Frequent night waking

deh983

Hi all. I have posted here a few times about different things so apologies if people are getting fed up of me.
As the title suggests I am having terrible trouble with my little man. (9 months on Sunday) I just cannot get him to sleep long stretches at night. The last few nights are the worst with him waking every 2 hours. When he wakes he cries I leave him for a few minutes go in, lie him back down and he goes straight to sleep again. I don't feed, pick him up or even talk to him.
I have started to do a bit of sleep training with him as I was rubbing his hand/face to get him to sleep. Now he will settle himself once I stay in the room and I am gradually getting closer to the door every night. This is going ok. He used to wake half an hour after going down and now will settle himself in the first few hours but will wake around 11/12.
I have tried everything from more food before bed, sleeping bags, less blankets, more blankets, bed half an hour earlier. I've tried it all.
He is the happiest chap during the day. Takes 2 naps totalling 3 hours. 3 8oz bottles & 3 meals.
He goes down around 8/8:30 & is up around 7/7:30.
The only other thing I can think is that he is in lactose free formula since 1 month and recently we have started to introduce cows milk very slowly. Maybe this isn't agreeing with him???
I suppose I'm just looking for some help/advice as I am seriously doubting myself as a parent lately. My oh is working away at the minute so I'm dealing with this on my own. I'm back to work in 2 weeks and just don't know how I will cope.

Apologies for such a long post but I just don't know what to do anymore.

lazygal

Cows milk isn't recommended as a stand alone drink for babies under 12 months. I'd probably stop giving that anyway.
Other than that he could be going through a development leap or just be a restless or light sleeper. I'd stop going in every time he wakes and let him try to get himself back to sleep.

lolademmers

Poor you it sounds rough at the moment for you. I didn't give my son cows milk until 12 months so maybe hold off on that for a couple of months? Have you tried co sleeping or is that a route you don't want to go down?

pwurple

My ten month did the exact same thing a few weeks ago. I think it's a developmental leap. I tried water or rubbing her tummy... but after two or three nights of it I just left her to settler herself for a few minutes. She went back to sleep herself.

We are not on cows milk yet.

ps, am also working, and I know it's very stressful coming up to the day you'll restart.

deh983

lazygal wrote: »

Cows milk isn't recommended as a stand alone drink for babies under 12 months. I'd probably stop giving that anyway.
Other than that he could be going through a development leap or just be a restless or light sleeper. I'd stop going in every time he wakes and let him try to get himself back to sleep.

Sorry I should have said we were only giving it to him in his breakfast not his bottles. I've tried that and he cries so hard he nearly gets sick.

lolademmers

Have a look at wonder weeks it gives developmental leaps he might be in the middle of one.

pwurple

deh983 wrote: »

Sorry I should have said we were only giving it to him in his breakfast not his bottles. I've tried that and he cries so hard he nearly gets sick.

Oh right, yes we do that too.

It sounds like a developmental leap. It will pass. Try to stick it out another while, you're not doing anything wrong. They just do this from time to time.

lolademmers

Worse feeling in the world when you think you're doing something wrong and especially when you're on your own. Hope it passes soon for you. You will be going to work for a break haha!!

deh983

Have the wonder weeks app and isn't in a leap at the minute. Unfortunately he's been like this for a long time. He has maybe slept 10 nights in the 9 months. I know there's a sleep regression around this time but it feels like he's been in one since he was born!!!!!!!

kandr10

The no cry sleep solution book is good. It seems you already do some of the things that's recommended in it so the overall 'philosophy' might suit you and give you a few more things to try.

Suucee

Deh we both have appeared on each others post a few times re soothers etc. My boy was 9 mnths on 30th dec. And sounds just like your guy. I reckon he started his last leap early tbh. But like u ive tried everything. My guy eats alot more too but still not great. . He has good nights and bad nights. He will get there eventually im sure.

deh983

Thanks all for the replies. I just needed to have a rant this morning.
Suucee yes I think we are dealing with the same thing!! Please god it will sort itself out sooner rather than later.

contrary_mary

I think I'm a couple of months behind you and succee! I have a bad eater/sleeper. He has gone through the night a handful of times but generally wakes a few times and needs me to pat his belly to get back - and he had been self-settling at bedtime for months! At least you get decent naps - mine wakes like clockwork after 30 minutes. I had him in a schedule of 3 x 30min naps a day but the last week he has been really resistant to them! I'm also pulling my hair out so you have my sympathies! I'm tired!

