Alcoholism, Depression and all the rest..

disengage

A strong urge came over me to post this so I will and see where it goes.

I'm 28, male, employed in a dead end job where I travel from close to the border to South County Dublin every day. Thats a hassle but it's short term in theory. The 5 years previously I lived in Dublin.

I have an appointment to see a GP tomorrow. Not my GP as I technically don't have one. It's been 6 or 7 years since I've seen a doctor. Considering how I've been living its surprising that I haven't needed to for physical health problems but I suppose I've been lucky with what. That's not to say I shouldn't have..

My family is littered with alcoholism, addiction and mental health problems, mainly on my dad's side but my mothers are not perfect either. Since I turned 18 I have almost drank myself to death. My mother thinks I've inherited my dad's family genes and I suppose it makes sense.

They are no longer together and he's basically a dead beat piss head who I have very little respect for. Not in a way that bothers me, just a pretty empty feeling.

I think I'm one of those people that was drawn to drink. I was very shy when I was younger which I really detested. At first it made me happy and confident. It was an escape and I was a 'happy drunk'. It then became just an escapism. Drinking makes you sad and sadness makes you drink. The old vicious cycle.

Early on I was drinking 6/7 days a week and that just became my life. Sure enough I made a complete d*ck of myself on countless occasions due to my excessive drinking and that just made it worse.

I gained a lot of weight (5 stone or so) and whatever self esteem or confidence I had was pretty much gone. I didn't show this to people and tried to deny it and hide and act like it wasn't but people eventually see through that and see your true colours. Especially when alcohol is involved at every turn.

Fast forward to now and it's almost impossible to get through a day without alcohol as a crutch. It no longer makes me happy 95% of time it just makes me less 'sad' and a lot more angry.

While I consider myself a good communicator I am truly awful at talking about myself. I think I just had to write this as a way of coping with what tomorrow's appointment.

Just feels like I've hit a dead end and there's no way back. Not sure what I hope to gain by this, maybe some reassurance from somebody who's been there and got through it.

I'm obviously terrified for my physical health as well as mental but one thing at a time.

I'm currently arriving at work with tears streaming down my face. Time to face the world.

Thanks for reading and I'm grateful for any responses.

ColeTrain

Talk to your doctor and he/she will help you with the best course of action.

At 28, you're nipping this in the bud early. Take each day as it comes from here on in. Every change you make now will benefit yourself in the future, there's certainly plenty of light in the tunnel.

Also, fair play to you for admitting that you've got a problem and that you need to sort it out. Speaking from experience, a lot of alcoholics will never take that step.

disengage

Thank you for replying. The encouragement really means a lot to me.

I've been admitting I've had a problem for years, maybe 5 at this stage. I just haven't done anything about it.

I'm some ways I was happy just trudging along being a functioning alcoholic.

I have tried exercise and got myself pretty fit in the past year. Lost about 3 stone through diet and gym/running. About 2.5 to go but I hoped I'd have lost the lot by Christmas. Pretty disappointed with that.

While I do enjoy it and it helps, it just didn't take away the unbearable sadness that comes over me when I leave work each evening.

I know this wasn't really a reply to your comment. Just trying to work it all out in my head before tomorrow.

Thanks again for posting.

spurshero

I gave up the drink 10 years ago and I'm 37 now so similar to yourself . Best decision I ever made . I was drinking 7 days a week . I won't lie . The first few months were tough . But now I woukdnt drink if I got it for nothing cause I realise how much better off I am without it. I since got married and started a family and am so much happier . I think you will be a lot happier too if ya give up the drink . It also sounds like u suffer depression . The doctor should be able to help u with that . Keep up the excercize . It will help make your body fitter and your mind clearer . To lose 3 stone is great going . Don't be worried bout going to doctor they have heard your type of story lots of times and will do their best to help . Best of luck

disengage

Thanks spurshero. Great to hear from someone who has been in a similar situation and I'm happy to hear things are going well for you.

Just dreading visiting a doctor. As I said I have tried to hide and ran away from my problems for so long that it just feels humiliating having to go to someone confess your unhappiness.

I know this is illogical and really backwards thinking. Just feels like some kind of defeat. Stupid I know.

I'm constantly about 10 secs away from bursting into tears so something has to be done.

Take care.

ChillyAngel

I could have written a lot of your post nearly word for word. I too have an appointment tomorrow to see my GP, except I can't afford to get there now as I spent what money I had left on a heap of drink.

