Nothing brings old things back to life like Polish

RobYourBuilder

A Polish doctor says she has been in “deep shock” since learning that a 91-year-old woman she pronounced dead woke up in a morgue.

The doctor said on TVN24 television on Friday that she was sure the patient was dead after finding “no basic life functions” during a house call on 6 November.

Prosecutors are investigating whether the patient’s life and health were endangered by the inaccurate death diagnosis.

Identified by the media as Janina Kolkiewicz, the elderly woman was examined in the eastern town of Ostrów Lubelski after relatives noticed she was not breathing. She was pronounced dead and sent to the morgue.

Hours later an undertaker noticed she was moving. An official says Kolkiewicz is now in good health.

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/nov/14/polish-dead-woman-wakes-up

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-30048087

Yeah, but not as shocked as the people she may have declared dead who didn't wake up in time! In Poland, there are no coroners. Death is pronounced by regular doctors. Busy doctors prioritise dealing with patients that are alive over people who are dead and can wait. It's not the first time this has happened.

Mercifully, the woman, a Ms Kolkiewicz, suffers from dementia so didn't fully realise what happened. She complained of being cold so went home to warm up with soup and pancakes.

I can't think of anything worse than waking up in a casket six feet deep. I want to buried with a fully charged Nokia 3310. The battery on them bad boys lasts for weeks.

Quazzie

All people declared dead should have a spike put through their brain to be sure.


This will also help in the inevitable zombie apocalypse.

Grayson

RobYourBuilder wrote: »

In Poland, there are no coroners. Death is pronounced by regular doctors

People here are declared dead by normal doctors. It happens in every single hospital and nursing home etc.

You see it on TV when someone looks at their watch and goes "Time of death 13:40"

BTW, coroners only get involved if the cause of death is unknown.

Banjo String

My two next door neighbours are Polish.

Mr Sheen and Mr Muscle.

mosstin

Coming over here taking our jobs and waking our dead.

Cantremember

I'm bitterly disappointed. I thought this thread was about geriatrics being brought back to vigour by nubile Eastern Europeans. *puts teeth back in.

meathstevie

Grayson wrote: »

People here are declared dead by normal doctors. It happens in every single hospital and nursing home etc.

You see it on TV when someone looks at their watch and goes "Time of death 13:40"

BTW, coroners only get involved if the cause of death is unknown.

Wrong there, Coroner will get involved in most if not all sudden deaths. What doesn't always happen is an inquest.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Yeah, one of the drs who looked after my dad came about 40 minutes after he died and pronounced him dead. I don't think there's any special death doctor on duty

Speedsie

meathstevie wrote: »

Wrong there, Coroner will get involved in most if not all sudden deaths. What doesn't always happen is an inquest.

Exactly, coroner involved in sudden deaths, this lady was 91, when my father died at 80 death was pronounced by a 'normal' doctor.

kneemos

Don't even need a doctor.I've seen nursing home workers declare someone dead.

CINCLANTFLT

Donatan & Cleo - My Słowianie - We Are Slavic (Po…: http://youtu.be/q8J3GAg5zaI

One minute thirty seconds in woke me up!

Dtp1979

Certainly brought my old shoes back to life

Grayson

meathstevie wrote: »

Wrong there, Coroner will get involved in most if not all sudden deaths. What doesn't always happen is an inquest.

What I said was that the coroner gets involved when they don't know what caused a death.
When my dad died 10 weeks after a stroke, the coroner checked him out. That was because he had a number of secondary issues that came after the stroke (MRSA etc). He had been in hospital for 10 weeks at that stage and was slowly slipping away. It was not a sudden death. But because they couldn't state exactly what had killed him they had to investigate and that's why the coroner got involved.

Most people who die from old age aren't sent to a coroner. That's because if you pass away in your sleep at 95 years of age, people kinda assume it was old age.

It has nothing to do with how quick a death is. It has to do with whether or not the cause is known.

Inquests are normally only held in the case of violent deaths or when the cause cannot be determined by the coroner.

Grayson

kneemos wrote: »

Don't even need a doctor.I've seen nursing home workers declare someone dead.

My mum worked as a nurse in one. When someone died they would call a doctor. It's because the death cert needs a doctor signature. So even if someone died in their sleep during the night and the body was cold, a doctor still had to turn up at some point.

Tail Docker

I thought this was gonna be about shining up the silverware.

Riddle101

Thought this thread was going to be about shoe polish being able to make old things look brand new or something.

Calibos

Riddle101 wrote: »

Thought this thread was going to be about shoe polish being able to make old things look brand new or something.

So did I. I was then going to post about Central European necromancers as a faux misinterpretation of the thread title. Turns out the thread actually really was about Central European necromancers!!

The OP double bluffed me!

Truckermal

Didn't father jack drink floor polish that bought about the symptoms of death..:D