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Would you clean someone else's skid marks

  • 19-06-2014 09:43PM
    #1
    brightkane
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,728 ✭✭✭


    Out for dinner with the girlfriends parents to meet them for the first time.

    head off for a sh1t after because of a dodgy spar hot chicken roll I had at lunch.

    Notice skid marks in the toilet before taking the throne but decide not my problem.

    Hear her father outside the jacks on the phone and the enter the toilet. I see hes from his foot steps he is not going to the p1sser and waiting outside the cublicle. He obviously was at the same spar or has a closet coke problem and wont share.

    I thought about cleaning the toilet of the previous sh1tters skid marks prior to handing over the toilet roll baton but decide not to.

    Girlfriend tells me a week later her told her mother I left the toilet bowl in a terrible state (true but not my sh1t) and i was hoping he wouldnt be bothered looking as of the acidic smell I had left in the cubicle.

    Anyways, would you clean it or leave it..


Comments

  • #2
    MayoSalmon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,344 ✭✭✭MayoSalmon


    Yes with my tongue


  • #3
    Aint Eazy Being Cheezy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,634 ✭✭✭Aint Eazy Being Cheezy


    You tell your girlfriend that he came onto you, and he's just being spiteful cos you turned him down.


  • #4
    FearDark
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,425 ✭✭✭FearDark


    That's the best story ever.


  • #5
    Aidric
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,591 ✭✭✭✭Aidric


    lol

    hose it down with a piss


  • #6
    catallus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,106 ✭✭✭catallus


    MayoSalmon wrote: »
    Yes with my tongue

    You dirty bastard. PM sent ;)


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  • #7
    dee_mc
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,199 ✭✭✭dee_mc


    Is this what people mean when they talk about 'over sharing'?


  • #8
    PirateShampoo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,406 ✭✭✭PirateShampoo


    And that's exactly how this country ended up in the awful state it's in now.


  • #9
    Sir Arthur Daley
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,720 ✭✭✭Sir Arthur Daley


    Aidric wrote: »
    lol

    hose it down with a piss

    Get a semi first to bring up the psi.


  • #10
    Atlantic Dawn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 85,666 ✭✭✭✭Atlantic Dawn
    GDY151


    Classic booby trap, you have 3 options...

    1 piss on it to clean it off imagining your flute is a Karcher powerwasher
    2 put the seat up so next user assumes it wasn't you
    3 clean it


  • #11
    Lucifer MorningStar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,218 ✭✭✭Lucifer MorningStar


    Aidric wrote: »
    lol

    hose it down with a piss

    and semen


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  • #12
    catallus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,106 ✭✭✭catallus


    Actually, I can't imagine a person who wouldn't clean a toilet after themselves. And I prefer not to think of such odious things.


  • #13
    wretcheddomain
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,094 ✭✭✭wretcheddomain


    What a sh1t story :pac:


  • #14
    Sir Arthur Daley
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,720 ✭✭✭Sir Arthur Daley


    Lucifer MorningStar wrote: »
    and semen

    You would be leaving evidence at the scene then.


  • #15
    Charlie19
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,948 ✭✭✭✭Charlie19


    Just cover with toilet roll..

    Simple really.


  • #16
    pow wow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,288 ✭✭✭pow wow


    FearDark wrote: »
    That's the best story ever.

    You need to get out more.


  • #17
    Lenin Skynard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,970 ✭✭✭Lenin Skynard


    I think people sometimes mistakenly accredit men of a particular age with being paragons of virtue. Really a lot of them are like Victor Meldrew/Norris from Coronation Street.

    I wouldn't skidmark all over the toilet in someone's house but I certainly wouldn't go to the extent of cleaning a public toilet either.


  • #18
    Hande hoche!
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,950 ✭✭✭Hande hoche!


    brightkane wrote: »
    Out for dinner with the girlfriends parents to meet them for the first time.

    head off for a sh1t after because of a dodgy spar hot chicken roll I had at lunch.

    Notice skid marks in the toilet before taking the throne but decide not my problem.

    Hear her father outside the jacks on the phone and the enter the toilet. I see hes from his foot steps he is not going to the p1sser and waiting outside the cublicle. He obviously was at the same spar or has a closet coke problem and wont share.

    I thought about cleaning the toilet of the previous sh1tters skid marks prior to handing over the toilet roll baton but decide not to.

    Girlfriend tells me a week later her told her mother I left the toilet bowl in a terrible state (true but not my sh1t) and i was hoping he wouldnt be bothered looking as of the acidic smell I had left in the cubicle.

    Anyways, would you clean it or leave it..

    That line was magnificent.


  • #19
    fleet_admiral
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,750 ✭✭✭fleet_admiral


    Aidric wrote: »
    lol

    hose it down with a piss
    yeah use the yellow toilet brush


  • #20
    mosstin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,317 ✭✭✭mosstin


    catallus wrote: »
    Actually, I can't imagine a person who wouldn't clean a toilet after themselves. And I prefer not to think of such odious things.

    Odious things? Ha! Your username rhymes with phallus.


  • #21
    kupus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,151 ✭✭✭kupus


    shouldnt this be moved to politics forum?


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  • #22
    e_e
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,464 ✭✭✭e_e


    OP is like something out of Curb Your Enthusiasm


  • #23
    bnt
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,116 ✭✭✭✭bnt


    Get enough Toilet Duck in there, then the brush, who cares whose s#!t was whose? Sometimes, if you want a job done right, have to do it yourself.

    You are the type of what the age is searching for, and what it is afraid it has found. I am so glad that you have never done anything, never carved a statue, or painted a picture, or produced anything outside of yourself! Life has been your art. You have set yourself to music. Your days are your sonnets.

    ―Oscar Wilde predicting Social Media, in The Picture of Dorian Gray



  • #24
    Tail Docker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,954 ✭✭✭Tail Docker


    I'm like an Arab, no-one ever sees me have a crap. Public loo? Not a hope. My idea of hell. That might just be me and the Arabs though.


  • #25
    Micky Dolenz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 44,079 ✭✭✭✭Micky Dolenz


    Shyte thread is shyte.


This discussion has been closed.
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