Doing activities by yourself??

rosedream

Why is it that people always feel weirded out when say someone does something on their own, whether it is going to a cinema, going to a pub on your own, going on a holiday by yourself, travelling by yourself, maybe even a concert or festival by yourself? Just basically all things in life where it is more the social norm to have someone with you? This being aimed more towards "loners" than just people who might not have someone available to bring, like their partner or best mate.

I mean I do get that you could be tarred with the same brush from people who are genuinely odd
(not to be mean or anything, but witnessing someone at a cinema coming into the screening, and after 15 minutes gets up and starts
pacing up and down the steps between the rows of seats for 3 minutes staring at other people in their seats before leaving is not exactly what you would call normal),
but as long as they are not directly hurting you, why should u care about it? Especially when people do come in on their own and just sit and watch the film, no funny business or anything, but yet people feel the need to comment on them.

I mean if you ask me, to expect someone just to stay indoors all the time and not do anything just because there is no one in their life to do things with is way worse, as it just damages social skills even more and being more anxious going out into the public.

I mean surely it is better to see people going out and experiencing things, even if it is on their own, rather then to be stuck at home all the time, either watching telly or going on the computer?

Witcher

Fair play to you, some people can't scratch their arse without having a friend there for company and to take a photo.

The Purveyor of Truth

Tell me about it.

Last week the Guards knocked on my car window and asked me what I was doing parked down a laneway with my windows all steamed up.

Masturbating I said, but sure he just looked at me like there was something wrong with me.

Same happens when I go to the cinema and sit amongst the couples in the back row, they give me weird looks, even though I go out of my way to make sure I smile at them.

RoboRat

I have on many times gone to the cinema by myself because I like to watch a film and not have to explain what is going on to my wife!

I have also gone to the pub by myself and had a pint and read the paper. Sometimes you get in a chat with other people. I have no issue with it.

ScumLord

The Purveyor of Truth wrote: »

Masturbating I said, but sure he just looked at me like there was something wrong with me.

There's no winning, when you call your friends and say "I'm having a **** do ye want to call over" they just never speak to you again. What's up with that?

Sauve

More room for activities!

Ughh

Feel comfortable going on my own to a concert or a cinema, not sure about going to a pub but I am not a huge drinker to be honest. I don't worry what others think.

The Purveyor of Truth

rosedream wrote: »

I mean surely it is better to see people going out and experiencing things, even if it is on their own, rather then to be stuck at home all the time, either watching telly or going on the computer?

Of course it is. Nobody sure ever not go out just because what other people might think of them. Fcuk what other people think.

Cinema, concerts, theater whatever, can sometimes be more enjoyable on your own, than going with someone who can never stfu for two minutes.

The Peanut

Used to bother me more as a teenager and early twenties. Not bothered at all now; with young kids it's more difficult for us both to get out regularly anyway.

rosedream

rosedream wrote: »

Why is it that people always feel weirded out when say someone does something on their own

Do they?

catallus

bluewolf wrote: »

Do they?

There's no earthly reason for anyone to be weirded out by it!

And who says "activities" anyways!? :rolleyes::mad:

Ughh

bluewolf wrote: »

Do they?

Don't think so.

Unearthly

Cinema culture during the day is definitely being on your own more than with someone. Last time I was there on a Thursday afternoon everyone was on their own.

Independence ftw

verywell

I sometimes have to go to places on my own now purely cos I am in that transition phase where most friends have started to have kids/loved up. Plus I don't live in my home county anymore and making friends is not that easy sometimes.

I love going to the cinema by myself. I'll munch away and laugh at scenes without anyone turning their heads to me expecting me to laugh when they laugh.

The Backwards Man

'Going anywhere nice on holidays this year Mr Backwards?'

'Yeah, going to <insert wherever>'

'That's nice, who all is going?'

'Just me'

*look at me like I've got two heads*



Honestly, I can't thing of a single thing I would rather do with others than by myself.

The Peanut

The Backwards Man wrote: »

'



Honestly, I can't thing of a single thing I would rather do with others than by myself.

Really?;)

The Backwards Man

The Backwards Man wrote: »

'Going anywhere nice on holidays this year Mr Backwards?'

'Yeah, going to <insert wherever>'

'That's nice, who all is going?'

'Just me'

*look at me like I've got two heads*



Honestly, I can't thing of a single thing I would rather do with others than with myself.

