Infatuated easily?

LegacyUser

I was hoping someone could advise me on how to stop obsessing over people and becoming infatuated so easily? I really hate it but it seems to happen everytime I like someone. I can't stop thinking about the person which leads me to basically stalk their social media accounts. I have a tendency to become jealous too, sometimes over completely trivial things which is stupid. It honestly makes no sense to me why I'm like this because I would hope I'm ordinary enough in every other respect. I would love to overcome this and calm down a little.

Any advice appreciated!

skallywag

I would not worry so much about the social media stalking, I would say that you are not alone by a long shot on that score. If an app ever becomes available which tells you who has viewed your FB page and when, then I can see the membership quickly taking a dramatic hit!

Mr. Loverman

What age are you?

This sort of thing is common when you're young, and calms down as you get older...

sashafierce

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skallywag

Find the same myself re FB, very easy to keep track of someone if they keep popping up on your feed regularly kind of like watching a soap. You can of course disable cetain people from appearing in your feed ...

LegacyUser

I'm 21! I rarely go on Facebook anymore because it of, but I have moved over to Twitter and Instagram which are just as bad. I will block the person and be fine for a day or two but then I get an overwhelming urge to check if they've updated their account. Sometimes if the person I like is talking to someone I don't know, I'll check their account too. That means I'm checking in on some random person who I have never met. I just find it weird and creepy.

It's probably just down to having too much time on my hands, I don't have many classes this semester, so that's probably it.

Lalealea

skallywag wrote: »

Find the same myself re FB, very easy to keep track of someone if they keep popping up on your feed regularly kind of like watching a soap. You can of course disable cetain people from appearing in your feed ...

The trouble is creepers often forget the person is an actual living person who has feelings and is real. They are not a character in a book or a film. And that drama is their life not a soap.

So long as you are not frightening this person or creeping them out or anything or letting it damage you. I guess don't worry.

It's not something that applies to me. I think I know people more by feels than by collecting info.

I have been thinking of deleting my FB actually.

Rubberchikken

If you have too much time on your hands as you said, then maybe getting involved in something would help.

Are you into sport? If not figure out whatever it is you are interested in and get busy with that.
It'll take you mind off of FB etc.
good luck

Lalealea

sashafierce wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

I think creeping on people you dislike is a bit over the line. It's like going with malevolent intent.

I think it's wrong to go with the idea of harvesting info or anything. It happens sure. But you have to be careful even the harmless best intentions could be misinterpreted. And it happens.

themissymoo

Don't worry about the social media end of it. I did this when I was younger too. It's just natural curiosity. I went onto my crushes Twitter and found out he had a girlfriend, so I of course ended up have a look through her account too!

I do think it may be linked to a self-esteem issue at times though. If you find yourself comparing yourself to the person they were talking to or whatever, then that's an issue (something I did a few times when on my crushes social media accounts).

With the infatuation, I'm guessing you'll grow out of it. I stopped being infatuated with people when I was 18 (I'm 20 now). However, as I said I had some issues that I needed to work through - another one was Daddy issues, which made me become more attached and infatuated with men than I am now that I've worked through them. Did you have any experiences with a parent or family member perhaps that could have resulted in you becoming infatuated with people a little?

Lalealea

We all get crushes that we fawn over.Happens to me too. One sided expectations can hurt.

I wouldn't worry too much.