #27
    Banjo String
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    yeppydeppy wrote: »
    anyone got a link to this?

    http://m.independent.ie/irish-news/irish-woman-claims-she-was-pregnant-following-affair-with-priest-31087208.html


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    #28
    DarkyHughes
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,393 ✭✭✭DarkyHughes


    kneemos wrote: »
    Who do Muslims call out to?

    God, they just have a different name for him.


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    #29
    BBJBIG
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 277 ✭✭BBJBIG


    More Hocus Pocus.
    D'Oirish are still soooooo foooooookin Thick ... :(

    A joke of a peeple and a joke of a cuntry.

    They should let these Kunts get married - since they can't
    keep the mikie in the Trousers.


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    #30
    endacl
    Registered Users Posts: 22,261 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    BBJBIG wrote: »
    More Hocus Pocus.
    D'Oirish are still soooooo foooooookin Thick ... :(

    A joke of a peeple and a joke of a cuntry.

    They should let these Kunts get married - since they can't
    keep the mikie in the Trousers.

    Heh?

    OK...?


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    #31
    shruikan2553
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,113 ✭✭✭shruikan2553


    Remember kids, always ask Jesus/God before having sex

    http://www.funnyjunk.com/Consensual+christ/funny-pictures/5242139


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