Galway The Place Of A Million Thousand Welcomes So Long As Your Not Scottish!

Totally Tropical

Here is Galway Advertisers editors Declan Varleys editorial in this weeks paper.

What have the Scots ever done for us?

Galway Advertiser, Thu, Sep 11, 2014

Next week when the Scots go to the polls to vote whether to stay or nay, there'll be mixed feelings on this side of the country. We might have watched with pride the exploits of Mel Gibson as William Wallace, roaring on his compatriots (all of whom looked like Brendan Gleeson ) in the battle against the Sassanach in Braveheart; we might have found ourselves running down that street with Ewan McGregor in the opening of Trainspotting; we might have found ourselves singing in the street at 4am to the lyrics of The Proclaimers; we probably roared on Archie Gemmill when he scored that wonder goal against the Dutch in the '78 World Cup, but here in Galway, there is only one thing that we have not yet forgiven the Scots for — and that's the stealing of Digital.

We had lived peacefully with our Celtic (and Rangers ) cousins for centuries, always eying each other up and down with a degree of camaraderie but with an even greater degree of suspicion in a sort of 'you couldn't be up to them' sort of way.

But we got on with it. We helped them chop down our trees; we picked their praties, our priests set up their football clubs; we even pretended to believe them about the Lough Ness Monster in a 'sure ya did, sure ya did' sort of way. They even accommodated us when Ollie Campbell kicked us to the Triple Crown back in the eighties. And seeing so many of these Scots on British TV (that we watched illegally using deflector systems across the west ), we became attuned enough to their accents to be at last fully able to understand what Donegal people were saying.

But all that was blown to bits in 1993, when we were told that the Scots were stealing Digital. Our Digital. The mainstay of our economy. Our best hope in the annual Tops of the Town competition. The only company around with the dosh to spread around on frivolous things like that.

Yes, they were stealing our Digital.

And bringing it off to Ayr. Where? Ayr?

Only those of us who had regularly perused the fourth division of Scottish football for results like East Fife 4 Forfar 5 had ever even heard of Ayr. It was probably a grand place but we didn't know much about it. We didn't know that it was in fact the location for the first Scottish Parliamnt 800 years ago next year, that Cromwell was there and built a huge wall around it. You see. We can’t even blame Cromwell for Digital cos he never came west.

What made the stealing of Digital even worse was that Ayr was actually just across the water from this island of ours. On a clear day from the promenade in Ayr, your eye can stretch itself and see the Northern-most tip of Northern Ireland. However, the only consolation to us was that Ayr never got to win the Tops of the Town competition, so they might have taken our jobs, but they didn't manage to steal our creativity here in the west.

Now it emerged at the time that the only reason Ayr got it was because some large UK Ministry of Defence contract had swung things in the favour of the Scots... but at least that won't happen again if the Scots vote to leave the UK next week.

It will be a momentous vote and one that might embolden the newly independent Scots to be a major player in the battle for foreign direct investment. So no doubt they might come sniffing around our top companies now. So if you see anyone with a clipbaord and a kilt, shout at them, get a Donegal person to act as an interpreter and tell them to feck off back to Ayr or Dunfermline or Arbroath or wherever the hell it is they're planning to bring Boston Scientific or Cisco or SAP to.

An independent Scotland changes so many things — Great films like Gregory's Girl and Trainspotting will no longer be found in the UK Cinema section of the DVD shops. Instead it will be moved into the category of World Cinema.

But the best part of it all, is that for the first time in ages, we have a close neighbour we could invade. And win. No more moral victories, but a real win. Recall all the FCA guys, get the lads from Dun Ui Mhaeliosa and Athlone to head east and let’s get sailing.

We've a chance of wining, cos unlike in Braveheart, Brendan Gleeson would now be on our side. The Brits will take all their nuke submarines from the Scottish ports as the new Scots put all their money into bairns not bombs. We could invade them on a Saturday night, catch them unawares and in the dark of the night, with a few hefty fishing trawlers from Rossaveal and in a Dunkirk-like operation, we could steal back Digital. Now wouldn't that be something. Best of luck, my Scottish friends. Vote early and vote often.

http://www.advertiser.ie/galway/article/72266/what-have-the-scots-ever-done-for-us

Galway recovered well from the Digital closure by becoming a town that sold it's soul for the tourist dollars.Mr Varley should pay a visit to towns like Youghal in county Cork which is a town that has been ravaged by factory closures and unemployment or Waterford a city that is consistently screwed up the backside by Galway when it comes to employment and investment.At least the local media in Waterford have accepted their citys misfortune with a bit more dignity.They have made their points clear and fought their own corner without making snide remarks about other countries and it's inhabitants.

