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Adoption of stepchild?

  • 17-09-2014 2:08pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I was going to post this in the adoption forum but anonymous posting isn't allowed there, hopefully I will get pointed to the information I need here.

    I am a surviving civil partner who has been parenting alone since my partner died.
    I am planning on proposing marriage soon.
    I am wondering what the process is in this situation regarding adoption? Or indeed whether adoption is necessary in this circumstance?
    Ideally I want to be sure that should I marry and anything happens me, that my family remains intact.
    That my child stays with my spouse and that they would have full legal parental rights.
    That Grandparents or other persons cannot swoop in and claim custody.
    is it just a matter of assigning guardianship? Or is it more complicated than that?
    Particularly with regards to establishing their parental rights while I am alive.

    Any advice will be most appreciated.


Comments

  • Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,948 Mod ✭✭✭✭Neyite


    OP, you may need to give a little more detail in order to fully help you.

    If I am understanding you correctly, you were in a civil partnership with your previous partner, widowed and now in a new relationship?

    Is the child biologically yours, your current partners, or your previous partners?

    I do know that you can apply to adopt your partners child - many have done this when marrying a single parent, which would give full parental rights to the adoptive parent.

    It may be different in a civil partnership though - I know that civil partnership only affords couples some of the rights but not all that a hetrosexual married couple would get. Similarly, this could impact on you if the child is not biologically yours, I'm not sure.

    I would suggest that you get legal advice.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Neyite wrote: »
    OP, you may need to give a little more detail in order to fully help you.

    If I am understanding you correctly, you were in a civil partnership with your previous partner, widowed and now in a new relationship?
    Yes.
    Neyite wrote: »
    Is the child biologically yours, your current partners, or your previous partners?
    The child is biologically mine, with sole custody and guardianship awarded via the courts after the death of my partner.

    Neyite wrote: »
    I do know that you can apply to adopt your partners child - many have done this when marrying a single parent, which would give full parental rights to the adoptive parent.

    It may be different in a civil partnership though - I know that civil partnership only affords couples some of the rights but not all that a hetrosexual married couple would get. Similarly, this could impact on you if the child is not biologically yours, I'm not sure.

    I would suggest that you get legal advice.

    Thanks Neyite, I will be visiting a solicitor in the near future.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 55 ✭✭Zoe zebra


    Would advise that you take legal advice and make a will which also reflects your wishes as death can change everything.

    Consider a scenario where your spouse outlives you and automatically inherits your assets, house etc but then subsequently meets a new partner who doesn't want your child hanging around. Where does your child fit into that new family arrangement and could your spouse ultimately will all the assets to the new partner and leave your child with nothing? These are things you need to consider. You may need to set up a trust in your will to guarantee that your child is provided for and also that guardianship can be passed to other family members if your spouse decides following your death that they actually don't want to raise your child afterall as they want to move on with their life elsewhere.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,275 ✭✭✭✭banie01


    Hey OP.
    I'm in a similar situation myself, best advice I can give to you is to focus on what will provide the best outcome for your child if the worst should happen.
    Speak to a solicitor and get a clear idea of the legalities and paperwork involved but above all remember this.
    It is your childs future that needs protecting.

    In my own ongoing experience of a situation like this, someone(Usually an in-law)will get their back up because you are "moving on" and with considering organizing an adoption and other alternatives to allow your child a stable future that now you have a new partner you are going to start excluding them(The in-laws) from the childs life.
    It is a fear that needs to be tackled, and allayed for them(If you choose to of course)
    It can and will turn into a balancing act,but remember one thing above all else.....
    Its not about balancing their sensitivities against your needs, It is about planning and providing the best most stable outcome possible for your child in the event that the worst comes to pass.
    Assets and Inheritance are best discussed prior to making any decisions around adoption/guardianship and can be protected via trust and perhaps codicil but that is a matter for discussion with a solicitor.

    Best of luck in your new relationship, I know its not an easy path to tread.


  • Administrators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 14,907 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Big Bag of Chips


    I am not certain, but I think in the case where the biological parent has died, adoption is not allowed. Because by adopting the child you are effectively removing the parental rights of the biological parent. Now, I know the biological parent has died - but the right is still there for them to be known as the child's parent.

    I know that this is definitely the case when a couple have been married, but I don't know the scenario when the parents haven't been married.

    This is from Citizen's Information:

    A step-parent adoption occurs when a child is adopted by a married couple, one of whom is the natural parent of the child (usually the mother) while the other is not. Both the natural parent and the step-parent must adopt the child in order to avoid the natural parent losing his/her rights and responsibilities to the child. If a child was born within a previous marriage, where the natural parent has now remarried following a divorce or the death of his/her spouse, the child is not eligible for adoption.

    You should really contact a good family law solicitor to find out.


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