I'm a few years older and a number of things have happened over the last few years to make me use alcohol as a crutch.

I never liked alcohol when I was younger and I drank it only because I was shy. I still love the confidence it gives me, but its gone far beyond that now.

I've lost my job recently mainly due to not being able to function at all after major sessions. I've told a good friend last night, however I was such a pest to him at times I think I'd already pissed him off too much to listen to my "intentions" anymore. I can't tell anyone else and I don't live near family or really any close friends that would understand. Any friends I do have are really only interested in drinking and partying.

I've looked up that AA set up and it's really not my thing. So when I can I will go to the GP, but until then I am just trying cold turkey.

I've alcohol in the house and I want to pour it down the sink, but can't "just in case".

I am exhausted, terrified, ashamed and upset.

GerB40

I'm 28 and my story isn't too different from yours. I could give you some advice I've picked up in my 7 months of sobriety but, relatively, I'm only a beginner at this stage. If you went over to the non drinkers forum and shared your story I'm certain you'll get great advice. I can honestly say that I've had life changing conversations over there, all for the better. I wouldn't be sober now we're it not for the folks over there. I hope this helps in some way..

@ ChilliAngel, I'd say the same to you. When you feel like you've had enough you'll know. Sobriety will not be easy at first but it really is worth it. You'll both get sick to the teeth of hearing people say "it'll be worth it" but believe me, it is..

Spencer Winterbotham

I was in the same boat as yourself at your age.

I went into rehab at 29 and quit the booze for 6 months. Then went back drinking for a few years. And quit again 18 months ago and haven't drunk since.

Its the hardest thing Ive ever done. Really really tough. Especially at the start.

But Jesus its worth it. Its a different life.

You have to want it though. I was banging on to anyone who would listen (after a few) from about the age of 25 that I was a dipso and that I was going to give up. I finally gave up when I was 32. So thats a lot of talking sh$t for many years before I did anything.

I wouldn't be the biggest fan of AA but you will find people in the exact same situation as yourself and there is a lot to be said for that kind of support.

You will need support. The reason I kept falling off the wagon was because I kept trying to quit on my own. Didn't work.

The benefits have been amazing. Lost a load of weight, got fighting fit, career sky rocketed, romance etc....

But the best part is I am never..... ever hung over. You wouldn't believe the difference alone that makes to the quality of your life.

PM me if you want some more advice.

ChillyAngel

I am the same. Banging out about how I need to stop, then not doing it. I have to, there's no doubt about it.

I spent time with my family last week on a short holiday and as the plane took off to come home I cried out the window so nobody would see me, because I wanted the pain to go away and I knew there was a certain way of making that happen, but I love them too much to cause them that kind of pain. So instead I got $hitfaced and left to go to my own house to allow that to happen.

disengage

Thanks for all the messages and kind offer. I think it's against the rules but I might take you up on that.

I chatted to someone today who was in similar circumstances. That's the first time ever.

Didn't realise how much chatting could help. A problem shared is a problem halved and all that.


I will report back on my gp visit for anybody interested. Worried but it has to be done.

disengage

Thanks for all the messages and kind offer. I think it's against the rules but I might take you up on that.

I chatted to someone today who was in similar circumstances. That's the first time ever.

Didn't realise how much chatting could help. A problem shared is a problem halved and all that.


I will report back on my gp visit for anybody interested. Worried but it has to be done.

Mesrine65

An alternative to AA without the emphasis on the 12 step program, that doesn't rely on a “higher power” or similar concepts...

http://lifering.org/

Best of luck OP

cynicalcough

I was where you are about 7 months ago. I got help (and am still getting) from a treatment centre and I stopped.

It wasn't easy at the start, its a scary place to be but my life is so much better is every possible way and yours can be too.

You can get through this and turn it around but you need to get support.

I wish you all the best and you can definitely turn this around, have hope.

disengage

Thanks so much. Appointment is in 90 mins..

This thread really opened my eyes in ways I never expected. It's like my outlook is so much brighter.. hard to explain.

I will take a look at the non-drinkers forum.


Hope today goes well!

Mark.

disengage

Hi all,

So I've taken the first step. The doctor was very nice which made a big difference.

I have to go for blood tests and see her again in a week. The test results have me pretty spooked but worrying about isn't going to change anything. I just have to get on with it.