Really? I got loads of people enthusing about how great it'd be getting up when you want, going where you want and when you want, doing whatever you want without having to consult the group. And they were right

Aglomerado

Some people think it's odd; my parents express surprise and terror if I say I am going to something "on my own". I went to the pub and onto a gig on Friday all on my own.
The alternative was to miss the gig altogether because none of my friends are into the singer as much as I am. I noticed lots of other people there by themselves too. Each of them, like me, did not have two heads.

Antar Bolaeisk

Aglomerado wrote: »

Some people think it's odd; my parents express surprise and terror if I say I am going to something "on my own". I went to the pub and onto a gig on Friday all on my own.
The alternative was to miss the gig altogether because none of my friends are into the singer as much as I am. I noticed lots of other people there by themselves too. Each of them, like me, did not have two heads.

Some people are like that, it's almost as if they absolutely need someone with them to verify what's happening is real.

Getting mixed responses from telling people I'm heading off on holidays alone, some people think it's great some people think I'm weird. I don't care though as I can go to all the places I want to.

The Backwards Man

bluewolf wrote: »

Really? I got loads of people enthusing about how great it'd be getting up when you want, going where you want and when you want, doing whatever you want without having to consult the group. And they were right

Yeah, there's plenty of those too, but it's quite funny to see the look of absolute horror on some people's faces at the thought of going somewhere on their own. I often wonder how they manage the toilet to be honest.

Aglomerado

Antar Bolaeisk wrote: »

Some people are like that, it's almost as if they absolutely need someone with them to verify what's happening is real.

Getting mixed responses from telling people I'm heading off on holidays alone, some people think it's great some people think I'm weird. I don't care though as I can go to all the places I want to.

And you can tour them at your own pace too. I féck off abroad on my own a couple of times a year, I've been to places I'd never have seen if I'd waited for someone else to have the time/ money/ inclination to join me.

The Peanut

Aglomerado wrote: »

And you can tour them at your own pace too. I féck off abroad on my own a couple of times a year, I've been to places I'd never have seen if I'd waited for someone else to have the time/ money/ inclination to join me.

So, so envious.

Aglomerado

The Peanut wrote: »

So, so jealous.

You can do it too, you know!

The Peanut

Aglomerado wrote: »

You can do it too, you know!

I get away a long weekend a year with buddies and considering myself dong very well. Maybe when kids are older, I retire, win lotto and don't work ........

BeerWolf

After Hours, and not a single **** joke on first page?

AH you disappoint me...

Edit - Scratch that, post #3.

/wahey

Antar Bolaeisk

BeerWolf wrote: »

After Hours, and not a single **** joke on first page?

AH you disappoint me...

Activities was an innuendo.

Aglomerado

BeerWolf wrote: »

After Hours, and not a single **** joke on first page?

AH you disappoint me...

Edit - Scratch that, post #3.

/wahey

There's a lot of stiff competition from the "Women on the Inside" thread!

The Peanut

Aglomerado wrote: »

There's a lot of stiff competition from the "Women on the Inside" thread!

Must pop over. Stopped reading after first few pages of sensible discussion.

Aglomerado

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Yeah, there's plenty of those too, but it's quite funny to see the look of absolute horror on some people's faces at the thought of going somewhere on their own. I often wonder how they manage the toilet to be honest.

The thought of doing stuff by myself USED to fill me with trepidation. And then I realised how much I was allowing myself to miss out on. The more I do, the easier it becomes. What I usually do is book a flight/ concert ticket etc on a particular date, then mention it to my friends to see if anyone's up for it. If yes, great, welcome along. If not, sod it, I'm going anyway!

Some things are more fun with other people, like going out on the piss. I'm happy to sit in a pub early in the evening with a newspaper and a pint, but I'll be long gone by 9pm.

Ughh

Aglomerado wrote: »

And you can tour them at your own pace too. I féck off abroad on my own a couple of times a year, I've been to places I'd never have seen if I'd waited for someone else to have the time/ money/ inclination to join me.

And no talking for a couple days.

rosedream

I'm just curious to know if it is more of an age thing?
I mean, I would be open-minded to a lot of things and not care about other people business, but, just an example,
I would admit that on nights out or to the cinema, I would see guys or girls who look to be my age (early 20s) completely on their own. On nights out, whether they went out on their own or just got separated for nearly most of the night, they do stick out a bit, not because there is anything wrong with it,
but because you nearly expect a young person to be surrounded by friends or at least one companion. I don't ever care about what others do, but I have always noticed that, but on rare occasions.

