I'm a little shallow, and have too high standards, what to do?

djburchgrove

Just to make clear from the get go, I know it's an asshole way to be, I am a bit of an asshole but people seem to get me and like me despite pissing them off from time to time! So i don't need the lashings for this. I'm trying to change.

So I've noticed about myself recently that when it comes to women, unless I know/heard they are really sound or like one of the lads, I have no time for the less attractive women.

It's not that I'm even great looking myself, I'm probably about a 4 or 5 on the 1 to 10 scale, but I couldn't really care, it is what it is. I only ever have time for the 8s/9s and 10s when it comes to women, and the majority of them aren't interested (which is the same for most men I suppose).

At the moment, I'm lucky enough to have an amazingly nice girl, and a ten in my eyes interested in me. But I'd still like to address this problem... I don't like it and want it to change.

Shanotheslayer

You have a girlfriend. But want to talk to only attractive women? Makes no sense.

Surely if you have a girlfriend it doesn't matter what the other girl looks like that your having a conversation with

Sauve

Mod

Hi there OP,
I'm going to move this thread to the Peresonal Issues forum, I think it's more suited to there.

Sauve.

daisybelle2008

Not sure what the nature of your problem is. Ignoring all the numbers nonsense which is kind if juvenile, you are with a woman who is very attractive in your eyes. Good for you. Thing is beauty is very subjective, there is absolutely nothing wrong with finding some people more attractive than others. You can't force yourselves to find someone attractive and why would you need too, no two people have exactly the same taste in the opposite sex. Different strokes for different folks etc.

PucaMama

djburchgrove wrote: »

Just to make clear from the get go, I know it's an asshole way to be, I am a bit of an asshole but people seem to get me and like me despite pissing them off from time to time! So i don't need the lashings for this. I'm trying to change.

So I've noticed about myself recently that when it comes to women, unless I know/heard they are really sound or like one of the lads, I have no time for the less attractive women.

It's not that I'm even great looking myself, I'm probably about a 4 or 5 on the 1 to 10 scale, but I couldn't really care, it is what it is. I only ever have time for the 8s/9s and 10s when it comes to women, and the majority of them aren't interested (which is the same for most men I suppose).

At the moment, I'm lucky enough to have an amazingly nice girl, and a ten in my eyes interested in me. But I'd still like to address this problem... I don't like it and want it to change.

you have no time for them as in you just dont talk to them or what? what age are you?

DeltaWhite

I've met some gorgeous men and women (as you describe would be 8/9 or 10) who I have to say have as much personality as a discarded toenail... You need to get it in your head that looks are not everything.

Rubberchikken

You say your an ass*ole abd want to chane. What do you want to change?

paddy1990

I dont see a problem. You have standards and thats great.

I suppose one thing to keep in mind is that women generally age quite badly, so the looks youre focusing on will go. Look at the skin quality of any 35 year old woman, look at the wrinkles, the body starts depositing more fat in certain places etc. So keep in mind that the girl will look vastly different in 10-15 years. That might help.

djburchgrove

Shanotheslayer wrote: »

You have a girlfriend. But want to talk to only attractive women? Makes no sense.

Surely if you have a girlfriend it doesn't matter what the other girl looks like that your having a conversation with

No sorry if I wasn't clear, when I'm single / looking. This girl I mentioned is newish.

daisybelle2008 wrote: »

Not sure what the nature of your problem is. Ignoring all the numbers nonsense which is kind if juvenile, you are with a woman who is very attractive in your eyes. Good for you. Thing is beauty is very subjective, there is absolutely nothing wrong with finding some people more attractive than others. You can't force yourselves to find someone attractive and why would you need too, no two people have exactly the same taste in the opposite sex. Different strokes for different folks etc.

Agreed. I don't usually rate people out of 10, just for the context of the post I used numbers to try portray my point better.

retro:electro

paddy1990 wrote: »

I dont see a problem. You have standards and thats great.

I suppose one thing to keep in mind is that women generally age quite badly, so the looks youre focusing on will go. Look at the skin quality of any 35 year old woman, look at the wrinkles, the body starts depositing more fat in certain places etc. So keep in mind that the girl will look vastly different in 10-15 years. That might help.

Well aren't you a gent.

OP you should be more open minded. Some people become more attractive once you've gotten to know them, and equally the pretty ones can lose their looks just as fast if they have ugly mouths.
Anyway you have a girlfriend, so I'm not really understanding your concerns tbh.

eviltwin

If you have a type then that's fine, you have a girlfriend so you must be doing something right. I don't really get what your problem is, do you mean you just can't engage in anyway with women who aren't attractive even if its just in a platonic way?