need help for anxiety

kks

Hi,

I am a wife & mother to a 1 year old, i'm 32 and a pretty happy person most of the time. Every once in a while, usually every 2 years or so, i go through a period where I suffer from anxiety attacks. Part of me feels that I will never get out from this place when I am in it, and then when I get back to myself fully (ie having days where there is no panic, which is usually anywhere from 1 week to 2 months) i can't ever imagine being in that place.

The latest rounds started this Monday, and left me feeling quite low. Every time these attacks happen, I am coming into a period of down time; for example, im on summer holidays from my job and im about to go on my holidays. However, I don't always get them coming into holidays, it's just that whenever i do get them, I tend to have more free time.

I want to move forward from these attacks and understand them. Each cycle it happens, I feel like i work really hard at trying to find a reason, and go to counselling to help transition me back. This time around, I feel that it's to do with the fact that I'm scared to be by myself, alone with my thoughts. previously, i though the issue was in how i relate to those closest to me (although this could still actually be about me being afraid of myself).

I'm not sure if i'll ever find an answer, and if i just have to accept that this will happen every once in a while, and just let it pass when it passes, or should i keep trying to find an answer, and make changes in my life. Regardless of this, i still do feel I have some changes to make in my life; I am obese and while i used to think it didnt bother me, i feel guilty that my daughter has an unhealthy mother so I am really working hard to change this. I also think that sometimes I can be a bit stagnant, in what I choose to do with my free time, and in the time that my husband and I spend together and I would also like to take steps (in fact I have done) to improve this. I have found that all i want to do in my free time is sit in front of the telly and eat, which is clearly not helping anything, and adds to the guilt.

I'm not sure why im posting this, other than it feels good to write it down, i'm wondering if anyone has gone through anything similar, and i guess im looking for validation. Part of me feels i needs to stop looking for that validation and listen accept my own opinions, another part of me cant be bothered listening to myself, and another part of me thinks that i'm fixating on something to avoid the issue at hand (I dont know what that is though).

I can be quite obsessive, according to my friends, and i dont know if that's something i do to distract myself out of the anxiety which works 95% of the time, and if so, is that so bad? surely that's better than being on medication and being upset most of the time?

anyway, thanks for listening, and i'm happy to hear other people's thoughts. Thankfully, none of these has interfered with my being a mother, and i'm so grateful i can still take pleasure from all the funny things she does, and take care of her.

theredletter

Hi there,

anxiety, from personal experience, can be a nightmare - racing thoughts, sweaty palms, feelings of being detatched from reality etc.

If you feel like it's becoming a massive problem for you then I'd approach your GP and explain the situation. You should definitely consider asking them for a referral to a good CBT counsellor. GPs can also write scripts for short term medication that will help you through bad patches or even longer term medicine like anti-depressants.

Your best bet for now would be to make an appt and see what resources are available to you to overcome your problems.

Ross

Rubberchikken

You're making good changes to yourself so well done for that.
Could you speak to your gp and see what they recommend?

You're right to want to get fit, it's great for you and for your daughter. And exercise is great for helping with anxiety.
Take care

kks

Rubberchikken wrote: »

You're making good changes to yourself so well done for that.
Could you speak to your gp and see what they recommend?

You're right to want to get fit, it's great for you and for your daughter. And exercise is great for helping with anxiety.
Take care

Thanks rubberchicken. My husband is actually in that line of work and he's been very supportive. I don't feel that it requires medical intervention, but I'm quite keen to do some psychological intervention, and I'm seeing a counsellor, although I think cbt could be helpful.