Incompetent at work

LegacyUser

Hi. I hope you can help me with a problem I have. I am in a job at the moment but I feel I'm not qualified for it. I think my qualifications looked better on paper than they do in real life. I didn't lie on my job application, but embelished a little, as we all tend to do.

But now I feel I am totally out of my depth. I am always asking people for help, forgetting things and making mistakes. It's not that I'm not trying, I just don't think I'm smart enough or have enough experience. I genuinely feel incompetent and stupid.

I don't want to end up making a mistake that could cost my employer money, or perhaps lose my job. I am constantly stressed about this. Everytime I do tasks in work, I analyse it over and over to make sure it is right. Or if I don't know how to do it, I waste hours trying to learn something I should probably already know. I spend too much time on this, and usually end up getting it wrong.

I am also responsible for projects, which I don't like. I'm not the kind of person that can take charge and deliver. I feel like a fraud, but I don't know what to do. I thought about quiting, but I have nowhere else to go. Other jobs will have very similar responsibilities. I considered changing career, but I am only qualified in this one field and I can't see how I can apply it elsewhere.

I hoped it would get better over time, but it hasn't. I dread going in to work and it's really getting me down. I know it's not healthy to think this way but sometimes I hope that I get ill or get in an accident so that I can avoid the problems I have at work.

Is there any way out of this rut that I am not seeing?

maroon

If you've got the job means you are somewhat qualified, even you admit you are. Just keep on performing and learning day to day, experience comes with time. You are not "stupid", don't underestimate your abilities to learn. Keep asking questions and take on board the answers. How long are you in the job? Has the employer or supervisor expressed any concerns?

Lux23

Have you gotten in trouble in work?

Buona Fortuna

Hi OP, I'm 57 so I've had a few jobs in the past;)

Let me tell you that every new job I've had, had quite a steep learning curve. I think in the first few weeks or months a lot of people have these negative thoughts (I'm no good - I never will be) and think about quitting - how long have you been in the job?

Back in the year oh dot we used to use filofaxes for stuff. Nowadays there's electronic equivalents or posh phones. I used to break everything down to milestones and tasks that I had to do. This helped me train my mind, so that I needed to make less and less notes. Also if your boss or customer asks you something, it looks a lot more professional to look in your book / phone for the answer than just looking into space and saying "Um".

Are there other people in the organisation doing a similar job? Could you befriend them, pick their brains, talk about their jobs ....

If not how about befriending other people in the chain? This is probably not the greatest example but suppose you are a construction project manager, then try befriending the site foreman see what his problems are, and pick his brains to solve the joint problem.

Didn't mean to write this much. I hope it helps you OP. Good Luck.

skallywag

OP how long have you worked on this job?

Rubberchikken

How long are you in this position?

If not long then you have to give yourself a fair chance to get the hang of things.

Is your manager/supervisor approachable? Maybe you could suggest further training to help you accomplish more.

You were the best they interviewed so go easy on yourself

sashafierce

This post has been deleted.

Starokan

I have had 7 jobs in total and in all cases it has taken me a long time to grow into the role, its just my nature, I almost have to become used to the place, the work itself, my colleagues , the clients before I feel comfortable. Usually this has taken a couple of months for the more harder roles. a lot would depend here on how long are you in the position.

I would suggest talking to a manager or HR, see what they think and then evaluate your position. There may be ways to bring about more job satisfaction or it could simply be a case of round peg square hole and this is not the role you should be in. No shame in that either, we all need to find our niche and there is no point in wasting time somewhere you are uncomfortable.

LegacyUser

Thanks all for the replies.

I have been in the job a little over 6 months. I haven't got in trouble yet, but I have noticed my managers sighing and looking disappointed in me.

I do want to learn and be better at my job, but I fear asking questions will make me look very stupid. Some things I don't know would be considered simple for the role I'm in, but I haven't done some of these things since college. If I have done something similar before, I'm not able to apply it to new problems. It's like I need to work off previous examples to be able to do my job and I can't find the resources to do that.

I also feel I don't have the time to learn on the job. I have a lot of deadlines and I keep missing them because I'm spending so much time trying to figure out the correct way to do things. Sure, I could ask my manager how to do it, but that would look very poor for me if he realises that I cannot perform simple tasks on my own.

If I try to reach out to colleagues, I would also look weak to them.

I feel like there's no winning in this situation without coming acroos as incompetent.

Buona Fortuna

concernedguest wrote: »

Thanks all for the replies.

I have been in the job a little over 6 months. I haven't got in trouble yet, but I have noticed my managers sighing and looking disappointed in me.

Its still not long and probably says more about him than you. Sighing is hardly professional.

I do want to learn and be better at my job, but I fear asking questions will make me look very stupid. Some things I don't know would be considered simple for the role I'm in, but I haven't done some of these things since college. If I have done something similar before, I'm not able to apply it to new problems. It's like I need to work off previous examples to be able to do my job and I can't find the resources to do that.

I also feel I don't have the time to learn on the job. I have a lot of deadlines and I keep missing them because I'm spending so much time trying to figure out the correct way to do things. Sure, I could ask my manager how to do it, but that would look very poor for me if he realises that I cannot perform simple tasks on my own.

Put yourself in the manager's position. What would you rather have:

• an employee who asks you questions, appears interested, makes you feel good about being able to give the answer. or
• an employee who doesn't ask, goes off, and does the job, badly, incorrectly or late?

If I try to reach out to colleagues, I would also look weak to them.

I feel like there's no winning in this situation without coming acroos as incompetent.

OK. How about making friends with them? Maybe they support the same team, went to the same college or where the same colour socks. We all have similarities with people, so we grab a coffee with them, share our lunch with them. During those times we talk about the thing we most have in common - the job. How's that new school going? How's this? Hows that?

Unless these individuals are totally shallow they won't just talk about their jobs. They'll talk about yours and they are bound to make suggestions.

Would you sooner "come across" as incompetent or have the point proved by having left or being fired?

micosoft

Ironically OP, the fact you think you are incompetent is actually a sign that you are competent. It's called the Dunning-Kruger effect. In effect, as you become more competent with your role, you feel less competent because you realise how much you don't know. Happens to most people with any complex role.

See following diagram - you're about half way across...