the man

ohohseven

Hi everyone, I would like some advice from anyone here.
I have a two year old daughter and recently she has started seeing "the man" it started about two weeks ago we where in bed and she pointed at the door and said who's that man daddy, I kind of ignored it. The second time we where walking down the stairs and she said theres the man. Then finally she was in her room tonight kind of whinging saying the man is at the wardrobe. Anyway is this just a case of over active imagination or is there really a man ?. My partner is freaking out. Thank you in advance.

degrassinoel

Pretty creepy, has there been any unfamiliar men at the house that she would have seen.. i mean like gas meter/tv license inspectors or survey guys, door-to-door salesmen etc.. that she might have gotten a bit of a fright from, or not been used to seeing?

Could be something really simple like that, if ye were to ask her about what colour clothes the man has, like a uniform or colour that might give it away, is he wearing a hat, does he have shiny shoes, is he tall, short, ye could use your partner as a template

If it's causing you stress - change the subject with her, and tell her that it's just a shadow.

ohohseven

degrassinoel wrote: »

Pretty creepy, has there been any unfamiliar men at the house that she would have seen.. i mean like gas meter/tv license inspectors or survey guys, door-to-door salesmen etc.. that she might have gotten a bit of a fright from, or not been used to seeing?

Could be something really simple like that, if ye were to ask her about what colour clothes the man has, like a uniform or colour that might give it away, is he wearing a hat, does he have shiny shoes, is he tall, short, ye could use your partner as a template

If it's causing you stress - change the subject with her, and tell her that it's just a shadow.

I asked her what he is wearing, she said trackys like daddy( that's me ) and he has black hair. Shes not scared though the only man other than myself that has been in the house in the last while is my friend Stephen and she loves him so I doubt that's it. Could it be a spirit ?

degrassinoel

Could just be imagination, if she's not scared by it i'd reckon it's harmless whatever it is. Chances are she'll grow out of it fairly soon anyway

But if you're really worried or the partner needs some non paranormal type advice - ye should bring it up here, they'd really be ones to talk to for a proper opinion on what way to tackle it

torrentum

A friend of mine had the same problem except the child called it "the bad man". The moved house (nothing to do with the bad man - other reasons) and after 2 weeks in the new place, the child said to the father " Daddy, there's no bad man in this house ". Make of that what you will, but when I read the OP story, this immediately came to mind.

ohohseven

torrentum wrote: »

A friend of mine had the same problem except the child called it "the bad man". The moved house (nothing to do with the bad man - other reasons) and after 2 weeks in the new place, the child said to the father " Daddy, there's no bad man in this house ". Make of that what you will, but when I read the OP story, this immediately came to mind.

well luckily hes not a bad man well not that the little one said. another freaky thing is for the last two weeks a butterfly has came into the house. The same butterfly or so it would seem.

rubbledoubledo

Same here.
A relation of mine, same thing with her little boy.
Kept saying and pointing the man the man

Whispered

ohohseven wrote: »

well luckily hes not a bad man well not that the little one said. another freaky thing is for the last two weeks a butterfly has came into the house. The same butterfly or so it would seem.

We've had five or six butterflies in a day on average lately. It's a nightmare because one of my dogs like to try catch them. But it must be the time of year for them so I wouldn't read too much into that part anyway

Perkinstock

My friend kid sees spirit all the time. There was this time that he was playing in his room when he saw a man standing in the door looking straight to him.

ohohseven

Sorry i have not replied been a bit busy. Tonight i was lying in bed after getting holly to sleep and i heard a glass beeaking so i went downstairs and there was a jam jar on the floor in pieces. Im here alone tonight with holly and i cleaned the kitchen an hour ago, i hate jam so i didnt take it from the fridge and either did anyone else. Im kind of freaked now.

Riamfada

ohohseven wrote: »

Sorry i have not replied been a bit busy. Tonight i was lying in bed after getting holly to sleep and i heard a glass beeaking so i went downstairs and there was a jam jar on the floor in pieces. Im here alone tonight with holly and i cleaned the kitchen an hour ago, i hate jam so i didnt take it from the fridge and either did anyone else. Im kind of freaked now.

I would say that because this thing with "the man" is on your mind you have associated the jar breaking with this. If you have never heard the kid say anything, the jar would still have broken but you wouldn't have thought anymore about it.