Wheras, for example, I have seen elderly men in the pub having a pint at the bar and either watching the match, reading the paper, or chatting with the bartender and it would not even cross my mind to wonder why they are on their own. Or to the cinema, or a festival, or anything for that matter.
I do think when others get older, they even give off a vibe about them that says "At this stage of my life, I genuinely don't give a f**k what others think and I will do what I want."

FullblownRose

rosedream wrote: »

Why is it that people always feel weirded out when say someone does something on their own, whether it is going to a cinema, going to a pub on your own, going on a holiday by yourself, travelling by yourself, maybe even a concert or festival by yourself? Just basically all things in life where it is more the social norm to have someone with you? This being aimed more towards "loners" than just people who might not have someone available to bring, like their partner or best mate.

I mean I do get that you could be tarred with the same brush from people who are genuinely odd
(not to be mean or anything, but witnessing someone at a cinema coming into the screening, and after 15 minutes gets up and starts
pacing up and down the steps between the rows of seats for 3 minutes staring at other people in their seats before leaving is not exactly what you would call normal),
but as long as they are not directly hurting you, why should u care about it? Especially when people do come in on their own and just sit and watch the film, no funny business or anything, but yet people feel the need to comment on them.

I mean if you ask me, to expect someone just to stay indoors all the time and not do anything just because there is no one in their life to do things with is way worse, as it just damages social skills even more and being more anxious going out into the public.

I mean surely it is better to see people going out and experiencing things, even if it is on their own, rather then to be stuck at home all the time, either watching telly or going on the computer?

Ehm...I always wondered about that..you've just answered the question! If you're correct, it means people feel that they need to bring a friend so that people will know they're not so dodgy that nobody will hang around with them. I.E they aren't a erson who might get u and start shouting at others, or doing the other strange things you mentioned.

I think in part it's just that some people spend too much time envisaging situations where others will be looking at them and forming opinions/ making judgements.. that's no way to send your life, just worrying about what kind of nasty conclusions bad-minded people might come to..

catallus

FullblownRose wrote: »

....
I think in part it's just that some people spend too much time envisaging situations where others will be looking at them and forming opinions/ making judgements.. that's no way to send your life, just worrying about what kind of nasty conclusions bad-minded people might come to..

What kind of judgments!?

FullblownRose

catallus wrote: »

What kind of judgments!?

Judgements like, there is something really wrong with that person who is here on their own..because if they were normal/unthreatening/safe/likeable, they would have a companion. That is my guess, based on something the O.P said..it is not a thought I have EVER had about anyone..

jimgoose

FullblownRose wrote: »

Judgements like, there is something really wrong with that person who is here on their own..because if they were normal/unthreatening/safe/likeable, they would have a companion. That is my guess, based on something the O.P said..it is not a thought I have EVER had about anyone..

Some of us are antisocial bastards who are quite happy in our own company only from time to time. And if you don't like it you can fcuk off. See what I mean?? :cool:

FullblownRose

jimgoose wrote: »

Some of us are antisocial bastards who are quite happy in our own company only from time to time. And if you don't like it you can fcuk off. See what I mean?? :cool:

And I have no problem with that, Mr. Goose! You can fcuk off an' all

jimgoose

FullblownRose wrote: »

And I have no problem with that, Mr. Goose! You can fcuk off an' all

We salute. :cool:

The Strawman Argument

The whole point of going to the cinema for me is to switch off life for 2-3 hours. No need for another person there whatsoever.

I'm generally content with about 2-3 good friends in the area to break up patches of me by myself and another few to send **** to on facebook though.

FullblownRose

jimgoose wrote: »

We salute. :cool:

\m/

roro1990

Off to Thailand for the second time within a year on my own soon. Being 24 I get judgmental looks from anyone my age when I tell people i'm doing it alone. Prefer solo travel to be honest.

Strawberry Swan

People do judge you for doing things on your own if they are the kinda people who rarely do anything on their own. They judge particularly if it involves going to the pub, cinema or gig. I myself have done all of the above on my own and it does make me slightly nervous but I still enjoy them. There are so few other females doing the same I find. The only girls I see at gigs are either with their boyfriends or friends. Hardly ever on their own. One always sees older men drinking alone in a pub, but rarely, if ever, an older woman, or woman of any age. I'm presuming it's because of unwanted attention? Or is there a social stigma attached?

--LOS--

I think i need to do more stuff on my own, for the second night this week I made plans and people cancelled :mad:

stefan idiot jones

catallus wrote: »

And who says "activities" anyways!? :rolleyes::mad:

The lucky ones with the fancy sauce.