She also gave me the number for a counsellor who I have to make an appointment with. I always said that talking wouldn't help me but I'm really not sure now. Posting here and chatting to people who understand certainly felt like a relief and a weight off my shoulders.

I will make an appointment and see how it goes.

Obviously she was reluctant to prescribe me anything before receiving the results of the blood tests.

If anybody is reading this and finds themselves in a similar situation I would definitely recommend seeing a GP. It's literally taken me years to get to this point but it feels like a burden has been lifted from me. Some of the darkness too.

If anybody is reading this and wants to chat or ask me anything feel free to PM me.

I am open to leaving this open and updating on my journey.

I'm not sure if that's allowed by Boards.ie

Thanks again and good luck.

goose2005

Most AA meetings have very little religious/spiritual focus, and there are LifeRing meetings in Navan and Belfast if that's near to you. http://www.dublinlifering.com/p/lifering-meetings-in-ireland.html

Spencer Winterbotham

goose2005 wrote: »

Most AA meetings have very little religious/spiritual focus, and there are LifeRing meetings in Navan and Belfast if that's near to you.

Have you been to any AA meetings?

I'm not a big fan of AA at all but when I did go there was no focus on religion, a little on spirituality but mostly just people talking about there lives without gargle.

Mayboy

Hi Mark,

I gave up drinking because my life was out of control at the time. It took a long time to get to a healthy place but now I have an odd drink and enjoy it. I just want to wish you the best. You have made great steps and its important that you realise you are the person who decides how you deal with the difficulties of life. You mention your family history etc - while this may pre-dispose you to some extent to alcoholism it may also be that your use of alcohol is a coping strategy to deal with the difficulty of how you feel. So, I really think you are grerat, I would take it one day at a time and see short steps as the way forward - there will be blips, upsets and falls along the way - these are part of it too. Go for it - we're all rooting for you. :-)

disengage

Thanks Mayboy.

Everything seems a bit all over the place today. Nothing has really changed it just seems like such a strange road ahead. Life will be so different, hopefully in a good way given time.

I travel about 20 hours a week to and from work. I'd normally be drunk by the time I get home at night. Need to find some new hobbies and things to occupy my mind. I associate everything with drink which doesn't help but will put the work in and try to change that.

Hope that wasn't too downbeat.

Thanks for the encouragement.

miamee

Not downbeat, just matter-of-fact. That is a lot of time to fill when commuting but if you plan ahead hopefully you can find lots to interest you. Maybe start with books, audiobooks, downloading movies, listening to podcasts.

I have no advice to offer on the rest of it except to say that I admire you taking these steps to look after yourself and wish you the very best

disengage

Thanks Miamee.

Have quite an active interest in all of the above. I think the underlying depression is making things seem pretty uninteresting at the moment but I hope I can work on that. I'm fine in the mornings it just the evening time that I start to struggle.

Does anybody have experience of taking anti depressants when dealing with the aftermaths of alcoholism. It's probably premature but I really think I need something to lift my mood. No idea how effective they are and of course that varies..

Hope that's not considered medical advice. Just looking for experiences.

Thanks.

the evasion_kid

disengage wrote: »

Thanks Miamee.

Have quite an active interest in all of the above. I think the underlying depression is making things seem pretty uninteresting at the moment but I hope I can work on that. I'm fine in the mornings it just the evening time that I start to struggle.

Does anybody have experience of taking anti depressants when dealing with the aftermaths of alcoholism. It's probably premature but I really think I need something to lift my mood. No idea how effective they are and of course that varies..

Hope that's not considered medical advice. Just looking for experiences.

Thanks.

Doctors won't normally prescribe anti depressants until you get the blood test back,I've battled with the bottle a few times and usually my gp will prescribe librium,for dt's.I know how you feel about being a bit afraid of the blood test I used to go on benders and when I came off it would go get a blood test to see what damage I might have done,just try put it to the back of your mind and you'll have the results in no time.it will take time for your body to recover but the benefits of not drinking are second to none you'll feel like a new person.take up new hobbies to fill your time reading,fitness,fishing whatever takes your interest!

Good luck with it op,drink really is a b*stard for some people.