Really I wouldn't worry about it. Kids grow out of these things and jam jars break. Chances are you "disturbed" the jam jar when you were cleaning.

ohohseven

Riamfada wrote: »

I would say that because this thing with "the man" is on your mind you have associated the jar breaking with this. If you have never heard the kid say anything, the jar would still have broken but you wouildn't have thought anymore about it.

Really I wouldn't worry about it. Kids grow out of these things and jam jars break. Chances are you "disturbed" the jam jar when you were cleaning.

Although I agree with you that still doesn't explain why it fell from the fridge ?. The fridge was still closed when I went to investigate. And I didn't take it from the fridge as I hate jam.

ohohseven

Whispered wrote: »

We've had five or six butterflies in a day on average lately. It's a nightmare because one of my dogs like to try catch them. But it must be the time of year for them so I wouldn't read too much into that part anyway

Funny you should mention about your dog, my dog ate the butterfly tonight poor butterfly.

ohohseven

rubbledoubledo wrote: »

Same here.
A relation of mine, same thing with her little boy.
Kept saying and pointing the man the man

I'll call Joe must be all this fluoride making our kids hallucinate.

ohohseven

Perkinstock wrote: »

My friend kid sees spirit all the time. There was this time that he was playing in his room when he saw a man standing in the door looking straight to him.

How does he cope with it ?.

Ziycon

There is nothing to suggest what your child is seeing is a spirit or ghost, it's purely an assumption made by yourself backed up by your beliefs, the most recent scary movie you've seen and tons of hear'say from stories and the internet.

Your child's brain is still developing and as it creates/breaks connections to different parts of the brain we have no idea what affect this has on a child's vision, hearing, sense of smell etc. For example all we know this 'man' could be something along the lines of sleep paralysis due to the maturing of the child's brain where memories or dreams are mixed with wakeful period of time, another assumption.

Basically what I'm saying is don't jump to the spirit/ghost answer when its a very good possibility that it's a part of a child growing up/brain development, every child goes through the phase of seeing 'the man' or the imaginary friend, even you and me so this would push me more to a development stage that all children go through rather then every child is seeing ghosts.

torrentum

Ziycon wrote: »

There is nothing to suggest what your child is seeing is a spirit or ghost, it's purely an assumption made by yourself backed up by your beliefs, the most recent scary movie you've seen and tons of hear'say from stories and the internet.

Your child's brain is still developing and as it creates/breaks connections to different parts of the brain we have no idea what affect this has on a child's vision, hearing, sense of smell etc. For example all we know this 'man' could be something along the lines of sleep paralysis due to the maturing of the child's brain where memories or dreams are mixed with wakeful period of time, another assumption.

Basically what I'm saying is don't jump to the spirit/ghost answer when its a very good possibility that it's a part of a child growing up/brain development, every child goes through the phase of seeing 'the man' or the imaginary friend, even you and me so this would push me more to a development stage that all children go through rather then every child is seeing ghosts.

Taking the logic of brain development that you stated, what if this brain development gives the child an ability to see things adults can't see?

Ziycon

torrentum wrote: »

Taking the logic of brain development that you stated, what if this brain development gives the child an ability to see things adults can't see?

I never said that the development of a child's brain does or doesn't give/take away any abilities which are at present are unknown, I was merely pointing out that there is no need to jump to the conclusion that it's paranormal related and how easy it is to make assumptions.

On reply to your question, I would think it's highly unlikely that a child can see anything that an adult can't as both child and adult eyes are composed and built the same and can only see within a limited light range, with that said it's an assumption on my part as it can't be 100% verified.

As with the jam jar, like Riamfada said, looks to be an example synchronicity.

ohohseven

Ziycon wrote: »

I never said that the development of a child's brain does or doesn't give/take away any abilities which are at present are unknown, I was merely pointing out that there is no need to jump to the conclusion that it's paranormal related and how easy it is to make assumptions.

On reply to your question, I would think it's highly unlikely that a child can see anything that an adult can't as both child and adult eyes are composed and built the same and can only see within a limited light range, with that said it's an assumption on my part as it can't be 100% verified.

As with the jam jar, like Riamfada said, looks to be an example synchronicity.

I do agree with you on every point, I don't believe in ghosts or spirits well I didn't before and I still don't know if I do. And as for the jam jar incident my fridge like I'm sure everyone else's is airtight so it cannot be a simple case of me disturbing it. Even if I did how did it fall from the back of the fridge onto the floor and then the fridge door closed tightly again by itself ?. My daughter is about two foot tall and was asleep when it happened. And I'm not being an ass I genuinly want an answer to that because other wise it will drive me mad. My grammar is awful before anyone says it

gowestcallme

Is it this guy?


