Brother attempted suicide

Koptain Liverpool

Some quick advice please people:

My brother has been living abroad and have just heard he is on a flight home after what appears to have been an attempted suicide.

He was in care in the country and was released to a custodian on the basis of being sent home to his family.

We dont know much else yet.

What should be our first step?

The GP? The hospital? Some specialist centre?

We were told that he has denied it was a real attempt and was more a cry for help. So he may resist serious treatment....

Any advice appreciated

ABajaninCork

I'd book an appointment with the GP first. He can request your brother's records from where he was living.

You can then ask the GP to refer your brother to the local Mental Health team (Sorry, not sure what they're called here, but the GP can advise).

Taltos

You really do need to talk to your GP as soon as possible. Prepare a list of questions

eg
1. What can be done?
2. Are there any local groups / facilities to help?
3. What if he refuses treatment?
4. What can be done if he continues to refuse treatment?
In all of this don't forget about you and the rest of your family, this might be one of the most stressful things you will have to deal with, so all the more important that you take appropriate time and care of yourself...

The best thing but unlikely is for your brother to admit he needs help and to seek it, it may be quite a struggle if he is in denial, but again talk to your GP on how or if you should approach that. There are also some useful links in this thread - some you can reach out to right now. For example turn2me.org is a registered account here on boards - you can simply contact them as you would any other poster.

Koptain Liverpool

Thanks for the advice folks

ABajaninCork

The GP might not give information to family. Be prepared for that.

Might be a better idea to talk to Mental Health Ireland as well. They can give you support as well as pointers to help support your brother if he does not wish to engage with the health professionals - Which is likely. Be prepared for that too.

Pawwed Rig

Here are a list of resources you could consider using http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057178293

Tokyo

OP,

just to add to the advice given above - Pieta House provides services for the families of those are in suicidal distress and those who engage in self-harm.

Their step-by-step action plan for helping a family member in suicidal distress can be found here.

LegacyUser

All good advice and resources, but the first step is to talk and listen to your brother. You can't judge the next steps without that and jumping ahead won't help him. Have the information ready, not decisions.

Rubberchikken

Great advice but i agree with ^. Talk and listen to your brother first. He's an adult and should be given the opportunity to decide what comes mext.

Take care

whiteandlight

Sorry you are going through this. My sisters on her 6th attempt in 4 years. It is very hard and recovery is a long road and a huge battle for the patient.

You've been given all the advice for your brother. My advice is for you.

This is going to be hard. You and the family are going to go through a lot of emotions, shock, anger, frustration, despair over the next while. This is normal.

You need to get counselling. All of you in the close family and on your own not as a group. Family therapy is offered by a lot of places but the reality is that it is usually aimed at the patient themselves not the family. It has taken until this year to convince close family to go to counselling (I went three years ago) and it has helped enormously. It might feel like you are being a bit self centred but there are going to be tough conversations ahead and while he is recovering he is likely to lean a lot on the family. You will need help.

Second, with the consent of your brother, tell your friends. I was lucky as I was I college and had made a total break from home so I could safely tell my friends and get their support. It really is important that the people in the structure around you are aware of the strain you and your family are under. Even if it's a case that you just need to vent for 5 minutes on the phone, that is important. If one of them asks how you are, be honest. Otherwise they will wonder why you are cranky, frustrated, annoyed etc. sometimes you need an outside perspective, not family. You will be surprised at how many of them will have similar problems.

Last, best of luck. You and your family, and your brother can get through this. Even in worst case scenarios there is always hope and you have to think positively. Don't be afraid to ask for help and support, or take a break if you need to. Wishing you all the best

Koptain Liverpool

Thanks once again for all the advice guys.