DoctorBoo

contrary_mary wrote: »

I think I'm a couple of months behind you and succee! I have a bad eater/sleeper. He has gone through the night a handful of times but generally wakes a few times and needs me to pat his belly to get back - and he had been self-settling at bedtime for months! At least you get decent naps - mine wakes like clockwork after 30 minutes. I had him in a schedule of 3 x 30min naps a day but the last week he has been really resistant to them! I'm also pulling my hair out so you have my sympathies! I'm tired!

Hi guys. I am at the other side of this. My 14 month old occasionally sleeps through the night, but usually wakes at least twice.
When she was 4 months old she started waking several times during the night. Sometimes more than seven times.... also she only had short naps during the day. Like a half an hour each. We tried loads of different approaches and nothing worked. I gave up after a couple of months.... I was exhausted! Eventually, I just brought her into the bed with me when she woke - and do you know what.... it improved the situation. She slept more and longer. We slept more and longer. And we stepped back from the brink of insanity!!
When she started walking her sleeping improved dramatically. And we got more rest.
The main thing to remember is that some of them just aren't sleepers and no amount of "training" will chAnge that. Once I managed to accept that, life got easier.

contrary_mary

DoctorBoo wrote: »

The main thing to remember is that some of them just aren't sleepers and no amount of "training" will chAnge that. Once I managed to accept that, life got easier.

Thanks! I've also lost the will to try with the naps and generally go for the path of least resistance which is to pop him into the buggy and get out walking. I also know he's just not a good sleeper and to be honest it's not a surprise as I'm not either. I wake several times in the night myself and have done for many many years - in fact i think the last time I "slept through" may have been in my early teens!

deh983

The thing I can't get my head around is that he is a great napper (probably jinxed it now) & goes down easy at night. No fighting crying nothing.
I have often brought him into our bed but to be honest it's not what I want in the long run.
Last night was turning into the worst night ever. At 3:30 it was my 5th time up & my partner happened to be here last night. He said just leave him. He cried for less than 10 mins fell back asleep till 7. I brought him in with me for a cuddle & he slept again till 8:30!!!!!

The guilt was awful hearing him cry but it had to be done. I'm on my own tonight now so I don't know whether I'll have the strength to do it on my own. He's probably so used to me going into him as soon as he wakes.

Hope ye had an ok night last night.

contrary_mary

deh983 wrote: »

The thing I can't get my head around is that he is a great napper (probably jinxed it now) & goes down easy at night. No fighting crying nothing.
I have often brought him into our bed but to be honest it's not what I want in the long run.
Last night was turning into the worst night ever. At 3:30 it was my 5th time up & my partner happened to be here last night. He said just leave him. He cried for less than 10 mins fell back asleep till 7. I brought him in with me for a cuddle & he slept again till 8:30!!!!!

The guilt was awful hearing him cry but it had to be done. I'm on my own tonight now so I don't know whether I'll have the strength to do it on my own. He's probably so used to me going into him as soon as he wakes.

Hope ye had an ok night last night.

Oh that's good that you got some sleep anyway. We had a terrible night, he seemed to have loads of wind (farting loads) and I think his teeth are at him too. I tend to go into him as soon as I hear a peep so I probably need to get strong too. I hate letting him cry though.

At least I got a good nap out of him this afternoon - he fights and fights it but I was so knackered after last night that I lay down with him after lunch and he's had a good hour and a half. I'm stuck in the bedroom though as I'm scared he'll wake and make his way off the bed (even though he's blocked in with pillows).

Chemical Byrne

You could try putting the shirt you were wearing that day over him under or over his blanket. He'll get the smell of you and it might comfort him.

John Mason

in 8.5 months, my babadook has slept through once.

last night, he woke at 10pm and didnt go back until 1am and was up again 5am.

i am absolutely at the end of my tether. i really cant cope anymore. i am nearly afraid to drive because my concentration is so low

i am hoping when i go back to work, the creche will tire him out

contrary_mary

John Mason wrote: »

i am hoping when i go back to work, the creche will tire him out

Same! I think it could be wishful thinking though... my fella is absolutely knackered tonight but he's already woken once!

