I think I have a form of Asperger's

LegacyUser

Somebody in my family, a teenager, has been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. They had a lot of issues growing up, which were ignored, and it all came to a head recently, and the diagnosis was made.

I have had all the same issues. Not on a radical scale, but I can tick all the boxes. The difference is, I am 45! All my life I have been different, outside the group, distant, a loner, dysfunctional. I didn't recognise it for years, as I thought everyone else had the problem!

It took me until well into my 30s to face up to a myriad of issues that I began to realise were inside of me, rather than outside. One by one, I knocked a few neuroses on the head, and I feel I have made quite a good job of socialising myself, as well as overcoming a whole series of fears, phobias and obsessive behaviours.

The problem is a physical one, however. All those years of backward thinking left me stuck in a rut in my career, meaning that while I was quite clever, I never advanced in school, never made a success of anything, and was left behind socially, career-wise and money-wise. I have spent the last decade playing catch-up, but it's like being in a marathon, where everyone else is at the twenty mile mark, and I am only six miles in. I find that at 45, time is running out for me to get myself financially to where I should have been had I planned my life properly, and I am struggling badly working just to stay above the breadline, with nothing left to put away for the future. My job is a dead end job with no prospects, and I haven't the training or experience to get a job that does have prospects.

I have realised a lot about life, and I have learned a lot. This world doesn't leave much room for someone who fell off the roundabout to climb back on again, though. I suppose that is still a little of the backward thinking that my brain is hard-wired for, no matter how much I try to overcome it.

I feel like the roundabout is spinning too fast for me to get fully aboard. Does anyone else here have experience of starting from scratch at such a late stage?

Rubberchikken

You need to talk to your gp to grt a proper diagnosis.
After that you can start to decide where you want life to take you next.
45 is still young enough to start over.

Good luck

lady of the flowers

First- (and this may not make you feel better) but you are certainly not alone in being behind life's "goals" in fact it seems to me that you are nearer than a lot of people in that you are now motivated and have come along way. Your GP may not be the best person to get a diagnosis from (although they may be brilliant) but I would definitely get in touch with Aspire and they will give you lots of advice. Best of luck with everything.