Awkward moments you had around your parents?

0byme75341jo28

My worst was when I was about 14 and was a hormonal cunt. Anyway, like every healthy young male, I used to take a tug every night before my shower, but this one night in particular my mind must have been particularly preoccupied with thoughts of naked ladies. I was sitting in the living room with my parents who were watching Corrie or some shíte like that, and decided it would be a good time to go for my "shower". So I got up, walked towards the door and told them I was heading upstairs for a shower.. Or so I thought. Guess what I came out with instead? "I'm heading upstairs for a ****." My mam screamed "WHAT!?" at me and my dad looked like he'd shit himself laughing, morto isn't the word. I think I ran upstairs and cried with embarrassment :pac: I never had a pre-shower **** again.

Bad moment. Thank God my brothers weren't in the same room, I'd never hear the end of it...

You got any awkward stories to share?

shruikan2553

Self fellatio expert on TV and remote wouldn't work. This was with grandparents though.

wretcheddomain

I was going to ask my father, but then I realized Savile is in jail.

Birneybau

wretcheddomain wrote: »

I was going to ask my father, but then I realized Savile is in jail.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

I went to my mothers friends sons 21st, I was about 16 or 17, got absolutely rotten drunk, and was wearing the face off some mutt that was sitting between me and my mother.

She was leaving before the night was over and asked me if I was going home or if I wanted to stay with your man. She wasn't even being sarcastic. I hated when she tried to be cool, it was completely awkward.

Then the journey on the way home ... So do you like him then?

No mother. I don't. Stop talking.

FunLover18

Nothing quite so bad as the above but I was showing my mum something in the internet and go to the google search bar only for all my recent searches to appear below. Nothing too weird but still pretty morto.

A mate rented Brokeback Mountain with his dad and brother. Said it was one of the most awkward nights he's ever experienced.

smash

Around 16/17 years ago in my friends house we crept down to get a look at the playboy 10 minute teaser on the sky box in his sitting room and afterwards put it back to the original channel. The next day his folks say they're going to watch a film so we join them and around an hour in the channel changes and on comes the 10 minute teaser... They'd only recorded the movie the night before. Nobody said a word! 10 mins sitting there in an awkward silence and when it finished one of his folks just says "well that was interesting"

Banjo String

Not me (i swear) but my mate.

Anyway, story goes his mam and dad left for a wedding one day, and he had the house to himself for the whole day apparently.

Anyway , his parents on the way to the wedding and realise they have forgotten the camera and decide to drive back to get it.

Cue the mother entering the living room to find their son, naked, **** away with the next door neighbours(a big fat yoke) knickers over his mouth and nose. :eek:

That's roughly 25 years ago and we still call him knicker knocker wanker.

fussyonion

Friend of mine was at my house years ago and she nipped to the bathroom before we headed out.

I got home late and my mother said to me "Your Dad found a sanitary towel on the side of the bath; you should be more careful how you dispose of them"

My jaw hit the floor and I told her it wasn't me and what was she on about?

Was telling friend about it and she confessed that she had nipped to my loo to change her pad and forgot to put the old one in the bin; leaving it on the edge of the bath while she fixed herself up.

I was mortified on both our behalves.

Aethan Dor

It's amazing what hormones can lead to. My 1st serious gf was a decent lass from a good, hardworking family and as we were both 18 we spent a lot of our time at her parents place. Naturally enough it eventually led to us chancing getting it on as soon as we thought we were alone together.

One night we were in the sitting room watching telly on the couch together with a duvet over us. Eventually the parents leave and we get intimate as soon as the door closes but sure enough they return 5 mins later for something they forgot so we froze (mid coitus) when we heard the door, heard someone walk to the kitchen then back and, to our horror, open the sitting room door.......

it was her Mum, thankfully we had only removed my pants and herself her pajama bottoms but she comes into say 'oh I forgot my purse, are you ok ? There's some meat left if you want a sandwich ?'. I dunno how I did but I played it cool while herself was like ok, thanks mam, yeah, ok, later, thanks.

Still amazes me when I think back on it as me and the missus now don't like doing it when our kids are around, Go figure, lol !

Micky Dolenz

I caught my parents having sex,

With our neighbours.

0byme75341jo28

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

I caught my parents having sex,

With our neighbours.

You're joking!? :eek: :pac:

Micky Dolenz

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

I caught my parents having sex,

With our neighbours.

I'd be trying to unsee that for the rest of my life.

PizzamanIRL

Micky Dolenz wrote: »

I caught my parents having sex,

With our neighbours.

Think I saw that online. Hot MILF and husband wife swap with kinky neighbours.

nc19

Walked in on my parents


whats seen can never be unseen........

Toots

I was out at a friend's house one night with my now-husband (I was about 18 or 19 at the time), one of the guys there had made magic brownies and I'd eaten one. It wasn't late when I got home and my parents were in the big sitting room watching TV. I had an attack of the munchies and was busy raiding the fridge when my Dad walked in. He said hello and was chatting to my hubby about football or rugby or something, and I just blurted out "Oh man! I'm sooo wasted!" the other two just stopped talking and my Dad went "What?" and my husband quickly replied "Oh, she had a couple of cans up at Rob's house."