The_Valeyard

So I says to Mavis.....

snubbleste

Who cares?

Roger Hassenforder

snubbleste wrote: »

Who cares?

I care!
here wondering what did he say to Mavis?

dodderangler

Galway ....... A great bunch of something something.

The Backwards Man

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDJflQfNUE8

kingchess

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

I care!
here wondering what did he say to Mavis?

weeeell-she was in a right huff, what ever he said to her

Roger Hassenforder

kingchess wrote: »

weeeell-she was in a right huff, what ever he said to her

was if fatal what he said?

Donkey Oaty

An independent Scotland changes so many things — Great films like Gregory's Girl and Trainspotting will no longer be found in the UK Cinema section of the DVD shops. Instead it will be moved into the category of World Cinema.

Hmmm...

And in London’s last remaining DVD shop, Gregory’s Girl will quietly be re-categorised as “world cinema”.

- Charlie Brooker, The Guardian, 8th September 2014

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Anyway it's a hundred thousand welcomes not a million thousand - that's not even a numerical expression.

The_Valeyard

Well she said "do you mean Mabel"?

Shakespeare's Sister

Totally Tropical wrote: »

Here is Galway Advertisers editors Declan Varleys editorial in this weeks paper.

What have the Scots ever done for us?



http://www.advertiser.ie/galway/article/72266/what-have-the-scots-ever-done-for-us

Galway recovered well from the Digital closure by becoming a town that sold it's soul for the tourist dollars.Mr Varley should pay a visit to towns like Youghal in county Cork which is a town that has been ravaged by factory closures and unemployment or Waterford a city that is consistently screwed up the backside by Galway when it comes to employment and investment.At least the local media in Waterford have accepted their citys misfortune with a bit more dignity.They have made their points clear and fought their own corner without making snide remarks about other countries and it's inhabitants.

Terrible article but it's just a poor attempt at mock anger humour, it's hardly serious.
Very misleading thread title.

glynf

"It will be a momentous vote and one that might embolden the newly independent Scots to be a major player in the battle for foreign direct investment. So no doubt they might come sniffing around our top companies tax dodging multinationals now."

In fairness, its only the galway Advertiser, not exactly a bastion of journalistic excellence.

wp_rathead

Fecking Scots. Staying over there. Taking our American corporation jobs!!

kingchess

Mabel is her Sister,she is a friendly sort of Girl if you know what I mean,not a bit like the stuck up and moody Mavis,

ChunkyLover54

Totally Tropical wrote: »

Galway recovered well from the Digital closure by becoming a town that sold it's soul for the tourist dollars.

As opposed to Waterford or Youghal, towns that "keep it real" :rolleyes:

Really I don't think the article was meant to be taken that seriously if his other editorials are anything to go by.

Varley is a Mayo man. Has done some excellent editorials but usually not the best.

Totally Tropical

ChunkyLover54 wrote: »

As opposed to Waterford or Youghal, towns that "keep it real" :rolleyes:

Really I don't think the article was meant to be taken that seriously if his other editorials are anything to go by.

I think your missing the point.Galway is the number 1 tourist town in Ireland along with Killarney.Im not attacking Galway for that.That's the route it went down and fair play to them.Galway has it's decent sorts and not so decent sorts like everywhere else.But going by the tone of that article (mock humour or otherwise) one could swear that Galway was some mining town in the north of England that never recovered from losing it's number 1 source of employment as opposed to a place that has a monopoly on other places (with the exception of possibly Cork city and it's environs) outside of Dublin when it comes to job creation and investment!

Winston Payne

Borders no.2 wrote: »

Varley is a Mayo man. Has done some excellent editorials but usually not the best.

Varley is a pox on this county and an atrocious writer. Arsenal man too, to top it off.

Iranoutofideas

I got as far as they stole our digital and thought - "go way you fcukin mucksavage"