is it sad that I have to travel solo all the time?

LegacyUser

So I just arrived in bangkok for the 3rd time in the space of a year - and all 3 times have been alone. I would love to have loads of friends to share the experience with but I don't. The very few friends I do have are tied down in relationships , have no money or don't share my interest for travel. Being honest, this is my 3rd solo trip and I find it very lonely at times. Now for example I'm off to walk around Bangkok on my own. I wish I could be that solo traveller who walks into a hostel and instantaneously makes friends. But I'm not at all, I'm very shy. Just wondering some of your opinions? Am I better off going alone to these places despite the loneliness or is it a bit sad to always have to experience new places alone?

LegacyUser

Why did you go there again? The world is so big and beautiful and you keep going to the same place?
Also... you are luckly you didnt return with a tiny woman in your suitcase lol
Jokes apart there must be a forum for travelling related topics, a perfect place for you to find travel mates.
I dont mind travelling solo within Europe but have been postponing a trip to Califa and Oz because I also have no one to join me. I have a couple friends who love travelling as much as a I do and dont miss an opportunity but our timing is completely different - not to mention financial resources.

skallywag

Why have you retuned to the same place three times in one year if it's making you feel this way?

LegacyUser

skallywag wrote: »

Why have you retuned to the same place three times in one year if it's making you feel this way?

Because travel is my main passion and Thailand is an amazing country, I just unfortunately have to do it alone all the time

zoobizoo

solotraveller wrote: »

The very few friends I do have are tied down in relationships , have no money or don't share my interest for travel. ..............
I wish I could be that solo traveller who walks into a hostel and instantaneously makes friends.

Firstly, find friends who are interested in travel, are single and have money.

Secondly, solo travellers walking into hostels and making "friends" immediately rarely happens. What you find is that those who talk to other people make the effort to talk to other people.

Thirdly, people in hostels are always up for meeting people. You might spend the first day on your own but you need tactics to get chatting to people and then say to them "I'm thinking of heading to X place tomorrow..... would you be interested?" or "What are you guys up to tomorrow?" . "How're you finding the book?".....

It works... believe me as I did it many many times.

What are you doing in Bangkok? I spent many weeks there before. If you're waiting to head off somewhere else then just accept that it's the start of your journey and that you'll soon meet many like minded people as yourself. Cities are lonely places to travel in.

Stavro Mueller

Would you consider going on an organised holiday then? The sort that takes small groups? I've friends who've gone on those by themselves and found them good. Something like this lot: http://www.intrepidtravel.com/ (I am in no way advertising them by the way. I'm typing on a phone and they were the first name that popped into my head)

I've done a few solo trips and had a great time
But there are places that organise people into groups for travelling and it sounds like that might be a good idea for you

miamee

OP I have gone on many trips alone at this stage and if my choices are to either go alone or not go at all, I will almost always go alone. Last yeasr for the first time I went with an organised group - we made our own way to the starting point (in this case Budapest) and we all headed off together for a week - it was great fun and the only thing we *had* to do together was be on the bus and a dinner the first night in each place really. The rest of the time was yours to do with as you pleased and most of the time breakfast would consist of us all asking what we were all doing that day and then deciding to go see things together if we were interested in the same thing. I'd recommend trying it out, I'm definitely going to do it again

Tokyo

OP - I'm pretty much in the same position as you are - I travel quite a lot, and nearly always alone. While there are times where it can be lonely, for the most part I enjoy the freedom to plot my own course. There's a big difference between being lonely, and being alone, and a lot of it is down to how you can approach the situation.

My recommendation would be to take solace in the time you get to spend alone, but also push yourself a little into meeting new people, on your terms. I've spent quite a bit of time where you are right now, and you don't have to be a party animal to meet new people. Take look on the hostel noticeboards - there's near always notes there from other solo travellers who are looking to organise a small group to head north towards Pai or Chang Mai. See what events are on locally too - on one trip there I signed up for a Thai cookery course, and met people there with similar interests, who I still keep in touch with from time to time. Diving courses are also very popular there, and a weekend on a dive boat is a great way to meet other travellers.

Long story short - enjoy your time alone, but being a little proactive in meeting new people goes a long way.

Rubberchikken

i envy you your ability to head off solo and see any part of this world:)

there are loads of solo travellers out there. you just need to get chatting at every opportunity.

a lot of people won't be the first to start the conversation for fear of many things. be brave and be the first. it'll get easier the more people you chat too and who knows what'll happen - only good:)

have a great trip

santana75

Op this really is a matter of perspective. You are in such a great position, to have the freedom to travel to anywhere in the world you like and do your own thing. Trust me there are so many married with children people I know who would absolutely love to cut lose and take off to explore another country by themselves. You have something great, but youre just not seeing it, you're interpreting your situation as negative and thats a choice. You can choose to see this as something to be cherished and valued, to have freedom like that is awesome.

meeeeh

Out of all countries I've been to, I found Thailand the most awkward to meet new people. There were three of us traveling together and we interacted very little with other travelers. I travelled with the same people to some other destinations and we always met loads of other people.

The type of cheap accommodation in Thailand isn't great for meeting new people and I found trekking and snorkelling or other organised activities the most sociable. But that was 15 years ago.

Wanderer2010

OP, it definitely isnt sad to travel alone and the perception is kept up a lot by people who cant bear their own company and simply "have" to have somebody with them to have on holiday.Never mind that arguments ruin a lot of holidays and friendships, never mind that you often get to miss out on seeing certain things when you compromise for other people.

I have traveled alone for most of my holidays as my few friends either cant afford it or have no interest in the countries I visit. Being alone on a holiday gives you lots of freedom to dictate your own itinerary and you can get chatting to locals etc at almost all attractions, no pressure to take it further. I would agree with the above poster on a holiday which brings you together for a dinner and breakfast daily and the rest you can do what you want. That should satisfy your tourist needs and get you meeting new people!

LegacyUser

OP whats the alternative? Sitting at home waiting for other people so you can go? It's super hard to arrange regular trips with the same people or find enough people that have the time and means to travel regularly.

I've two friends who share my passion for travel and we use to travel together but it just became so hard to plan so that our dates would match and we'd all have the money to go. We tired to sort a trip to Peru last year and it ended up not happening cus we couldn't find dates that worked for everyone and it was so frustrating as I ended up going no where at all sitting around waiting for other people.

I think it's far sadder to sit at home waiting to go then just getting up and going.

zoobizoo

meeeeh wrote: »

Out of all countries I've been to, I found Thailand the most awkward to meet new people. There were three of us traveling together and we interacted very little with other travelers. I travelled with the same people to some other destinations and we always met loads of other people.

The type of cheap accommodation in Thailand isn't great for meeting new people and I found trekking and snorkelling or other organised activities the most sociable. But that was 15 years ago.

Have to agree with this...

When I've travelled through Europe and stayed in hostels I met new people all the time. It's harder to meet people in Bangkok as every one has rooms to themselves and there aren't many communal areas