That seemed to satisfy my dad, and after briefly slagging me for being a lightweight, he headed back in to the sitting room. I said to the hubby "Phew, I think I got away with it! I'm more stoned than I thought." He pretty much just facepalmed, because my dad was still standing on the threshold of the sitting room door and definitely heard what I said.

The Strawman Argument

Thought it'd be funny to scare my mam one time when I saw her driving in from work, so I hop into the wardrobe and stay there until I know for sure she's in the room, jump out of the wardrobe going "BOO-oh... sh!te"

She's there in the middle of changing her clothes, f*ck all on, we both just sort of stand there awkwardly for about ten seconds and I walk out of the room. Never mentioned it again.

jokettle

I'd heard good reviews of Orange Is The New Black, and since I share a taste in tv with my dad, I recommended it to him. We ended up watching the first episode together. Oh so many lesbian sex scenes

Toots

Just thought of another one. Last Christmas we were watching a movie as a family (me, hubby, mum, dad, two sisters) and we decided to watch "It's Complicated" figuring that Meryl Streep movies are always good. There were some funny bits but then it got to the bit where herself and Alec Baldwin hook up, and they're lying in bed all post-coital and disheveled, then he grabs her by the crotch and says "looks like those pelvic floor exercises really paid off". I just wanted the ground to open and swallow me up. Worst bit was my mum thought it was hilarious and couldn't stop laughing. My sister and I put our foot (feet?) down and said if she wanted to watch it she could finish it when we were all gone home. We stuck on Die Hard instead.

fleet_admiral

My father in law is extremely socially awkward. I have written about it here before (see this thread).

Anyway, we were watching the liverpool match yesterday with the regular group of lads in the pub that are always there. One of the lads is black and is crazy about Liverpool. Sometime early in the second half the father in law is getting annoyed with Balotelli and turns around to the black lad and says 'That golly wog is useless isnt he'. The faces on everyone was priceless

I must point out that the father in law is very innocent and not a bit racist, he just hears words and then uses them again without thinking of their meaning. for example, he calls toilet paper jam rags after hearing me refer to something completely different

harry Bailey esq

I was caught having a tug by my da,caught ridin twice by the ma over the years.

lufties

I said to my mother that going to the gym is great to get the feramones going...a year later I realised that I meant to say endorphins.

Kev.OC

Last time we painted the kitchen at home the paint was shite, quite frankly. So when it came time to do it up about a year ago I was talking to the folks about that, and said we should definitely stick to one of the big brands like Durex this time...mom was very quick to point out that I meant Dulux...

Jawgap

a few spring to mind......

Most recently - Dad asking me over dinner, in front of my mother, what a MILF is?

My mother finding a used condom under my bed when she came to visit me while I was at uni - she managed to get access to the flat I was sharing and decided to do some tidying up - she never said anything, but the bedroom was immaculate when I got back and it wasn't where I left it.

Having been on an all-day, all evening and all night bender to celebrate the end of my exams I arranged for my Dad to pick me up and bring me home - pi$$ing myself in the front seat of the car was not my finest moment, and one I've yet to live down.

misterdeeds

one night in her parents house: we go to bed early get it on as soon as we close the door, d usual ......... Her mam dad brother and sister were in the living room directly under her room so after a few mins gf gets txt on phone from sis ..... reads go easy up der lol , so we think shes kidding us ( we wished ha ) Next day at dinner her mam dad brother and sister are at the table giving us the look complete silence and felt v akward so after a min r so her dad says "sleep ok last night" morto is not the word ha all I could say was oh ya I did I was tired

had a laugh abt it later we did

anvilfour

OK...

So I was wondering round the house around the age of 14 and happened across my Father and Step Mother's porn stash... nothing major just a few magazines and videos.

One of them is Swedish - this was in the good old days of dial up when hardcore porn videos took so long to download it was all over bar the shouting.

In my defence I was a red-blooded hormonal young teen and as I was alone in the house, I thought I might have a cheeky tug to the Swedish video.

In case anyone came back I threw the curtain in the living room and sat very close to the VCR with the volume at minimal levels so I could quickly eject the VCR and run upstairs if anyone came in... baby wipe at the ready, I put the video into the VCR and saw a lovely young lady being serviced by two obliging Adonis like men...

To cut a long story short I was there pounding at my plums and as it came to a really good bit, I could hear the girl yelling something so craned my neck forward to hear her better... at that exact moment I started spurting and overcome with surprise tried to stand up to avoid getting it over my trousers. My head shot up and smashed into the wooden surround over our television and I don't remember much after that.

I woke up in bed, in my pyjamas. My hair was damp so I figured I'd been in the shower. Came downstairs to see my Dad loading the dishwasher. TV was off.

Near as I can surmise, Dad came home to find his firstborn slumped over the TV blaring bad eighties porn and covered in spunk, picks me up, hoses me down and puts me to bed.

He never said a word but there were some awkward silences after that. He also had a family friend who's a Doctor patch up my head!