Good looking bloke - no joy with tinder or another site I've used

LegacyUser

I am v. good looking - I do know that!

I broke up with my girlfriend a while ago (was my decision) and now I want someone else to be with me and my dog....nights are the worst......horrible.....one of my friends is on holidays and there isn't really anyone one around these days so I'm kind of isolated!

I think if you go out with the intention of finding a woman - you will end up coming across wrong. It's better to go out and concentrate on having a great night with friends. That's when the person you want will notice you and see you for what you are.....more or less rules that one out though. i've tried some other things....

I've never tried speed dating. Besides that I want someone now, right now......

maybe this loneliness doesn't last forever though?

Stench Blossoms

Doesn't matter how gorgeous you are if your personality/attitude stinks.

no.panic neva.panic

temproaryquell wrote: »

I am v. good looking - I do know that!

I want someone else to be with me and my dog....

I want someone now, right now......

Figure out what is wrong with these 3 statements, work on yourself to fix the underlying attitude, and chances are your luck will change.

santana75

Stench Blossoms wrote: »

Doesn't matter how gorgeous you are if your personality/attitude stinks.

I dont understand why you'd reply like that. Are you trying to say the OP's attitude stinks? His attitude seems fine to me

temproaryquell wrote: »

I am v. good looking - I do know that!

I broke up with my girlfriend a while ago (was my decision) and now I want someone else to be with me and my dog....nights are the worst......horrible.....one of my friends is on holidays and there isn't really anyone one around these days so I'm kind of isolated!

I think if you go out with the intention of finding a woman - you will end up coming across wrong. It's better to go out and concentrate on having a great night with friends. That's when the person you want will notice you and see you for what you are.....more or less rules that one out though. i've tried some other things....

I've never tried speed dating. Besides that I want someone now, right now......

maybe this loneliness doesn't last forever though?

I think the problem here isnt a lack of a girlfriend it seems to be the way you've orchestrated your life in such a way that you feel isolated or that you feel like you have to be with someone "right now". Id forget about trying to get a girlfriend and concentrate and living your own life to the point where youre happy by yourself. I know thats a cliche and all but its true, you cant put your happiness in the hands of another person, it doesnt work. Do something you'd like to do such as playing football(if youre interested in that) or whatever, just follow your passions and get to know and like yourself. Thats the foundation upon which everything is built, having a relationshp is like the icing on the cake, its a bonus not the source of your happiness.

Lollipops23

santana75 wrote: »

I dont understand why you'd reply like that. Are you trying to say the OP's attitude stinks? His attitude seems fine to me



I think the problem here isnt a lack of a girlfriend it seems to be the way you've orchestrated your life in such a way that you feel isolated or that you feel like you have to be with someone "right now". Id forget about trying to get a girlfriend and concentrate and living your own life to the point where youre happy by yourself. I know thats a cliche and all but its true, you cant put your happiness in the hands of another person, it doesnt work. Do something you'd like to do such as playing football(if youre interested in that) or whatever, just follow your passions and get to know and like yourself. Thats the foundation upon which everything is built, having a relationshp is like the icing on the cake, its a bonus not the source of your happiness.

Think it's more that the initial post does come off as being a bit...aggressive in tone?

OP, I know it's cheesy as hell to say but you need to happy in your own skin before you can open yourself to a healthy and lasting relationship. Take it from someone who knows. Focus on yourself and growing as a person before actively seeking someone out. Confidence and self assurance are two of the most attractive things in a person

santana75

Lollipops23 wrote: »

Think it's more that the initial post does come off as being a bit...aggressive in tone?

I dunno maybe I didnt pick up on that. The impression I got was that the OP was looking for answers in the wrong places, thats all.

strobe

The golden rule is that you have to make them feel like it's specifically them you are interested in. It has to come across that there is something special about them that you just don't see in other women, and so they've grabbed your interest in a way all the rest of them haven't. It doesn't have to be full on or over the top, just the vague impression you give. That applies equally if you are looking for just a bit of fun or if you are seeking a relationship.

Not just that you want "a woman" and want one now, and well they're a woman and they're there right now, so that'll do, and if not them, sure one of the others.

Your post gives the impression in the second paragraph rather than the first. If that's bleeding through in your interactions you're going to have the odds stacked against you.

RedemptionZ

OP do you live in Dublin? Tinder is based primarily on looks so if you aren't having much luck there then you either are saying all the wrong things or aren't as good looking as you think you are! Maybe in the country there's not as much to choose from but in Dublin anyway it's pretty easy to get a lot of matches, albeit it is more for the younger ones.

I don't think your attitude stinks, but you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and start socialising. There's loads of stuff on if you look for it. Join a few clubs and before you know it you'll have loads of friends to go out with.

DoYouEvenLift

Meeting people in real life is much easier than online. There are too many idiots online on there "only for the laugh" or "my friends forced me into this" with absolutely no intention of actually meeting anyone, they just want the attention and seolf esteem boost. It sucks too because there actually are a lot of genuinely nice and cool people to meet on online dating too, but they're just overwhelmed by the prior and you end up wasting time looking for them to the point where one just ends up thinking "why bother?"


Best thing to do is expand your social circle constantly, get friends with mutual friends and then get friends with their friends and so on. This WILL lead to meeting women you're interested in. Just be as sociable as possible.