Confused

LegacyUser

Met my (ex) girlfriend two years ago. We really clicked. But from early on we began to fight a lot. Only over small things but they would blow out of all proportion, at the end of a particular row it would be about what was said during the row and not the issue itself.
We split up last October2013 for a few weeks but got back together and things were great for a while but they eventually fell back into the same routine and we were fighting like cats and dogs.
We split up again in April, this time for about three months. We started seeing each other again and things were good but as she is in her mid thirties she is beginning to panic a bit about having kids.
Now I'm all for having kids but I wanted to concentrate on us and sort things out properly with us before we decided to bring a kid into all this.She started questioning my commitment to her..
Que the rows again and everything went to ****. We've now split up ,again, and this time I feel it is really it. Before, a part of me always felt we'd get back together. My friends and family think I'm mad to be thinking about being with after all the sh$t that has gone on between us. The thing is I love her and I don't know what to do....

Neyite

Whether its that you both have an unhealthy way of conflict resolution or that you simply are too different, the fact is that you both were fighting from pretty much the start of seeing each other, over stupid stuff, and have split three times in two years.

And the only reason you both can think of to get back is because of her body clock?? Don't bring a baby into that mess. He or she does not deserve that kind of chaotic existence. Pregnancy and parenting is pretty tough and you need to be a solid couple to have your relationship survive it. I cant see that yours would make it.

The first two years of a relationship should be the honeymoon stage. You both should have been all loved up, not at each other's throats. You might love each other, but it doesnt sound like you like each other very much.

Dixie Chick

You are right to want to sort things out, or have a stable relationship for even thinking about bringing a child into the world.

Arguing is healthy, but too much arguing is not good. I find that there are some relationships are like that, and the chemistry is coming from the fighting, to the making up, breaking up and then a fab reunion...its all super highs but super lows as well, that cannot be good for the nerves really.

strobe

It'd be stark raving lunacy to bring a child into a relationship like this (and no offense to either of you, but also unbelievably selfish). You think you fight a lot now? Honestly do you think you'll fight LESS, rather than more when there is a kid in the picture needing constant care and attention and sacrifice, with the added financial and time and energy demands, roaring it's eyes out in the other room cause Mammy and Daddy are fighting again?

OK, you love her, tough to walk away from, I get it. But you'll miss her for a few weeks or months, mope around a bit, then meet someone else fall in love with her and thank your lucky stars you walked when you did.

(Also, don't head back for one last sexual goodbye here. Babies have an uncanny ability for being accidentally conceived in these circumstances. )

CaraMay

Op sorry but you are not compatible and the most likely reason she is putting up with that fact is that she wants kids right now!! As soon as she gets what she wants you'll be gone!! Walk away and meet someone who wants more than babies from you.