I went off for a few hours this morning on my own after a tough week and it's made all the difference - just to get out by myself and look in the shops and have a cuppa. I'm going to try and do it more often now until I go back to work.

deh983

John Mason wrote: »

in 8.5 months, my babadook has slept through once.

last night, he woke at 10pm and didnt go back until 1am and was up again 5am.

i am absolutely at the end of my tether. i really cant cope anymore. i am nearly afraid to drive because my concentration is so low

i am hoping when i go back to work, the creche will tire him out

I'm the very same. To top it all off he is now teething which means runny nose & general out of sorts so all the good work I had done is now undone.
The only thing that has worked is letting him cry a bit. I didn't want to go down that route but I couldn't take it anymore. I don't let him cry for any longer than 10 mins and he has went back asleep himself since I started doing it.

I'm back to work in 10 days and have over a 2 hour round trip so I needed to get something sorted. Even though he is waking I don't have to get up as often. Last night he only woke twice at 1:30 & 5 and I brought him into our bed at 5 as he is under the weather and wanted to give him a cuddle.

Hope it all settled down for us all shortly.

Fingers crossed!!!!

galah

Yeah. Babba will be one next week, has never slept more than six hours in one go, and i can count the days he did that. I'm a delight in work, i can tell ya! :cool: Wrecked doesnt begin to describe it, and i just dont know what to do anymore either. Cant let babba shout at night cause that would wake his brother, and he's a demon if he doesnt get enough sleep.

Never looked forward to a week away with work so much - dont mind crazy 15 hour work days if i get more than three hours sleep,in one stretch in return

John Mason

I let him cry once for 10 minutes. When I went into him, he was so stressed out that his babygro and hair was soaking wet and he had been sick.

Never ever again. I cried for about an hour myself after that. I felt like the worst mother in the world. My tiny baby just wanted me and I completely abandoned him. He hadn't a clue what was going on.

Have been doing the no cry sleep solution with varying degrees of success.

He is just out of leap 6 but has two more bottom teeth coming up. It's never ending

deh983

Yea my lad doesn't cry that hard. It's more mooching around and the odd little cry. Sometimes i think he stands up in the cot still asleep and then wakes up & doesn't know where he is!!!
I couldn't ignore him if he was really roaring. No way.
I think it's more of a comfort thing with him as whenever we do go in & lie him down he is out like a light again.

lolademmers

Sounds like you are making progress deh1983 so well done. I'm the same with letting him cry it out he was hysterical so never again but as your little lad is just have little cries that's great. That's half the battle I think!

RentDayBlues

My 11 month old has only slept through once, my first slept through from 4 months so this is torture! She will wake at 5 take a feed and go back to sleep til 7:30, this was working as it was just once. She then decided about a month ago that 5 was her new get up time and nothing would persuade her otherwise

I decided last night that I wasn't doing it anymore, so she woke at 5, I didn't go in, just watched her on the monitor. She mooched for 6 mins and fell asleep! This was repeated twice more but thankfully she fell fully back to sleep until 8 when the toddler woke her!

Lesson to me: my 11 month doesn't need a night feed anymore, the toddler can sleep through most noise and that if I leave the baby alone she will self settle in a short space of time! Night 1 done, now to persevere!

deh983

lolademmers wrote: »

Sounds like you are making progress deh1983 so well done. I'm the same with letting him cry it out he was hysterical so never again but as your little lad is just have little cries that's great. That's half the battle I think!

Thanks!! It's really makes a difference only getting up twice compared to at least 10 times!! He is teething now and has runny nose etc so I'm trying to stick to the routine as much as possible while at the same time giving him the comfort he needs.

Fingers crossed it works

Claire de Lune

No advice, but I am another one in the same boat :-( Our 9 months old slept through the night about 5 times since he was born and wakes multiple times at night. Same as you, it's just a little cry each time, nothing wrong with him at all.

We had some success following the no cry sleep solution, ie he would only wake once, and just caressing his head for a few minutes would send him back to sleep. But he's been unwell the past week, so we were picking him up at night as he needed the comfort of our arms and now that he's better we are back to square one!

I need strong coffee!

deh983

Claire de Lune wrote: »

No advice, but I am another one in the same boat :-( Our 9 months old slept through the night about 5 times since he was born and wakes multiple times at night. Same as you, it's just a little cry each time, nothing wrong with him at all.