I'd second posting in the non-drinkers forum here,its helped me immensely on my path to giving it up.

disengage

the evasion_kid wrote: »

Doctors won't normally prescribe anti depressants until you get the blood test back,I've battled with the bottle a few times and usually my gp will prescribe librium,for dt's.I know how you feel about being a bit afraid of the blood test I used to go on benders and when I came off it would go get a blood test to see what damage I might have done,just try put it to the back of your mind and you'll have the results in no time.it will take time for your body to recover but the benefits of not drinking are second to none you'll feel like a new person.take up new hobbies to fill your time reading,fitness,fishing whatever takes your interest!

Good luck with it op,drink really is a b*stard for some people.

I'd second posting in the non-drinkers forum here,its helped me immensely on my path to giving it up.

Thanks for the kind words. I'm pretty sure the doctor will prescribe AD's when results are back. She pretty much said so.

I have gone weeks-months not drinking over the years but my mood didn't lift in any life changing way. I drank in attempt to mask my depression which of course was fuel to the fire.

Perhaps I have unreasonable expectations but I am pinning my hopes on something to lift my mood.

I tried the non drinkers group but tbh I don't see many posts I can relate to. Seems to be a lot of people who weren't suited to drink, didn't like hangovers rather than people who had problems with alcoholism.

Sorry if that sounds ignorant or rude.

It also seems very quiet. Maybe it's the time of year.

Mark.

the evasion_kid

disengage wrote: »

Thanks for the kind words. I'm pretty sure the doctor will prescribe AD's when results are back. She pretty much said so.

I have gone weeks-months not drinking over the years but my mood didn't lift in any life changing way. I drank to try and mask my depression which of course was fuel to the fire.

Perhaps I have unreasonable expectations but I am pinning my hopes on something to lift my mood.

Mark.

Don't get me wrong life is no walk in the park op the only thing will be that your facing it with a clear head,things will improve gradually you'll find happiness in the small things in life and be able to remember them.as a side note if you do stay off it for any length of time don't listen to that voice that tells you it will be OK to drink again,once the body and mind turn alcoholic there's really no turning back.

Rubberchikken

You've made the decision to speak to a gp. Thats a great first step.
Good luck

John_Rambo

disengage wrote: »

I have tried exercise and got myself pretty fit in the past year. Lost about 3 stone through diet and gym/running. About 2.5 to go

I read your post yesterday, but didn't have time to post. This part stood out for me. Three stone?!?! You're obviously stronger and have more determination than you tell yourself, what you have done here is more than millions can do in this country alone, and they try hard. You must have trained hard, worked hard... you deserve major credit for this, strong mind, strong body. Well done. Try morning work outs, hit the gym with vengeance. Try sunset runs, that keeps you off the booze the night before. Well done Mark. Sincerely well done.

You have me back working out, thanks.

disengage

Hi JR,

I set myself a goal to lose 5 stone this year and if I'm honest I'm very upset I didn't do that. I had 12 months but sadly I just constantly get pulled back to drink..

I could barely climb a few flights of stairs 18 months ago. I ran 8k a couple of months ago.

As mentioned earlier as much as I like it, it just doesn't take away the sadness.

Since I left Dublin it's become harder to keep a regular routine.

Hope to get back to it on Sunday.

Thank you

cynicalcough

Giving up drinking is a great kickstart to weight loss. Ive lost 3 and a half stone since I stopped.

Re the anti-depressants you may need to look at that and you may find that your mood improved after a while anyway. Remember alcohol is a depressant and you've been pouring a lot of depressants into your system for a while now. Once your body starts to repair you may find your mood gets a lot better on its own.

Keep at it - you've made great progress

disengage

Thanks cynical. I suppose I'll just have to wait and see.

These forums clearly indicate that there are people in much worse situations than I. There's a lot to be positive about.


Mark.

mikemac1

I see a lot of myself in your own post, drinking 6/7 days a week and constantly being close to tears.

Well done on the decision to see a GP. I did that too and my GP was fantastic and had a great chat with me and followed up to see how I was getting on.

What you're describing is quite common and a good GP should be able to help you along. Maybe they won't prescribe anti depressants in the first meeting, they will want you to try diet and exercise first. Well that's my experience anyway

Like you I read non drinkers forum on boards and also read about AA. Not something I wanted to engage in and while AA works for many you can go without it for sure

disengage wrote: »

I set myself a goal to lose 5 stone this year and if I'm honest I'm very upset I didn't do that. I had 12 months but sadly I just constantly get pulled back to drink..