He really freaks me out.... a lot

Sacksian

ohohseven wrote: »

I do agree with you on every point, I don't believe in ghosts or spirits well I didn't before and I still don't know if I do. And as for the jam jar incident my fridge like I'm sure everyone else's is airtight so it cannot be a simple case of me disturbing it. Even if I did how did it fall from the back of the fridge onto the floor and then the fridge door closed tightly again by itself ?. My daughter is about two foot tall and was asleep when it happened. And I'm not being an ass I genuinly want an answer to that because other wise it will drive me mad. My grammar is awful before anyone says it

If everything was as you described (jam jar at the back of the fridge, closed fridge, etc), then you could have a Tollpatschgeist. They're generally not malevolent and prefer to stay hidden/undiscovered but they are very clumsy and often butter-fingered, as seems to be the case here.

As far as you can, try and replace ceramics with plastic dishes, plates, cups and buy jams in plastic jars, etc to minimise the risk of further breakage. Otherwise, basic safety precautions (e.g. make sure the area at the top of stairs is clear, stuff like that) will help reduce the impact it has on your day-to-day living.

My grandfather had one for about 15 years but, one morning, it went to open the curtains and fell out of a second-floor window and was never heard or seen again.

ohohseven

Sacksian wrote: »

If everything was as you described (jam jar at the back of the fridge, closed fridge, etc), then you could have a Tollpatschgeist. They're generally not malevolent and prefer to stay hidden/undiscovered but they are very clumsy and often butter-fingered, as seems to be the case here.

As far as you can, try and replace ceramics with plastic dishes, plates, cups and buy jams in plastic jars, etc to minimise the risk of further breakage. Otherwise, basic safety precautions (e.g. make sure the area at the top of stairs is clear, stuff like that) will help reduce the impact it has on your day-to-day living.

My grandfather had one for about 15 years but, one morning, it went to open the curtains and fell out of a second-floor window and was never heard or seen again.

I doubt there's many idiot ghosts hanging around the house.

Oryx

My 3yo nephew talks to 'the man' in his room at night and has mentioned seeing him around his house for ages. My own son used wave at someone invisible all the time when he was small. Whatever the cause, it is very common.

Don't make an issue of it though. Just accept it as normal to the child. It will fade away. If you ask questions of the child you'll find they will often invent answers to please you so it tells you nothing. You have to let them talk without asking anything.

The worst thing you can do is get jumpy about this and the jamjar thing. It will only make you hypersensitive to everything and your child might even pick up on that. Look on it as a curiosity, interesting but harmless.

ohohseven

Oryx wrote: »

My 3yo nephew talks to 'the man' in his room at night and has mentioned seeing him around his house for ages. My own son used wave at someone invisible all the time when he was small. Whatever the cause, it is very common.

Don't make an issue of it though. Just accept it as normal to the child. It will fade away. If you ask questions of the child you'll find they will often invent answers to please you so it tells you nothing. You have to let them talk without asking anything.

The worst thing you can do is get jumpy about this and the jamjar thing. It will only make you hypersensitive to everything and your child might even pick up on that. Look on it as a curiosity, interesting but harmless.

Yeah we just stopped reacting, the other night holly came running into our room crying saying I don't want the woman to take me. I am very close with her she's a bit of a daddy's girl but in two and a half years she has never held onto me so tight. It was a man before but a woman now, she was so frightened we had to stay in her grandmother's house. I know that's showing her it's ok to run away from things that scare her but I wasn't thinking that way. I just told her everyone gets scared sometimes.

Oryx

There is another approach to take that might work. Accept that this man or woman is very real to your child. So what would you do if a real person was frightening them? You'd square up to them and warn them off. So do that. And mean it, for yourself too. Tell 'them' vocally and mentally, to sod off and leave you alone. Do it from an attitude of strength rather than fear, and if you have a faith you believe in utilise that.

I don't know whether this works spiritually or psychologically but it can be effective.

ohohseven

Oryx wrote: »

There is another approach to take that might work. Accept that this man or woman is very real to your child. So what would you do if a real person was frightening them? You'd square up to them and warn them off. So do that. And mean it, for yourself too. Tell 'them' vocally and mentally, to sod off and leave you alone. Do it from an attitude of strength rather than fear, and if you have a faith you believe in utilise that.

I don't know whether this works spiritually or psychologically but it can be effective.

Yeah I did that, she hasn't mentioned it again since. So we will see how it works out.
Thanks.