how green is your ar$ehole?

recylingbin

Methane is one of the big contributors to global warming. FACT!*
Do you do your bit by holding in your farts or do you break wind with gay abandon?
How many times a day do you trump?


*Global warming may be a farce

Buzz Killington the third

What's gay abandon?

Renegade Mechanic

Buzz Killington the third wrote: »

What's gay abandon?

It would have done the RSA a world of good.

Aglomerado

recylingbin wrote: »

Methane is one of the big contributors to global warming. FACT!*
Do you do your bit by holding in your farts or do you break wind with gay abandon?
How many times a day do you trump?


*Global warming may be a farce an arse

FYP :pac:

Gannicus

recylingbin wrote: »

Methane is one of the big contributors to global warming. FACT!*
Do you do your bit by holding in your farts or do you break wind with gay abandon?
How many times a day do you trump?


*Global warming may be a farce

With gay abandon. Daily nightly and ever so rightly.

SEPT 23 1989

I will stop when those feckin Chinese stop opening a coal burning power station every 3 minutes

moneyman

recylingbin wrote: »

Methane is one of the big contributors to global warming. FACT!*
Do you do your bit by holding in your farts or do you break wind with gay abandon?
How many times a day do you trump?


*Global warming may be a farce

It's no more a farce than the earth being round is.

Aglomerado

Is it not bad for your health to hold in your farts?
Let 'em rip I say (and always where you can blame someone else for the smell)

solomafioso

Quite green after a few of those McDonald's Shamrock Shakes.

eyescreamcone

moneyman wrote: »

Global warming is not a farce! How people can still think it is is beyond me.

This planet has been warming up and cooling down at different times since day 1.
I would imagine we'll find it difficult to regulate climate change up or down by any significant amount.

Davarus Walrus

Trying to contain your 'bum musings' after a night hoovering back 12 pints of stout, followed by half a chicken, and a garlic and cheese chips is just impossible, and could be very damaging to your internals if tried for too long. Best to offer an apology in advance to colleagues/family/partner for the unspeakable sounds and odours about to emerge from you throughout the day.

Links234

moneyman wrote: »

It's no more a farce than the earth being round is.

Yeah, the earth is a mobius strip!

BeerWolf

Privately, alone, I let it loose - else if in company I hold it in.

Women can hire a flatus patsy to blame it on someone

jimgoose

No, I fart like a dragster. I don't care, 'cos I'm furkan hard me, ah am, laaahk. :cool:

RobertKK

moneyman wrote: »

It's no more a farce than the earth being round is.

It is elliptical :P

KungPao

I find that if I eat a pepperoni pizza and have a 6 pack, you'd better have the scented candles at the ready. Things usually get serious the next morning

WesternZulu

It's the bacteria found in the rumen (stomach chamber) of ruminant animals (i.e. sheep and cows) that release methane when breaking down food.

Humans really don't produce methane so there is no need to hold in them farts!

Duggy747

Fart in a jar and store them.

They age like fine wine.

MarkR

Garlic pizza. Hilarious consequences.

Anyway, The average person produces about half a liter of farts every single day, and even though many women won't admit it, women do fart just as often as men. In fact, a study has proven that when men and women eat the exact same food, woman tend to have even more concentrated gas than men. If a person were to fart continuously for 6 years and 9 months, they would produce gas with the equivalent energy of an atomic bomb.

Doctors disagree on whether or not holding in a fart is bad for your health. Some experts think that farts are a natural part of your digestive system, so holding them in won't harm you. Others think that at best, holding them in can cause gas, bloating, and other uncomfortable symptoms, and at worst, repressing gas can cause hemorrhoids or a distended bowel.

Even if you clenched your butt and held them in all day, the gas will escape once you relax. What's more relaxing than sleep?

Renegade Mechanic

MarkR wrote: »

What's more relaxing than sleep?

Taking a massive whizz. I do be like an old strimmer:o

uch

I was always taught never to hold in Farts, so I'm generally like a Massey Ferguson with dodgy timing

ScumLord

WesternZulu wrote: »

It's the bacteria found in the rumen (stomach chamber) of ruminant animals (i.e. sheep and cows) that release methane when breaking down food.

Humans really don't produce methane so there is no need to hold in them farts!

This is a shocking revelation, I had to look it up. apparently only 50% of people have the bacteria that can produce methane but most people can produce flammable hydrogen, which is the fuel of the future, we need to find a way to tap that ass.

Zab

ScumLord wrote: »

This is a shocking revelation, I had to look it up. apparently only 50% of people have the bacteria that can produce methane but most people can produce flammable hydrogen, which is the fuel of the future, we need to find a way to tap that ass.

In fact, the vast majority of the methane isn't even coming from the cow's ass, it's coming from its mouth.