You lost 3 stone so over half way there. That's a briiliant achievement! That's better then most people you know could achieve, fair play. No reason to be so hard on yourself here

disengage

mikemac1 wrote: »

I see a lot of myself in your own post, drinking 6/7 days a week and constantly being close to tears.

Well done on the decision to see a GP. I did that too and my GP was fantastic and had a great chat with me and followed up to see how I was getting on.

What you're describing is quite common and a good GP should be able to help you along. Maybe they won't prescribe anti depressants in the first meeting, they will want you to try diet and exercise first. Well that's my experience anyway

Like you I read non drinkers forum on boards and also read about AA. Not something I wanted to engage in and while AA works for many you can go without it for sure



You lost 3 stone so over half way there. That's a briiliant achievement! That's better then most people you know could achieve, fair play. No reason to be so hard on yourself here

I am definitely not doing AA. It's just something that will never appeal to me.

I will see the counsellor on Thursday to appease the GP and to see how it goes.. It might do something miraculous for me, who knows.

I am aware of all my issues. I read and think a lot about it. Not sure that's always wise.

I don't really have many what I'd consider underlying problems apart from the inherent sadness. it has always bothered me that I was unhappy for no apparent reason. It's a family trait. Drinking obviously escalated the problem. Or maybe I'm wrong..

A week today since I drank. Gonna go for a run in beautiful and sunny Carlingford. Worse places you could be.

My first full day off. Hopefully it goes to plan.


I posted a thread on the non drinkers forum.

disengage

I deleted the last post because it was a bit cringey, even by my standards. ;-)

Had blood tests today. Doctor will text me if there's any major problem, so no news is good news for the moment. Fingers crossed.

Onto day 10. So far so good. Can't say my mood is one of joy but it's not too bad either. Enjoying running again - kinda wish I could do it for hours though!

Waiting on the counsellor to get back to me about an appointment. He was in higher demand than I expected. I'm easy either way.

Need new activities. Might go to Belfast and do some Christmas shopping on Sunday. Wouldn't be uncommon for me except I would normally have a few accompanying drinks to pass the day..

Maybe it's not so wise after all. Or maybe I just need to decide not to drink and stick to it!

Kinda dreading Christmas now. Will have to find something to keep me busy.

GerB40

disengage wrote: »

I deleted the last post because it was a bit cringey, even by my standards. ;-)

Had blood tests today. Doctor will text me if there's any major problem, so no news is good news for the moment. Fingers crossed.

Onto day 10. So far so good. Can't say my mood is one of joy but it's not too bad either. Enjoying running again - kinda wish I could do it for hours though!

Waiting on the counsellor to get back to me about an appointment. He was in higher demand than I expected. I'm easy either way.

Need new activities. Might go to Belfast and do some Christmas shopping on Sunday. Wouldn't be uncommon for me except I would normally have a few accompanying drinks to pass the day..

Maybe it's not so wise after all. Or maybe I just need to decide not to drink and stick to it!

Kinda dreading Christmas now. Will have to find something to keep me busy.

That was me every Christmas. I'd need at least 8 pints before I'd do my shopping and when the anxiety disorder started to sober me up I'd have all the "essentials" bought before I went straight back to the pub. It's a sad existence but it was all I knew. 7 months sober now and there's still an element of dread, probably because it's what I relate to the xmas shop, but I'm looking forward to any bit of normality I find during this mad season...

Edit: Oh and best wishes disengage (and of course everyone else on this forum). When I saw your post on "Personal Issues" I knew, or rather hoped, that that the "non drinkers" forum would help you. I suppose time will tell but by reading your comments you seem fairly upbeat and more importantly, knowledgeable about what has to be done. I could give you countless tips I've picked up here but I won't. I think your smart enough to know what has to be done.

So happy xmas disengage (that's sarcasm by the way, these next few weeks are huge tests for both of us and personally I doubt I'll be truly happy until January, assuming I haven't drank) but if we can stay on the wagon imagine how great we'll feel in Jan having had a dry xmas. It'll be a huge achievement.

