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Missing affection

  • 16-09-2014 4:54pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all,

    Would appreciate any advice/insights etc! Will try keep it short.
    I’m a late 20s single gal who moved abroad almost a year ago. I’ve pretty much always been single but dated quite a bit over the years, everything from casual set ups to flings to short-term relationships etc.

    When I moved abroad the dating continued, tried the Tinder thing for a while with varied results, the main conclusion being that most guys were out for casual and I’m at the point where I don’t really want to do that anymore.

    I found that with all the first and second dates and sex-then-nothing scenarios my hammering was taking a beating, so about two months ago decided to take a break from it all and focus on myself for a while. No dating, no hooking up, no dating apps, no silly text messages, nothing. I have a busy job and am always on the go so figured it would be easy to let that side of things slide for a while as it’s not as if I have a rake of free time anyway.

    I just find that I am so, so missing the affection side of things. I miss having someone to text and I miss hooking up but it’s more than that. Just someone to fall asleep with and hold hands with etc I suppose. I really don’t want to fall back into a rut of meeting all the wrong men and getting nowhere with anyone again as I did get a bit hurt with the head fcuk of it all and more than anything would love to meet someone special. But I do see the merit in ‘clocking out’ for a while too to build up my confidence and my own life too.

    I suppose I just don’t really know how to reconcile these two things - the need to be on my own until I’m confident to get back out there versus the sort of loneliness that Im experiencing. Anyone have any advice?


Comments

  • #2
    Potatoeman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,479 ✭✭✭Potatoeman


    Tinder is a hookup app its not really designed to help you meet a long term partner. Online dating is pretty hit and miss at the best of times. Have a look at some of the most viewed profiles on regular dating sites and set up one that appeals but be clear with what you want too.


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