Dead-ended career and brain

castaway_lady

I thought a lot about how to explain this and in a nutshell Ive lost my work mojo!
Im a teacher (FE mainly + 3 periods of TY) and I am bored senseless (& too stressed at times too). My brain is bored, its fedup of dumbing stuff down to try to force it into the heads of the unmotivated. I love my subject area and constantly stay up to date with it out of pure interest. I spend a fair amount of money on travelling to conferences and seminars and workshops and end these days feeling mentally alive- the complete opposite of the typical working day. I go home feeling envious of the academics presenting them who are so engaged by their day to day work.
This is affecting my life outside of work even beyond the time put into preparing classes. I dread Mondays and count bells to the end of the day and end of the week, term etc. I have zero desire to move into school management positions and am feeling dead-end-ed after nearly 10years in the job and too many left.

Rubberchikken

i remember what's it like to be in a job you hate and the clock watching and wishing away the day is soul destroying.

are you job hunting? are there any opportunities to apply for a position in your chosen field anywhere in the country or are you restricted by family life?

Kidchameleon

You need to train up and get out for your own sake and for the sake of your students. They don't deserve that. Its never too late to move on.

castaway_lady

Im "trained up" to MSc level and also have a higher diploma in a related area. As for the students "don't deserve that"....they get Rolls Royce classes delivered-latest info on everything, hell Ive even found fulltime jobs for 28 of them in 4 years. I don't let my boredom and stress show in the classroom. I try to take it by the scruff of the neck every day to deliver.

Im just sick of chasing attendance problems and excuses etc . My brain is dead from it! It makes me question if im capable of anything more anymore. I am on the job lookout, while I do have some location restrictions, Im fairly well located to commute to a number of areas. I suppose Im wondering if this job has just run its course now or if I could salvage it or what to move on to? I don't want to end up worse off but I most definitely don't want to waste years of cv building and education and my own potential to stay looking at those who don't give a damn about their potential.

LLMMML

You sound very resentful towards your students who you perceive as not caring about their own success. I'm not sure what FE is but I presume TY is transition year so you're dealing with kids basically. I think you have to recognise that these are not adults that have chosen to pursue their education but children that are just there because they have to be. You're never going to get an entire class of alert, engaged people, and it's not really their fault.

You seemed to think conferences and research is exciting, so perhaps look into a PHD. I personally think people look at PHDs with rose tinted glasses and it's nothing like what you expect, but maybe it is for you.

Stavro Mueller

Only you can answer for sure whether you feel the job has run its course. From what I'm reading, it certainly looks like it. I think most people get fed up of their jobs at some stage or at least go through phases where they're sick of it. You seem to be burned out and have interests that lie elsewhere. Seeing as you're trained up to MSc level and have a higher diploma, I'd have thought you'd be in a good position to get another job. I think you should continue job hunting and worry about what to do next if you're offered another job. In the meantime, you've still got your existing job to fall back on. If you start feeling better about it in the meantime, then all you have to do is stop sending out the CVs.

castaway_lady

I have 3 classes of transition years for a short module, that's fine, it's practical based and you know what you're getting with ty. They actually engage more than the FE (Further Ed/PLC) students who are meant to have chosen their study area. Yea I would agree that burn out is there, if definitely was up to Christmas holidays. That's rampant in our college at the moment, with 2 out on certified stress leave in the last 12 months a couple of colleagues in the midst of it at the moment.

I suppose the last 2+ years Ive been on this slope and trying to get off it and thinking it would pass but it's concerning me now that it hasn't gone away. Im wondering if/ how people push through it. Over Christmas I thought a lot about it all and became clear on where the buzz is for me and I still love my subject area, I used to thrive on engaging with students who were into that too and helping them move forward, im just not a babysitter and that's what the job has become.
e.g. who wants to hear from an 18/19year old fellas mammy with trivial excuses for instance? Seven times last term!

sashafierce

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