Lastly, if you feel really bad and drink seems like the only answer come straight back to this thread and share. There are folks here who are fonts of knowledge and will be delighted to help another who is going through what they have been through. You'll be welcomed with open arms... Keep fighting bud

HelgaWard

Hi,
Just wanted to suggest you consider coming along to the North East Runners, based in Dundalk. There is a facebook page North East Runners Dundalk where they post times of training, upcoming races etc. I joined the club over a year ago as a blow in to Dundalk and it has been a fantastic way to get to know people of all ages. Also I know of some members of the club who are further along a similar path to your own, no longer drink and are doing fantastic. There are runners of every ability, and there will be lots of new members in January, I'd really recommend giving it a go,
Best of luck.

Rubberchikken

As you're enjoying the running, try to stick with it, it'll get easier and you'll get better and faster.

You're doing the right things at the moment so stick with them.

Good luck

disengage

Thanks for all the messages of support, Ger. One big difference this year is I have gone shopping already. I would normally go on the 22nd or 23rd fuelled by dread and drink. Great to hear positive outcomes from people who have been down the same road. It has meant a lot to me.

Helga - I've been thinking of joining a running group of some sort. I generally commute to Newry but can easily switch to Dundalk. I'll take a look at the Facebook page. I can do a 5k comfortably so hopefully I'm not totally out of my depth! I suspect I'll still be living in Louth after Christmas so could be ideal.

Thanks for the suggestion and if you don't mind I'll pm closer to the time if I'm attending?

GerB40

disengage wrote: »

Thanks for all the messages of support, Ger. One big difference this year is I have gone shopping already. I would normally go on the 22nd or 23rd fuelled by dread and drink. Great to hear positive outcomes from people who have been down the same road. It has meant a lot to me.

Helga - I've been thinking of joining a running group of some sort. I generally commute to Newry but can easily switch to Dundalk. I'll take a look at the Facebook page. I can do a 5k comfortably so hopefully I'm not totally out of my depth! I suspect I'll still be living in Louth after Christmas so could be ideal.

Thanks for the suggestion and if you don't mind I'll pm closer to the time if I'm attending?

I just edited my comment above because I feel the similarities between us are uncanny.. I hope it helps.

HelgaWard

disengage wrote: »

Thanks for all the messages of support, Ger. One big difference this year is I have gone shopping already. I would normally go on the 22nd or 23rd fuelled by dread and drink. Great to hear positive outcomes from people who have been down the same road. It has meant a lot to me.

Helga - I've been thinking of joining a running group of some sort. I generally commute to Newry but can easily switch to Dundalk. I'll take a look at the Facebook page. I can do a 5k comfortably so hopefully I'm not totally out of my depth! I suspect I'll still be living in Louth after Christmas so could be ideal.

Thanks for the suggestion and if you don't mind I'll pm closer to the time if I'm attending?

Absolutely, no problem at all.

mct1

I posted this for disengage on the non-drinkers forum but maybe I can repost it here in case it helps anyone else trying to stay sober.

"It's hard to do this alone, so you might like to check out the forum at www.brighteyecounselling.co.uk. Post on the New Members thread and maybe join the sobriety challenges. It's a safe and supportive place and you'll find lots of others doing the same as you."

Good luck all.

disengage

Thanks mct1.

Exactly what I have been looking for. I came across a couple of US based sites but they were a bit too spiritual and American for my tastes.

I've registered as disengage.

disengage

OP anseo,

Just thought I'd give an update on my situation since people here were kind enough to be helpful. I have been to see the counsellor which was more beneficial which than I expected. I have a second appointment in a couple of weeks.


Also, my blood tests returned pretty much clear which I'm still shocked by. Definitely feels like I've been given a second chance. I fell off the wagon pretty spectacularly over Christmas but haven't drank in 6 days.

Doctor has prescribed Lexapro and Xanax so giving that a bash.


Just have to deal with the January blues.


Mark

auldgranny

disengage wrote: »

OP anseo,

Just thought I'd give an update on my situation since people here were kind enough to be helpful. I have been to see the counsellor which was more beneficial which than I expected. I have a second appointment in a couple of weeks.


Also, my blood tests returned pretty much clear which I'm still shocked by. Definitely feels like I've been given a second chance. I fell off the wagon pretty spectacularly over Christmas but haven't drank in 6 days.

Doctor has prescribed Lexapro and Xanax so giving that a bash.


Just have to deal with the January blues.


Mark

Well done Mark. Did not read your thread till today and I admire your honesty and determination. You are lucky that there was no damage to your liver but don't be complacent about that. It is a second chance but grab it. Day 4 for me today. Best of luck and I will keep an eye out for you.