Could use some advice/perspective

Son_of_Belial

Hi Folks, I'll try to keep this as brief as possible. Back in February of this year my girlfriend and I broke up. There had been some problems in the relationship (mostly regarding me) and things had come to a head. There was no contact between us both after that and for about 10 weeks I didn't so much as kiss another girl. However, I still missed my gf very much but knew felt I needed to keep away. However, after the ten week mark I needed a distraction and wanted a replacement I suppose for the hole she'd left in my life so I went on a bit of a rampage. By the time (for various reasons) my girlfriend got back in touch I'd slept with 5 different girls (one encounter was a 3some), one girl I was "dating" for maybe 3 weeks, the others were girls who I slept with on two occasions each. First of all, I am not looking for the typical "High Five Dude" type of reaction - I'm giving details so you can get the gist. My gf had been in a relationship of sorts with one guy for about 3 months during our 5 month break up. For the sake of honesty, clarity and sexual health I suppose (even though I had always worn protection) I came clean to my gf about what I had been up to while we'd been apart. We got back together, her knowing the details and information etc., and me answering all her questions.

However...

She is finding it extremely difficult, more so of late, to "get over" the fact that I had been with 5 essentially random girls during our hiatus. One day she promises she'll try to get over it, another day she wants space, another day she wants to break up again, repeat. I try to be patient because I know she's hurting and try to talk through how she's feeling and tell her (which is true) how bad I feel that this hurts her so much. We both do love one another a great deal, and while I have got over the fact that she was with this guy for 3 months, she can't seem to get around my own exploits.

Has anyone else experienced this? Girls especially, what do you think of the situation? How can I help her to get over what happened and move on with our lives? She is very hurt and upset and feels that she may be a fool to stay with me and thinks I couldn't love her as much as I say/she thought if I could do that. However I honestly thought at the time that I'd never see her again and I suppose after that initial ten weeks I wanted to try and find that connection again that we had/have together. Needless to say I didn't... I mean I had to try and move on with my life. Any perspectives?

Mr. Loverman

She didn't have sex with the guy she dated for three months?

Of course she did.

In fact, I guarantee she had more sex than you (regular relationship) and I would bet money they weren't using condoms all the time.

So you had meaningless safe sex a few times, and she had relationship sex probably without condoms.

She not being very fair, is she?

CaraMay

I think it's 'worse' that she had a relationship as a relationship would lead you to think she had feelings for him.

I'm a bit of a prude and wouldn't like it either for a variety of reasons but she needs to make a decision and stick with it.

Son_of_Belial

Yeah I've tried to make those exact points but she still can't seem to let it go. I just don't know what else to say to her so I'm not making a doormat out of myself yet I can make her feel a bit better. Like she was never jealous before - now she is a bit...