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Black sheep of the family

  • 07-03-2015 7:42pm
    #1
    moon55
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 45 ✭


    Hi there

    I live at home with my mother. Sometimes I feel as if I don't really belong in the family. The rest of my siblings all stay in contact with each other they text and ring each other all the time but not me.

    I think if I did not live at home I would not have any contact with them as they come to visit my mum I would meet them then. This upsets me a lot. I feel like the odd one like the black sheep of the family.

    I have 3 sisters and a brother and am second youngest.

    I know the older ones have kids and are busy but still they manager to keep in contact with each why not me?

    I would try to make more an effort myself but feel as if I would be annoying them and I don't think some of them like me much anyway as they think I am a little bit odd or something maybe I am a bit different alright I suppose.

    Advice please.


Comments

  • #2
    Rubberchikken
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,096 ✭✭✭Rubberchikken


    If you don't keep in touch they might think you're too busy and mightn't want to be 'bothering' you.

    I think it takes both sides to keep in touch.

    What was your relationship like with them when ye were younger?


  • #3
    moon55
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 45 ✭moon55


    Ok I suppose. Well there was one sister and we could not stand each other fighting all the time still can't spend too much time together to be honest. She sent me a birthday card and see I don't know where I stand then with her. I think she hates me but then she does that so I do not know.


  • #4
    DoozerT6
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,593 ✭✭✭DoozerT6


    Well, the first thing that struck me is, if you're still living at home, maybe they think that by them visiting home and keeping in contact with your mam (I'm guessing they do this?) then they're keeping in touch with you as well, as you're still there with her. You may find that if you were to move out for whatever reason, they would keep in touch with you more, as they don't have the intermediary of your mother to almost be the 'glue' between yourself and the rest of them, if that makes sense?

    As for you contacting them, I really don't think you'd be annoying them as long as you don't keep them for hours at a time on the phone - or even if they're within a reasonable distance, you could ring and say, 'hey, I'll be in town on Saturday, will I call in for a quick cuppa and say hi to the kids?' Maybe suggest meeting a couple of them for lunch some day at a time that suits all of you...

    I guess if you don't try, you'll never know! Good luck.


  • #5
    orlyice
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 222 ✭✭orlyice


    Well op they might feel you don't want to be in contact with them, especially when you said yourself you don't make an effort. And they see you when they come to visit your mother, so they mightn't see the need to ring you, they get to chat when they are home.

    How about you set up a viber/what's app group that you and all your siblings are part of, that way you can keep in contact with them all at the same time and can find out what's going on in their lives, and you can share things about your life too.


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