Trying to figure out why my English grammars is still so terrible. Tips/Advice?

HisPresence

Hello, I guess I’m want to get to the bottom of “why” my English grammars is still so terrible, and how to improve. Tips or advice for this 30 year olds girl to improve her English grammars?
English is my third language. I'm fluent Chinese, both Mandarin Cantonese, and Japanese.

I do speak fluent English, and I speak English fast too.
I have no trouble communicating with customers at work, my job required greets alot of customers everyday. I speak English with them and they all understand me fine. BUT....

BUT when it come to grammars, I have trouble with ‘past tense’, the English ‘tenses’ stuff.
I am better when write in ‘present tense’, this is due to Chinese language, there no past tenses stuff in Chinese symbol characters.

Background about me. My family immigrant to USA when I was 12, and this year I am 30, so that make me living in the U.S for 18 years already.
I am a college dropped out, I did attended University for 2 years but I quit. I guess I’m not smart, I couldn’t handle work and school.

In that 2 years of University, pretty much I take Calculus and Physic classes. So it didn’t give me a chance of pratice’ English essay’ writing from those classes.
I do have a High School diploma, I did graduate High School in the U.S

I didn’t have a good childhood, my mother was abusive…. So I left my mom house when I was 18, live in the Homeless Shelter for some time too.
I struggle on my own and survived on my own without help from my family.
I became a college dropped out; at the time all I can think of is how to come up with money to pay Rent/Bills, or else I end up in the Homeless Shelter again.

Due to I only have a high school degree, I couldn’t find well pay jobs.
I work in Retail/Sales, Waitress, Secretary, Receptionist at dental office. I also work in Postal services, work at supermarket, I even wash dishes at Asian restaurant too.
But these jobs environment doesn’t help me much with English grammars writing.

So yeah, I’m the college dropped out girl with bad English grammars, and live alone in "the ghetto", a low income area neighborhood…. But I have nothing to be ashamed of myself. I don’t cheat, I don’t steal, I survive with my own working money.

Yes, I’m poor but I don’t feel shameful about myself.... I like to be Financial Independent, I don’t use my husband money, and I don’t depend on anyone.
Though, I admit I have INSECURITY that perhaps IF one day my husband find a richer girl, he will leave me for the richer girl.

I do not like to read books, I don’t watch TV or movies. I an not a romantic person. The books I read in University was Calculus, and Physic books.
And now all I read is different cultures Cook’s book, due to I want to make different culture dishes for my husband to eat.

I guess the reason I don’t read English books, that is why my grammars is bad?....I heard that if you read alot of books, you can see the words of English grammars sentences; your brain get familiar to it, and it help with improve your grammars in writing.

Also, all my jobs that I previous work, including the job I work right now. It doesn’t required me to write any English essays…. It only required me to speak fluent English, which I have no problem with speaking English fluently.

I live in a huge neighborbood that is very diverse ehtnicity, and they ALL speak English here…. None of the neighbors would sit down and write English essays, lol
When we see each others all we do is just speak English…. So I am surrounded by English speakers… I don’t know why my grammars still suck (as in writing English)

I apologize, I know my post is very hard to read… I guess I’m just trying to figure out why my English grammars is still so bad.
I’m married to a husband who is not Chinese…. And eversince I know him, date and married, English is what we speak.
Nope, I don’t write him English essays or love letters, but I have no problem speaking fluent English with him, or using “slang”…. I actually speak Englsih fast and fluently too, but when it come to grammars, it suck!! Argg!!… It kindda make me frustrated!!

I love this forum. I been reading and learning alot from different threads on here, and everyone here so nice and helpful and give great advice.

Oryx

Read more. It doesn't matter what, any kinds of books, newspapers. The more good writing you read, the more you will get a feel for grammar and the flow of the written word.

spurious

Subtitles, known in the US as closed captions might help if you are watching TV or movies, but reading is key, if you cannot attend language classes.

FWVT

I would not worry about your English as a large portion of native English-speakers have absolutely terrible grammar and spelling/punctuation. Mis-use of apostrophes, etc., is something that has become so obvious in the past decade with the increase in texting and social media, and this is something that will only get worse as people migrate to txtspk shorthand and lose any grasp of correct English. I would not recommend using posts on Boards and other such sites as a basis for improving as some posts are just awful.

Your English is fine for a non-native speaker, don't worry.

fleet

English grammar takes work.
You have to make an effort to ensure correctness, reading over what you've just written etc., and using spellcheckers on your computer/phone.

For example, learning which nouns are countable (dogs, cars) and which are not (water, grammar!).

I know it's difficult for a Chinese speaker. No precise tenses, pronouns, etc.

I used to teach English in Shaanxi province. My best students were those that watched a lot of movies, especially with the subtitles turned on.
No, Youku/Sohu translated ones won't do, use western subtitled movies!

Oh, and by the way, most western guys don't care how rich their wives are. Money is as important here as in China, but not in the same way.

arold10

Well, if you came to this country at 12 years old, you should have been very far when it comes down to mastering basic English stuffs. Even a new comer, it doesn't take that long for that person to start mastering things like past tense, present tense, and so forth. All I can say is that you should spend time reading stuffs. Or buy a grammar book that can help you. And there are lot of grammar sites on the internet that are readily accessible, I'd recommend you to start using them.