should I call /text him?

begrandx

Hi all my head is fried id love some advice, I met a guy a few months back and while I didn't sleep with him on the 1st or 2nd night, I did the 3rd night and have done twice since, the thing is this was all spaced out over a couple of months, I would bump into him in the same bar we both always go to every couple of weeks but with very little contact in between. It seems to have turned into a FWB situation even tho we're not friends!
The last time this happened was Saturday night I was in the bar, he wasn't out and I stupidly text him late in the night asking was he out, I immediately got an invitation to his house which I took him up on!
I now can't get him out of my head as when we do meet it's non stop talking and we get on really well, there's also chemistry there and a huge attraction (from my side anyway!)
So I left Sunday morning and haven't heard a thing since. Is this doomed to be a booty call situation?
I'm sure if he was interested he has my number!
I have text him before out of the blue once or twice and he always responds but has never initiated texts himself.
Is he just not that into me, should I just move on and forget him?
Im also conscious he may think that I do this a lot but the truth is I hadn't slept with anyone in over a year since I broke up with my ex

Merkin

He's probably just interested in sex but then when you look at it, that's all that's been on the cards until now really so who knows!

If you think you'd like to go on a date with him and won't mind if he decides that he doesn't want to, I don't think you've anything to lose by asking him if he fancies meeting for a drink at the weekend. He mightn't want to as he may not be interested or he might be delighted but worth a try if you fancy him.

If he says no though I wouldn't sleep with him again as it's clear you'd like more.

Azwaldo55

Text or ring him to meet up and when you are together tell him honestly how you feel. He can take it or leave it then. If he is up for a serious relationship that's great. If he is not and you are quite happy to continue sleeping with him that is fine too. Or if you don't want to sleep with him any more then don't.

December2012

Call him and ask him for a date. For all he knows you're just into the booty calls too.

Matteroffact

I would not get in touch with him again. He knows how to get in touch with you and he is not doing it. You initiated the last contact and contacting him again would be chasing after him. The ball is in his court now so back off and see what he does. If he does not contact you then you have your answer, he is not interested.

Azwaldo55

Matteroffact wrote: »

I would not get in touch with him again. He knows how to get in touch with you and he is not doing it. You initiated the last contact and contacting him again would be chasing after him. The ball is in his court now so back off and see what he does. If he does not contact you then you have your answer, he is not interested.

Don't listen to this advice OP. The guy is not psychic. You have to tell him how you feel. Communication is key. For all you know he could feel the same way and you might miss a chance to have relationship if that is what you want.

begrandx

What I'd really like is for him to know that I don't do this kind of thing all the time, but I don't know how to get that across as so far he's probably thinking that this is all I want! As we've only ever met while on nights out etc.with drink involved
I'm fairly introverted normally and not very good at expressing my interest in someone in the cold light of day. Just wish he wasn't stuck in my head so much

Tilly

If I were you I'd text him and ask him if he fancied going for lunch over the weekend. If he says no you know where you stand. If he says yes then you go on a date without drink and will see if there's something deeper there.

Flippyfloppy

begrandx wrote: »

What I'd really like is for him to know that I don't do this kind of thing all the time, but I don't know how to get that across as so far he's probably thinking that this is all I want! As we've only ever met while on nights out etc.with drink involved
I'm fairly introverted normally and not very good at expressing my interest in someone in the cold light of day. Just wish he wasn't stuck in my head so much

'The lady doth protest too much, methinks'

Why do you need him to know this? What will be affected by you telling him this?

If it's so he realizes that you're girlfriend material after all, it kind of just seems like you're beating around the bush. Maybe be a bit more direct with him, see if he wants to progress to the next level and go from there.

ash23

At the moment you are f*ck buddies. As in, you hook up when you're both out or you partake in booty calls. All well and good if that is what you want. If not then you need to change it by asking him to go on a date.

Ask him out for dinner or to a gig or for lunch.......something that isn't just "hooking up".

See if he accepts. If not then he just wants you as a f*ck buddy.

Dellnum

begrandx wrote: »

Hi all my head is fried id love some advice, I met a guy a few months back and while I didn't sleep with him on the 1st or 2nd night, I did the 3rd night and have done twice since, the thing is this was all spaced out over a couple of months, I would bump into him in the same bar we both always go to every couple of weeks but with very little contact in between. It seems to have turned into a FWB situation even tho we're not friends!
The last time this happened was Saturday night I was in the bar, he wasn't out and I stupidly text him late in the night asking was he out, I immediately got an invitation to his house which I took him up on!
I now can't get him out of my head as when we do meet it's non stop talking and we get on really well, there's also chemistry there and a huge attraction (from my side anyway!)
So I left Sunday morning and haven't heard a thing since. Is this doomed to be a booty call situation?
I'm sure if he was interested he has my number!
I have text him before out of the blue once or twice and he always responds but has never initiated texts himself.
Is he just not that into me, should I just move on and forget him?
Im also conscious he may think that I do this a lot but the truth is I hadn't slept with anyone in over a year since I broke up with my ex

You are the one doing all the runnin' it seems. This guy knows you are interested in him as you have been making the first move since you met him. He responds but doesn't initiate anything, so why not give him a chance to initiate something. If he was interested he would contact you. I do not agree with the posters who advise you to ask him out on a date and ask him what he wants. It is so obvious, to me anyway. When someone is interested in you, you know it, you don't have to wonder.