We had some success following the no cry sleep solution, ie he would only wake once, and just caressing his head for a few minutes would send him back to sleep. But he's been unwell the past week, so we were picking him up at night as he needed the comfort of our arms and now that he's better we are back to square one!

I need strong coffee!

Yep we're going through that now. Runny nose teething etc etc. so we'll be back to square one again aswell.

At least I know it's not only my lad that's like this. Small consolation I know.

Suucee

so i resorted to stopping the dream feed at 10/11pm he has a huge appetite so i dont think he needs it. stopped friday.
night 1 woke 12.58 whinged on and off until 2.02 then slept untill 7.15. miracle
night 2. woke 3.30 but more than just whinging so went in to him which made him worse. eventually woke toddler. both back asleep by 4.40 . woke 8.00
night 3 woke 4.30 gave him soother 3 times . no idea what time he was back asleep by. woke 8.15
night 4 (last night) bed 7.15 up 6.30. first time ever he has slept that long. i actually cant believe it.

deh983

Wow suucee that's great!!! Hopefully you've cracked it now

I was only up twice last night so I can deal with that for now. Also he is miserable with cold/teething so have to allow for that aswell.

Back to work next week.

John Mason

asleep at 8pm, up at 1130pm until 230am:eek::eek:

back up at 530am :eek: for the day

exhausted doesnt even begin to describe it:mad:

Suucee

John Mason wrote: »

asleep at 8pm, up at 1130pm until 230am:eek::eek:

back up at 530am :eek: for the day

exhausted doesnt even begin to describe it:mad:

i feel bad for posting my success story. although i will probably be kicking myself tonight.
it so so hard.
do any of you have older kids too. i have a 2.5yr old and just find the days draining when we have had a bad night. she is very good at least but i feel bad for her some days when i havent an ounce of energy.

Claire de Lune

How is everyone?

I am on survival mode :-( Baby stays awake for 2 hours in the middle of the night, every night! There is absolutely nothing wrong with him, he's in great form, super happy all day, feeds well, sleeps well.... And then this :-(

Last night we just couldn't put him back to sleep, so we decided to give him a cuddle and told him "sleep time" and and let him cry... He cried for 3 minutes and went to sleep. But then he woke up 10 minutes later! So we did the same, a cuddle, "sleep time" and left. He cried for 2-3 min and went to sleep. And woke up again 15 min later! So we repeated the above. He went asleep for the rest of the night after the 5th time. I am trying to convince myself that this is progress!

deh983

Believe me that IS progress!!! We went through the same last week with the frequent waking. We are lucky in the sense that when he wakes during the night he doesn't stay awake for hours. But we had to start letting him cry as it was getting ridiculous the amount of times he was waking!!
Last night was the best ever. Asleep at 8:15 settled him at 10. Settled himself at 12 and that was it until 6!!! Into bed with me then till 7:30. Every night is different but since I started to try get him to settle himself it has improved a lot.

We are going into another leap in the next few days so probably all go out the window!!

Sssshhhh don't tell anyone but part of me is looking forward to going back to work!!!

Suucee

so i had 2 good nights (7pm - 6.30 am), then 2 bad nights awake for over an hour in the middle of the night) then last night was once again a good night.
fingers crossed. were at the start of a leap too so god knows what he is going to be like. but hey he never slept great when he wasnt in a leap anyway.

John Mason

i am like a zombie. he has been up twice in the last hour screaming the house down,

its going to be along day

Suucee

Hilarious. we had a party to go to last night so OH's brother and partner said they would take the kids.
There in the mid 20's, she's mad for kids but OH brother not ready yet. we arrived today to collect them and walked in to a bomb site. kids stuff everywhere, baba soaking wet having spilt beaker all over him self SIL looking exhausted and extreamly frazled and 2.5 was grand. was so funny. she couldnt get us out of there quick enough. L settled to bed fine for them. they had 2.5yr old in a seperate room and L in their room in travel cot, the other spare room was a big packed of stuff. they woke him at 11 pm when they were going to bed and couldnt get him back asleep for 3 hours. then he woke at 6.30. they were exhausted. was quite funny.
Major eye opener for them. hopefully he is ok tonight. friday night he slept from 7.15pm to 7.45 am. i was totally shocked so hopefully last night was just a little hicup.