Really Angry....

catonthewire

A few months ago I went through a really tough patch in my life, my depression returned plus I got into some financial difficulty...

My family were very supportive ( those that knew ) and I personaly was determined to get my life together....
Now my life is great, yes there are days that I struggle but I stay positive...

The problem is my brother, he is a few years older than me and can be abrasive and downright insulting...
Earlier today he publicly humiliated me, I don't want to go into all the details but it was linked to one of my past problems...
He did this in a shop in front of an assistant...
I was absolutely humiliated.....

I left and was waiting for my son to collect me, inside my stomach was in knots, my brother lives at home and this isn't the first time he has behaved to a family member like this,he's somewhat of a bully....

Now I've had enough!!...
I simply didn't acknowledge his leaving the shop., but will see him at Mums in a few days..
Any advice on how to handle the situation, I don't want a row but feel he has no right to make my business public...

JAMES VI

I dunno. I'd say be calm and composed and articulate to him your displeasure at his behaviour. Stay focused and don't bite his sh*t. He'll not expect it so will probably be his usual abrasive self; but you gotta stay focused and on point, and be respectful - don't lose focus. He may apologise - that would be great, but if you play it to the point, in an articulate and respectful way (even if he has been acting in a manner that isn't deserving of respect) that's all you can do really. In my modern human opinion anyway.

Having said that, I would like to also express the thoughts of my ancient ape self. Part of me wants to tell you do the exact opposite to the above. If he snaps at you - snap right back. Tell him you're trying to get your sh*t together and he should have a bit of respect!

But where will this lead to in the end? More sh*t being thrown around the place most likely.

I say go with my modern human opinion. If you act dignified and respectful to people, you remove their option to legitimately throw sh*t at you. If they are still throwing sh*t at you, they ARE in the wrong, make no mistake. Keep YOURSELF under control and focus entirely on you.

Fair play to you for keeping positive!

catonthewire

Thanks James some really great advice thanks..

He does have a bad temper and plays into hoping for a volatile reaction from those he annoys, so many family members even extended can't tolerate him...
So I will simply tell him that I won't tolerate him humiliating me, my Mum is quite frail and I wouldn't want her upset...

Really glad I didn't react in the shop or outside, now I can also cool down ..