Is this the normal highs and lows?

LegacyUser

Hi everyone,

Am in a 5 month relationship and despite been in my 30s have only ever had a few long term relationships. Had been single a while before I met my current boyfriend. We hit it off immediately. Like myself he is not without some baggage but he is generally, kind attentive. complimentary etc. We generally only see each other at the weekends as I work late during the week and we don't live that close. We started spending every weekend together I hated us parting when it was over. Talk and message loads during week. This weekend it was like something had changed. He was distant and much less affectionate than usual. If I am close to him he always touches me or holds my hand. Even sex which is usually really good was a bit off on his part. I asked if everything was ok and he said it was fine. I don't want to make issues where there are none as I have a tendency to read into things so I didn't pursue it. I just felt like he was going through the motions and he wasn't that pushed seeing me. We kept miscommunicating and it caused tension. All week we had been talking about how much we were looking forward to the weekend and seeing each other. I actually felt really lonely being in his company and for the first time was glad to leave Sunday. I got the feeling he was glad to see the back of me also! We have been in contact as normal for us since then.

I know there is no such thing as a "normal" relationships but am I expecting too much here? are these a normal part of relationships and you take the rough with the smooth? Do I bring it up with him or not? I was very upset leaving Sunday (didn't show it) and it was on my mind yesterday too. I know I am probably jumping to a major conclusion here but I started to get doubts that he might have cheated. He goes out a lot which I don't!

I know you are only hearing one side but any advice no matter how tough welcomed! Thanks/

LegacyUser

It was one weekend where he wasn't quite his usual self. Maybe he was tired. Maybe some work thing was on his mind. Relax for crying out loud. You're back to texting and catting as usual you say. Calm down and see how next weekend goes. To jump straight to thinking he's cheated over what you've written is mental. Go easy.

ash23

The worst thing about being in a relationship where contact is less frequent is that you are expected to bring your A-game every time.
That's not always possible.
I'm in a long distance relationship and there are times when I'd rather have some me time but himself is scheduled to come over and I probably seem a bit "off" to him but it's not about him. It could be work, family, tiredness, illness or just general grumpiness.

You're used to him being on top form for the weekend with you and it's just not possible to be like that all the time.
You'll probably soon have a weekend where you want to stay in your pjs or hang out with friends but you know he's coming over so you'll do your best to be all "yay! You're here!" but you might not be quite able to pull it off.

Don't worry about it too much. It was one weekend. He'll probably be fine again next week.

Also it's possible he is feeling like he might want the odd weekend to himself to spend with friends or family etc and you both need to be able to say "I can't do this weekend" without it turning into suspicion or over thinking.

Buona Fortuna

Ash makes a good point.

What does he do and how is that going? Is it going well or is it going badly?

I can look back on some projects that you just knew were not going to come in (whatever you did) and that takes its toll a bit.

I think one weekend is a little soon to come to any conclusion.

All the best hun