No band or DJ after wedding meal

Cindy85

Hi, my fiancée and I are having a very small immediate family only low key wedding. We are having a ceremony in a hotel followed by a meal in the same hotel. Do you think it's ok not to have either a band or DJ and just let the guests slip off when they want / have a drink in the residents bar afterwards? Is this seen as cheap?

A bit weird but it's your day. Make sure that people know in advance though to avoid confusion as it's out of the ordinary

fits

We considered this. My family and friends would be talkers rather than dancers (even though I love dancing myself but my music is not to everyones taste). The thought of a really lively band playing to an empty dancefloor filled me with dread, and I really strongly dislike most live bands.

In the end we decided to get a band which play more low key stuff as well as more lively. They are not at all loud. Mostly instrumental and a little offbeat. People can dance if they want to but if they dont it want be too odd either. They play the kind of music which is vaguely familiar to most people but not the usual tunes. Thinking of it more as entertainment than anything else.

googled eyes

My brother in law did this. Only immediate family (+ kids) and two god father's families attended the wedding.

There were two large tables for the dinner, which every sat around at until after 11. Then anyone who wanted to continue drinking went to the residents bar.

Every one enjoyed the meal, it was a different, relaxed wedding and everyone enjoyed the weekend together.

Do what makes you and your partner happy.

willow tree

I've never heard of this. Music is nice to set an ambiance, even on an iPod or maybe the bar will play music?

Cindy85

Thanks. I would tell all as they are family... I guess I just think that a band/Dj for 16 adults is a bit of a waste for all concerned...

cute_cow

We had a very small wedding too, about 40-45 people. We didn't bother with a band, but we did have a DJ. To be honest, most people sat and chatted and didn't dance. Kinda felt like it was a slight waste. If I did it again, I possibly wouldn't have bothered with music to be honest.
At the end of the day, do what makes you and your husband to be happy. It is your day and not anyone elses.
Congrats by the way!

fits

Cindy85 wrote: »

Thanks. I would tell all as they are family... I guess I just think that a band/Dj for 16 adults is a bit of a waste for all concerned...

Hah, sounds nice and chilled. Yeah I probably wouldnt bother with anything then.

SmokeyEyes

fits wrote: »

Hah, sounds nice and chilled. Yeah I probably wouldnt bother with anything then.

We're playing an IPod playlist of good tunes, it's always a handy option?

Cindy85

Thanks for all your advice and kind words... Some food for thought as well with iPods and alternative bands... Or nothing as already discussed...

foxy farmer

I've only one complaint about bands and DJs at weddings- the bloody volume. No need for it to be so loud. Last wedding i was at i spent over 2 hrs talking to a man in his 80s far from the function room. We both couldn't stick the noise. My neighbour that night was hoarse from trying to hold conversation over the music. Older people like to chat and usually clear off when the music gets the best of them. If the crowd is small i see nothing wrong with no live music

fits

foxy farmer wrote: »

I've only one complaint about bands and DJs at weddings- the bloody volume. No need for it to be so loud. Last wedding i was at i spent over 2 hrs talking to a man in his 80s far from the function room. We both couldn't stick the noise. My neighbour that night was hoarse from trying to hold conversation over the music. Older people like to chat and usually clear off when the music gets the best of them. If the crowd is small i see nothing wrong with no live music

Agree 100%. Annoys the hell out of me too.

moral

Cindy85 I was at a wedding small about 30 guests, the B&G wanted a low key day. They were already living in their house and had a child. We were told that it was just going to be a wedding cermony and a meal afterwards in a restaurant. There was a full menu the meal was spot on. Very enjoyable relaxed day, there was a pub attached to the restaurant and there was a ceili on that night, the B&G did not expect this, it was organised by the restaurant/pub the craic was mighty.

moral

Cindy85 I was at a wedding small about 30 guests, the B&G wanted a low key day. They were already living in their house and had a child. We were told that it was just going to be a wedding cermony and a meal afterwards in a restaurant. There was a full menu the meal was spot on. Very enjoyable relaxed day, there was a pub attached to the restaurant and there was a ceili on that night, the B&G did not expect this, it was organised by the restaurant/pub the craic was mighty.

PS I hope you have a great day whatever you decide to do.

Cindy85

Thanks fits for the pm... Wow they're great! Nice atmospheric laid-back tunes!

clint_silver

Ive been to a couple of small weddings that went on elsewhere after, a nightclub that had an area reserved, only too happy to have 100 people turning up on a thursday night

other one had an acoustic guy banging out tunes, not irish ceili stuff but all well known stuff, was great.

no harm in it whatsoever, dont be worried in the slightest.

Tarzana2

foxy farmer wrote: »

I've only one complaint about bands and DJs at weddings- the bloody volume. No need for it to be so loud. Last wedding i was at i spent over 2 hrs talking to a man in his 80s far from the function room. We both couldn't stick the noise. My neighbour that night was hoarse from trying to hold conversation over the music. Older people like to chat and usually clear off when the music gets the best of them. If the crowd is small i see nothing wrong with no live music

Yeah, the music was way too loud at my sister's wedding. My mother and aunts wanted to continue dancing but the noise drove them off the dancefloor. It's not good if the band are causing the dancefloor to empty rather than fill it!

Cindy85

Ya clint_silver I was thinking this would be a good way to go... Guy with guitar that is... Not too loud but still provides entertainment

Arbiter of Good Taste

I was at something similar, and the bride and groom had - I think it was - Manila Strings playing in the corner. They were fantastic. They weren't too loud, so people could chat away, and they were great entertainment if you just wanted to sit back and listen.

lazygal

I was recently at a wedding that sounds similar to this, it was low key civil ceremony with family meal afterwards, and then a section in a hotel. The couple had a guy with a guitar playing music on his own and it was lovely. They didn't want a dancing session or a sing song so it suited their day perfectly.